Louie jumped up on the couch beside Holly. “Is that okay? Is he allowed on the furniture?”
“Okay by me, if it’s okay with you.”
Holly scooted closer to Steve to give Louie more room. She ran her fingers through Louie’s thick fur. The dog stretched out more, and she found herself smack up against Steve as she gave the dog more room. The dog slowly closed his eyes and gave a big sigh as she petted him. She was torn between totally immersing herself in how good it felt to have a dog curled up beside her again or trying to ignore how right it felt and how much she’d missed it.
“You okay?” Steve’s voice was deep and warm. He had a sneaky way of being in tune to her feelings. She wasn’t sure she liked it.
“Yes, I’m fine.” She then realized she was fine. She was tired of hiding and pushing thoughts and memories away. She petted Louie again and he gave one lazy tail thump on the couch.
“You want to talk about it?” Steve’s tone questioned, but didn’t really pry.
She realized, and it surprised her, that she did want to talk about it. She hadn’t really talked to anyone about it since it happened.
Since the funeral.
“It was last Christmas.” She wasn’t sure she could tell what happened, but she was going to try. For the first time ever. Lynn had always been her buffer. Explaining what had happened. Making phone calls. Being her front man—woman. Holly took a deep, steadying breath, her heart racing.
“We had a bad snow and ice storm. My husband, Dave and our dog, Tucker, were coming home from the hardware store. Dave wanted to put up more Christmas lights, and I told him it was silly to get out on the roads, but he insisted. Wanted our house to be all fixed up for Christmas. His parents were coming and we had just bought the house.” The familiar surge of pain washed over her and she had to stop and just breathe.
Steve waited patiently for her to continue.
Holly stared into the fire as the memories of that night came rushing back. “Dave was taking a long time, and I was starting to get worried. I stood at the window for such a long time. Wishing him to show up. I finally saw headlights in the drive, but it was the police. Dave had been killed instantly by a driver who lost control on the slick roads. Then they told me that Tucker was injured and was taken to the vet clinic. My vet clinic. The police drove me there. I so wanted to save Tucker, to save one of them, and the other vet— my best friend, Lynn— and I worked on Tucker. We just couldn’t save him. I lost both of them that night.”
Holly threaded her hand through Louie’s thick fur, burying her fingers in its warmth. “I was just numb by then. No tears. Just… so… tired. Lynn took me home to her house and I stayed there for days while she made all the arrangements.”
She turned and looked at Steve. His eyes held compassion and a knowing about loss. “My husband, Dave, was a vet, too. We worked together. After he… was gone… it was so hard everywhere. At home, at work. There was no escape. I sold the house and moved into an apartment. But I couldn’t avoid my work. He was still everywhere at work. I could picture him smiling at me in passing. The great way he had with the animals. I could hear his laugh. He was such a good man. I loved him so much. And Tucker. I missed them both so much. Everything was just so empty after that.”
“I’m so sorry, Holly.”
“Thank you.” She fell silent then, not sure what else to say. Hot tears trailed down her checks and she dashed her palms at them to wipe them away. It felt almost good, in a very strange way, to have finally spoken about that night. Cleansing in a way. She leaned against the back of the couch and stared into the dancing flames in the fireplace.
“So that’s why you’re not very big into Christmas this year.”
“I thought if I came here to Comfort Crossing, I could just avoid the holiday this year.”
“But Josh and I went and decorated your cottage. And Josh invited you over to help decorate our tree. Oh, and let’s not forget we invited you to the tree lighting ceremony. I’m sorry. I had no idea.”
“That’s okay. It was hard at first, especially when I first drove up to the cottage and saw all those Christmas lights. But, really, how can you not get caught up in Josh’s enthusiasm for the holidays? And who could help falling for Louie?”
The dog opened his eyes at the sound of his name and looked at her with a knowing, old soul glance. The dog pressed against her. Steve wrapped his arm around her and drew her close against him.
“Louie is a big pig when it comes to sharing a couch.” Steve grinned down at her.
“I can see that.”