She couldn’t make any decisions without his consent – even if they might ease her personal pain.
“Are you alright, Esme?” Gritting her teeth, the young woman looked over at Doctor Snell, praying for deliverance.
“No,” She panted, wiping away the thin sheen of sweat from her brow. “I am not ok. I am in pain.”
He chuckled softly, nervously. “Well, that’s par for the course. Are you sure you don’t want that epidural?”
“Not without Daniel’s consent.” She managed, moaning as yet another contraction threatened to unhinge her. Jesus, she just wanted someone – anyone to hold her hand - to reassure her that everything was going to be alright.
No doubt that relief would never come. She’d have to get through this by herself, and when it was all said and done, she’d have to recover by herself. It would be one of the hardest things she’d ever done – but she’d make it. She always did. Then, later, when the moment was passed, she’d allow herself to mourn for what she had lost.
At that moment, a commotion came from the hospital room door. There were several protests from nurses and orderlies before the door was yanked open and Esme’s eyes widened as they were met by concerned cerulean gaze. “Esme!” Without hesitation, the man was across the room in an instant, kneeling by her bedside as he took her hand in his. “Esme, are you OK?”
The young woman was so shocked that she couldn’t speak – at least not until another contraction drew a groan from between her clenched teeth. “I’m…I’m fine. In a amazing amount of pain, but this is par for the course, really.” It was hard to remain cool and detached when her body was rebelling against her – and when she remembered the knife Daniel had driven into her heart the last time they’d properly spoken. “Your baby will be here soon.” She mustered a small smile, tugging her hand from his grip gently when all she wanted to was cling to it. “Where’s Alyssa?”
Daniel’s eyes darkened in a thunderous anger she’d never seen the likes of before. Slowly, deliberately, he took her hand in his once more. “She won’t be here, Esme. She’ll never be here again, I’ve made sure of that.”
Her heart stuttered in her chest as she found herself trapped in the intensity of his gaze. “I was wrong, Esme. I was wrong, and you were right. That woman is no mother to my child. You are little bean’s mother. You and only you. And I was a callous idiot for failing to realize that.”
It was if all the bitterness, all the uncertainty and pain within Esme was suddenly released. A heaviness that had hovered over her chest for the past few months was suddenly lifted and her heart was ecstatically light – right before pain clenched every muscle in her body and a cry of discomfort escaped her.
Daniel immediately reached for the Doctor Snell, yanking the man over to him. “Why is she in so much pain?” His voice was on the edge of panic. “Isn’t there something that can help her?”
“An Epidural.” Amos replied without a beat, despite the fact that Daniel was nearly throttling him. “But she refused without your consent. And now it’s a bit late.” Tugging Daniel’s fingers from his collar, he rounded the bed to kneel between Esme’s legs, reaching up to check her dilation.
Esme winced at the pressure as Dr. Snell nodded, satisfied. “You’re fully dilated, Esme.” He reached up to lower the stirrups from either side of the bed and place her feet in them. “Now, I need you to push.”
So suddenly?
Fear seized her heart a moment before Daniel squeezed her hand between his own, his gaze reassuring. “I’m here, Esme.”
She bore down with all her strength, a scream of agony tearing from her. Still, Daniel didn’t look away. He endured her iron grip on his hand, her thrashing and the ungodly sounds of discomfort she made as she struggled to bring his baby into the world.
It seemed an eternity of pain – of straining muscles and exhaustion – before a squalling cry finally split the air. A split second later, Doctor Snell cradled a squirming bundle in his arms, and nurses rushed forward to help him clean the baby’s face and body. Esme’s heart pounded as Amos wrapped the child in a soft, cream colored blanket, before turning to them. His eyes met Daniel’s, and the rancher shook his head slowly, before gesturing to Esme.
The young woman felt her heart stop, as everything around her ceased to exist.
“Congratulations, Esme. It’s a boy.” The downy, squirming bundle was placed in her arms and Esme felt tears rising, unbidden, to her eyes. He was absolutely perfect- with his tiny, scrunched face, miniscule fingers and toes, and wide, gaping mouth. She’d never known she could feel such immediate, overwhelming love for another living creature. She lowered her head to scant, damp blonde curls and held him close.