It was a warm June day when Roy and Barbara married in our backyard. His sons had brought an arbor and decorated it with fresh roses for the ceremony. The weather was gorgeous. “Picture perfect,” the photographer kept saying. For the first time in his life Roy was speechless. He looked scared to death. He mumbled his vows and everyone in attendance strained to hear him.
“Louder,” Roy’s son yelled.
Roy nodded his head and repeated them with gusto.
Emily sat next to Jasmine and held her hand throughout the ceremony. Roy’s daughter sang “Ave Maria” and when the minister said kiss the bride, Roy dipped Barbara and planted the longest recorded kiss in the history of wedding ceremonies. The men cheered and when Roy let Barbara up for breath he pumped his fist into the air. We all released balloons and Emily and Jasmine jumped from their seats, trying to catch the ones that were caught in the trees.
After the ceremony, Mark and Dad positioned themselves at the grill and didn’t move. Dad slathered the ribs with sauce and Mark monitored the blaze. Mom and I fluttered back and forth between the deck and the kitchen refilling bowls of pasta and potato salad, refreshing trays of fresh vegetables and fruit, and carrying out countless trays of appetizers. Everyone from the office was there and all of Roy’s and Barbara’s families. Our deck and backyard were filled. Emily wore a purple dress she had picked out at the store herself based on how much it twirled when she spun around.
My brother, Richard, and his family arrived late in the afternoon. They were going to be with us for the next four days. “I stopped at Mom and Dad’s house,” he said, hugging me. “I assumed they had to be here. Are we breaking up a party?”
“Not at all,” I said. “We didn’t expect you till later but this is better because now I can introduce you to everyone.” Emily stood behind me holding on to my waist as I hugged Nancy and their three boys. I hadn’t seen Richard in over a year. He was heavier but still looked good. He peeked around me to see Emily.
“Well, hello there,” he said, waving. “Patti, did you know you have something on your back?” Emily giggled and held tighter.
“There’s something on my back? Get it off,” I said, playing along. Richard pretended to pull Emily from me, grunting for effect.
“It won’t budge,” he said. “I think you’ll need an operation.” Emily laughed and let go. “Oh, no. It’s gone now.”
Emily lifted her dress and rose up on her toes, embarrassed.
Richard extended his hand. “Nice to meet you, Emily. I’m Richard, Patti’s brother. So that makes me your uncle.”
She smiled and twirled, looking at the ground.
“We’re so happy to have you as part of the family.”
She rocked back and forth on top of my feet.
“And since I’m officially your uncle that means I need a kiss. Can I have a kiss?”
She shook her head.
“You won’t give me a kiss?”
She laughed.
“If you won’t give me a kiss then I’ll have to steal one from you!” He lunged for her and she shrieked, running through the yard. Girl followed as Richard ran in circles trying to catch Emily.
I don’t know when Mark and I decided to adopt Emily. I think I knew we would the night I met her in her home and she crawled into my lap. Mark knew it when we decorated the tree. But we put the thought out of our minds and kept it at arm’s length. We were too old, too broken and too wounded to start another life. That’s what we thought, but I don’t think our hearts ever believed it. From the moment I turned the car around at Wesley House and drove home I knew I was in for the ride of my life. Once we became Emily’s legal guardians we knew there was no way we could ever let her go. She had made a place in our lives and although she didn’t look like us or have our blood in her veins, we loved her as our own. She was ours. We love her as we loved Sean, as if she were born to us. We set up her bed and framed pictures of her and her mother and put them on the dresser and hung them on the wall. We didn’t want her to forget her mother and we understood, as Lynn McSwain pointed out, that Emily might have special needs in the future as a result of Tracy’s death, but that’s okay. Mark and I had special needs, too. We were all in this together.
“Mommy!” I turned to see Emily’s feet in the air. Richard was pumping her up and down. Mark and I never told her to call us Mom and Dad; we never discussed it with her. It was easy for her to call Mark Dad because she never had one, but it took a few months before she called me Mom. I didn’t make a big deal of it in front of her but afterward I went into the bathroom and cried. We were a family.