I turned from the mirror. “Like I said, maybe one day, but not now.” I moved away, trying to focus.
She trailed me across the room, insistent. “But why? Shouldn’t you be celebrating? I mean, you’re practically the queen, so—”
I spun on her, enraged. “But I am not the queen. That title belongs to my mother, who nearly died. That you so casually brush over that fact makes the condolences you just gave me meaningless. What don’t you get, Josie? Do you think this job is nothing but dresses and galas?”
She stood there, stunned. I watched her eyes dart around the room, checking to see if anyone was watching our interaction. I didn’t want to humiliate her. In a way, I understood her. There might have been a time when nothing brought me more joy than a reason to start a guest list, a time when I thought this role was nothing more than dresses and galas myself. . . .
I sighed. “I’m not trying to insult you. But it would be inappropriate to throw a party when my mother is still recuperating. Please, what I need from you tonight is some level of understanding, which I realize may be too much, considering our history. Still, for my sanity, I beg you, just try to consider what it’s like to be in my shoes.”
She sulked. “That’s all I’ve ever wanted. Of course that only matters to you when it’s convenient.”
I wanted to rip her head off. What part about my life right now did she think was convenient? But I had a broadcast to think about.
“Excuse me?” I called to a passing maid. “Please escort Miss Josie to her room. Her attitude tonight is unsettling, and I need to concentrate.”
“Yes, Your Highness.” The maid turned cheerfully to Josie, not worried about our personal issues and ready to do her job.
Josie huffed. “I hate you.”
I pointed to the door. “Yes, and you can do that from your room just as well as from here.”
Without waiting to see if she obeyed, I made my way to my seat. I’d never seen it set up this way: the Elite on one side and a single chair on the other.
As I was staring at the sad, lonely seat, Kile sidled up to me.
“What was that with Josie?”
I smiled and batted my eyes. “Nothing, sweetheart. Just making me seriously doubt how much I want her as an in-law.”
“Still too soon.”
I laughed. “No, we had a . . . disagreement. And I feel kind of bad, because I understand her. I just wish she could understand me.”
“That might be hard for Josie. She’s only aware of herself. Also, have you seen Gunner?”
I squinted. “He left this afternoon. Didn’t he say good-bye?”
Kile shook his head.
I walked over to the other boys, who all sat up straighter as I approached. “Did Gunner say good-bye to any of you?”
The others shook their heads in confusion as Fox cleared his throat. “He stopped by to see me. Gunner’s a bit sentimental, and he didn’t have it in him to go through a long farewell. He just said this wasn’t right for him and that he had your approval to go.”
“He did. We parted on very good terms.”
Fox nodded. “I think he thought he’d lose his resolve if he stuck around. He asked me to pass on to everyone how much he would miss you.” He smiled. “Really nice guy.”
“He was. But take his words to heart,” I pleaded, looking at each of their faces. “This is about your futures as well. Don’t stay for something that you might not be able to handle.”
Kile nodded, looking suddenly pensive. Hale gave me a bright smile. Ean was impassive as ever, and Henri was taking in Erik’s translation, looking confused.
Certainly I’d spend the rest of my evening overanalyzing their expressions, but for now, we had a show to put on.
“Hale,” I whispered, pointing to the gown. “Thank you.”
“Beautiful,” he mouthed. I knew he meant it, and I tried to hold myself taller. I wanted to do this dress justice tonight.
The cameras went on, and I greeted the country as honestly as I could.
“Let me begin with the news you’re most eager to hear. My mother is doing well. As I speak, she is healing in her room, with my father by her side.” I tried to stop focusing on how I was standing or what I should do with my hands. Instead I thought of my parents, no doubt watching this in pajamas with doctor-approved snacks by their sides. And when I pictured that, I smiled. “We all know that their love story may be the truest one ever told. Though it has been no small task to step into my father’s role.
“My brother, Ahren, now the prince consort of France, is also a testament to the power of the deepest love. From what I understand, he is settling into his new position very well and is already very happy to be a husband.” My smile crept through again. “None of this surprises me. His devotion to Princess Camille over both time and distance has been constant and strong, and I can only imagine his happiness at getting to be beside her every moment.