“Like what?”
“Like anything having to do with Cade Morgan.”
She licked her lips, then shook her head. “Honestly, Mike. You saw him touch my shoulder and you’ve blown that up in your head until it’s crazy. No, I’m not mixed up in anything with Cade Morgan.”
“You’re sure?”
“Absolutely sure.”
The phone rang, as it always does in a politician’s office, so I took my leave. I went to the grocery store, got my rice and beans and a ribbon for Tanya’s hair—I know that’s an old west thing to do but I was feeling like an old westerner—and carried it all out to Bob. That was when it hit me. I would have smacked myself in the head had it not been for the rice, the beans, the ribbon, et al in my arms. I put the groceries in Bob and went off to make a call. Since the world had not ended, the Hell Creek Bar was open. I went inside and asked Joe if I could use his telephone. He allowed it, I dialed the number, waited until it was picked up and said, “This is Mike. Meet me at your gate in an hour. It’s about the IRS investigation.”
I thanked Joe, thought about a beer, thought it best to keep my head clear, then purchased a Rainier, anyway. It was hot outside and Bob didn’t have air conditioning. I drove up Ranchers Road, enjoying my beer, and stopped at the steel gate of the Haxby ranch. Sam, Carl, and Jack, leaning against a truck inside the gate, were waiting for me. I pulled into the entrance and the gate opened automatically but Sam motioned me to stop. “Get out and approach the gate,” he said.
I did as I was instructed. “Hidy boys,” I said.
Sam studied me. “What’s this about the IRS?”
I feigned ignorance, something I’m pretty good at. “IRS? Oh, you mean what I said to Jack? I told him ‘I are ess-tremely needin’ to talk to you.’”
The Haxbys were not amused. “You got ten seconds, maybe less,” Sam growled.
“All right,” I said. “I’ve been thinking about who killed Toby. You know, the big Russian guy out at the marina? I’m sure you know all about it. In fact, after I gave it some thought, it occurred to me there was only one man, or men in this case, who had not only motive but the balls to do it. That would be Sam Haxby and his boys.”
The Haxbys did not blink an eye. “That’s bullshit and you know it,” Jack said.
“Look, I’m not criticizing you. Somehow, you figured out he killed our bull and those cows and thought he had it coming. I happen to agree.”
Sam cocked his head. “You wearing a wire?” he asked.
I took off my shirt, throwing it onto Bob’s hood. “Does this look like I’m wearing a wire?”
“Take your hat off. Your pants, too.”
“Sam, nobody ever put a wire in a man’s hat or his pants.”
“Your underwear, too,” he said.
My purpose in all this was not to crack the case and send the Haxbys to jail. No, indeed. I just wanted to find out if my hunch was correct. I thought it over, then took off my boots, my pants, my underwear, and my hat in that order, putting them on Bob’s hood. This, as fortune would have it, was just as Flora Feldmark came trundling along in her old truck. She raised her hand to us and the Haxbys touched their hats. I just waved. Flora’s eyes went as wide as saucers but she kept going. I tell you, Whoever made this planet and put humans on it sure had a sense of humor and still does.
Anyway, I picked up my hat and used it to cover my privates. Not that I was shy, I just didn’t want to get little big Mike down there sunburned. “OK,” I said. “Clean as a whistle. So, how about it? When did you find out Toby was the killer of cows?”
“Hell, that’s news to me,” Sam said.
“Come on, Sam,” I wheedled. “Did he say something? Or did you see that Green Monkey Wrench Gang note in his pocket?”
Sam chewed that over, and said, “So you think we did it. Well, go right on thinking that, Mike. Guess it was a good thing it got done.”
“So you’re saying you did it?”
The Haxbys laughed, then, without another word, walked back to their truck. I guess one of them had the remote in his pocket because the gate started to close. Then they drove away. I watched the dust cloud of their truck rise behind them and considered what I’d just learned. They had confessed that they had killed Toby. Or had they? I turned around to get my clothes just as Flora came trundling back. She stopped her truck and rolled down the window. “Mike, you having some trouble?”
“Doctor says I have a Vitamin D deficiency, Flora.” I pointed abstractly at the sun.
“As much skin exposure as I can get, he says.”