“She didn’t want to stay anymore. What was I supposed to do, lock her in her rooms?”
“I don’t believe it was that simple.”
“You can believe what you want, father,” I say, tired of this discussion already.
“Alec,” he says, and I look back into his eyes. “First—it’s only a matter of time until we need to announce that Saintland’s Sweetheart isn’t…your sweetheart anymore…if she’s truly not planning to return. Second—you’re not required to tell me, but I sense that something happened between you two that you feel is irreparable.” He pauses. “I saw the way she looked at you whenever you were together.”
“It is irreparable.”
“If I can offer you one piece of advice, Alexander…” He glances at the wall to his left, where a framed picture of my mother hangs among several other family photos. “I would try to repair things before it’s too late. You can’t go on like this.”
“I won’t,” I say, trying to sound confident and reassuring, but failing miserably. “Someone else will come along.”
“Do you really believe that?”
“Who knows? It could even be Mariana Moretti.”
My father doesn’t take the bait, just gives me a sad smile. “I just don’t believe she wanted to leave your side.”
“It’s all right,” I say, standing up to go. “She was too good for me anyway. It’s better this way.”
As I leave the council chamber, it stabs me like a knife in the heart. I felt so happy having her by my side, and I’d never been happier when I was kissing her, touching her, in bed with her.
It might have been the best thing for her when I told her to return to New York, but it’s misery for me.
Chapter Forty-Three
Jessica
Though not staying in New York occurred to me while I was sitting in the lobby of Heights Marketing, as soon as I’m back out on the street, breathing in the fresh air—well, if not fresh air, at least outside air—the wheels in my mind begin to spin faster and faster, fleshing out my plan.
I can’t stay in New York.
I can move to another city, one that has definite possibilities. Seattle.
I can’t believe I didn’t think of it before now. My college roommate Jamie has wanted me to visit Seattle, where she’s lived since we graduated, ever since we were ordering our graduation gowns. She’d researched all the best spots for nightlife and had a list.
Jamie was a planner.
I’m absolutely positive she’ll let me stay with her while I find a place, although my innate determination has other ideas.
“I won’t need to stay with her,” I think. “I’ll line up my own place, and a job, before I even go.”
This time, I’m going to do this right.
I’ll even have a backup plan.
As soon as I’m off the subway, I send Jamie a message.
Sorry I’ve been MIA. Are you still down for a visit?
She texts me back before I’m even inside my building.
Yes!!! When? How long? I can’t wait to show you the city!
I smile down at my phone, feeling excited about something for the first time since I touched down in New York.
Still figuring out a few details. I’ll let you know. But SOON!
Step one is complete.
Then I remember that I just walked out on the interview Carolyn set up for me. Step two: tell my roommate that not only am I planning to move, I totally blew off the interview she set up for me at the last minute. Fuck.
I turn around, heading back out the revolving door at the entrance to our building. This occasion calls for wine.
Carolyn’s not thrilled to learn I didn’t go through with the interview, but in typical Carolyn fashion, she accepts my apology wine and moves on after a mere three minutes of irritation. Once I start planning my big move aloud, she joins in.
“It’s sad, though,” she says, halfway through the bottle of wine. “Even if you can be flaky, you’re a great roommate. It’ll be lonely without you.”
I wave my hand in the air. “You’ll be able to find a replacement.”
She wrinkles her nose. “Nah, I think if you go, I’ll just keep the space to myself for a while.” At least I don’t have to feel guilty that Carolyn won’t be able to afford the rent. She affords most of it on her own anyway.
“I’m not sure when I’m leaving. Don’t get too excited.”
“I won’t. Want to order Chinese?”
Over the next few days, I start—as they say in the business world— “working my network.” Christian doesn’t love the idea that I’m moving to Seattle—he likes the challenge of setting me up with all his newest acquaintances, and ever since he lost his brother and did a stint in rehab, he’s been pretty protective—but he’s a good-natured guy with a gazillion contacts across the country, and he has an interview lined up for me in less than two weeks.