The CEO's Little Surprise(29)

       
           



       

"My offer to buy your formula is legitimate and legal. And I didn't  bring up extending our affair because of it," he told her truthfully.

Maybe the affair had started as a way to make sure the odds fell in his  favor. But that had changed a long time ago. She had their relationship  all wrong-the first one and the second one-and somehow he was the bad  guy in all of this. As though she'd had expectations of him that he'd  stomped all over and God forbid he be given a second chance.

"Then why?" she pushed, her expression darkening more with each passing  second. "Why keep seeing each other? Why not end it like you always  do?"

Because...he had all these feelings he didn't know what to do with.  Because he liked being around her. Because he couldn't imagine saying  goodbye.

But all at once, he couldn't spit that out. Heaviness weighed down his  chest. If they didn't say goodbye, what then? He wasn't marriage  material.

"Yeah, that's what I thought," she said derisively when he didn't  answer her. "You haven't changed. You're another broken heart waiting to  happen."

Another broken heart? Something snapped inside.

All this time... Cass had been in love with him. And he'd broken her  heart because he'd ended their relationship, despite never making any  promises. No wonder she'd been so frosty and uptight at first.  Obviously, their past had colored her agenda and explained why he could  never put his finger on what she was up to. Why he could never find his  balance with her.

"Are you still in love with me?" he demanded.

She laughed but it sounded forced and hollow. "Boy, someone sure packed  their industrial-sized ego for this trip down memory lane. What do you  think?"

That cool exterior was a front, one she did better than he'd credited, but he knew the Cass underneath it. Very well.

Sarcasm meant he'd hit a nerve.

"I think you didn't deny it." Eyes narrowed, he evaluated her.

Of course, that question would remain unanswered because, at the end of  the day, she didn't trust him. And he was still angry about it. The  unfounded accusations about Rebecca Moon still stuck in his craw and he  was having a hard time getting them loose. "I guess I should have ended  things. Especially if you're convinced I'm out to steal from you."

"It doesn't matter," she cut in swiftly. "We both know your interest in  me starts and ends with my formula. So I'll make it easy for you.  This...whatever it is...is over."

So that was it? Because of how things had ended between them the first  time, she chose to believe that he was involved in the leak and didn't  have any intention of listening to him. She was operating under a  decade-old hurt and refused to give him an opportunity to explore what  he wanted this time. That was crap and he was calling her on it.

"What if I asked you to extend our relationship because I want to see  what happens when we don't end things right away? It's totally unfair of  you to say adios when I'm genuinely trying to figure this out. Almost  as unfair as accusing me of being involved in the leak with literally no  proof."

She stared at him, her eyes huge and troubled. "Yeah, well turnabout is  fair play, Gage. Spend the next decade thinking about that."





Thirteen

Gage drove back to Austin, his mind a furious blur. Cass had found the  ultimate way to get him back for breaking her heart-by accusing him of  betraying her.

Turnabout is fair play.

If it had happened to anyone else, he'd have appreciated the irony.

As it was, his chest ached with unprocessed emotions. If it wasn't for  the layer of mad, he might understand what had just happened. But he  couldn't get the heaviness in his chest to ease or the anger to abate.  She hadn't believed him when he said he wasn't involved. Because she  didn't trust him.

In Cass's mind, he was guilty simply because he hadn't fallen to one  knee and declared undying love. Stealing a competitor's secrets was  apparently as much a crime to her as not proposing. It was ridiculous.  He cared about Cass. Of course he did. Who suggested they keep seeing  each other? Gage. Who had called Cass when he'd been at his absolute  lowest? Still him. Didn't she get that he'd been falling for her all  along and had kind of freaked out about it?                       
       
           



       

Obviously not.

He'd given as best as he knew how. And his best wasn't good enough.

Fine. That was the way it should be, anyway. Clearly this relationship  business wasn't for him. But what if that meant he couldn't be a father  either? What if he was completely flawed in some way?

Gage spent the remainder of the drive home nursing his wounds and then  drowned them in a quarter of a bottle of Jack Daniel's. He tried to go  to bed, where it smelled like Cass and everything good and hopeful in  his life, and that was the breaking point.

He vaulted out of bed, scaring the bejesus out of Arwen, who was  enjoying the rare treat of sleeping at Gage's feet. Head cocked at a  curious angle, she watched him throw on jeans but elected to stay put  when Gage stormed from the room.

Twisting open the whiskey again, he got started on what was probably a  vain attempt to drink enough to forget the stricken look on Cass's face  when she'd said this is over.

He'd hurt her. He got that. But it had happened a long time ago. This  was all on her and her inability to forgive and forget. There was no  reason for Gage to reevaluate anything, yet here he was, doing it  anyway.

He groaned and let his head fall into his hands. Who was he kidding? He'd screwed up, too.

Whether it was fair, whether he'd made mistakes with Cass due to his  unquenchable desire to best his competition, whether Robbie made his  life unduly complicated-none of that mattered. He'd lost something  precious and he missed her. Cass should be in his arms at this moment  and she wasn't and it sucked.

Before he dissolved into an unmanly puddle of regret, he palmed his  phone and flicked through pictures of Robbie. The boy's face was so  reminiscent of Gage's brother, it was almost eerie. Genetics. That's all  it was, not a message from beyond the grave.

He's going to be a handful.

Gage smiled. Yeah, his son was pretty great. What did Nicolas know  about kids, anyway? It was a sobering thought. His brother had guided  him for so long. Who would be the voice of his conscience now that Gage  was moving toward something new and different?

You'll figure it out. After all, you already know what not to do.

He definitely knew that. Gage would raise Robbie with no boundaries.  Carpe diem and full speed ahead, unlike how his own parents had raised  him. If Robbie wanted to run with scissors, Gage would put plastic tips  on the sharp ends and lead the way. If Robbie wanted to climb trees-or  mountains-Gage would be behind him every step, ready to catch him when  he fell.

He'd say yes to every "Hey, Dad, can I...?"

Mom and Dad didn't put restrictions on you to keep you from having fun.

Yeah, he knew that. They loved Gage, fiercely, even to this day,  despite their disappointment that none of Gage's childhood limitations  had resulted in a son who played it safe. He lived his life  unapologetically, reveling in all the experiences Nicolas couldn't.

Like falling in love?

Gage drained the highball and flipped it over instead of refilling it  like he wanted to. When his conscience came up with gems like that, it  was time to lay off the sauce.

Except the thought wouldn't go away.

For his entire adult life, he'd avoided anything that smacked of  permanence. Even with Cass, who made him feel alive and amazing and as  though he wanted to be around her all the time. He couldn't just come  out and commit. Why?

Because he feared losing someone who mattered-like his parents had.  God, why hadn't he ever realized that? With Robbie, it had been easy.  There hadn't even been a choice in his mind. But he had control over  whether he committed to Cass and he'd exercised it by walking out the  door instead of fighting for what he wanted.

You live life to the extreme but it costs you. You have no personal  relationships. No one to lean on. What are you going to do when  parenting gets hard?

Gage frowned. His parents were moving here. His mom would give him advice.

The same woman you just vowed not to emulate when raising your son?  Good thinking. Besides, don't you want someone to be there for you who  gets you? Who's your equal? Someone you can count on and vice versa?

"Shut up, already. I get it," he muttered. "I messed up with Cass and  instead of figuring out how to fix it, I'm sitting here arguing with a  ghost."