The Butterfly Box(183)

She put the key in the lock and wriggled it about in frustration. When it wouldn’t turn she rang the bell. When Arthur didn’t come down she shouted

up at the window. Then to her horror the light extinguished in the bedroom, leaving her alone in the empty street, blinking up in fear at the sudden realization that he must know. Somehow he knew. Or he had simply had enough. ‘Arthur!’ she shouted in panic. ‘Arthur!’ But the house remained silent and impenetrable. ‘Arthur, let me in!’ she choked. She shouted until her voice was hoarse, until the cold wall of the house echoed her pleas only to mock her. She sunk to the ground and crumpled into sobs. Arthur’s patience had finally snapped.

Arthur watched through the gap in the curtains as his wife finally retreated to her car and drove off into the night. His throat ached from suppressing his emotions and his heart thumped behind his ribcage because he knew that by shutting her out he risked losing the one woman he had ever loved. But he also knew that he couldn’t continue being taken for granted. He had been pushed to the limit. She had gone too far. It was time to win back her respect. She needed space to recognize that what she had with him was something precious, something sacred, something to be nurtured, not worn away out of carelessness and complacency.



He slumped on the side of the bed and dropped his head into his hands.

Hal had drifted away from Federica. She was married now and her life no longer ran parallel to his. So he was surprised when she called him soon after Nuno’s funeral and asked him for lunch in London during the university holidays. ‘I need to see you, Hal,7 she said and her voice sounded different. Hal was relieved to get out of his mother’s house. She was crowding him out with her incessant questions and her unspoken demand to be included in his life. She wanted to know every detail about Exeter, who his friends were, whether he had a girlfriend, what he did in the evenings. He found her attention at once gratifying and invasive. It suffocated him.

Arthur watched him prowl around the house like one of the living dead and decided that at last he was growing up and growing away. But he didn’t like his pallor or his disquiet.

Hal met Federica in Le Caprice. He noticed that in the space of a couple of months she had lost considerable weight. She noticed how thin and pale he was. ‘You look dreadful, Hal. What on earth is going on?’ she asked, ordering a bottle of still water.

‘A Bloody Mary for me,’ said Hal. ‘I’m fine. You look well.’

Thank you.' she replied. ‘I’m getting myself under control.' she added proudly. She had lost almost a whole stone.

‘Good for you. This lunch is on you, right?’

‘Right.’



‘Good, let’s order, I’m famished,’ he said, opening the menu.

‘How’s Mama?’

‘Fine, I suppose. Annoying as usual.' he muttered.

Toby and Julian?’

‘Why don’t you ask them yourself? You never go down and see them.’ ‘There’s been so little time.’

‘Sure.’

‘Really.’

‘I’ll have a steak and chips,’ he said, closing the menu.

‘You don’t look as if you eat steak and chips. You look as if you’ve got an eating disorder.’

‘For God’s sake, you sound like Mama.' he complained. ‘Anyway, what’s this lunch for? I can’t believe it’s just a social.’

‘It is a social. I haven’t seen you properly in years.’

‘Not my fault.’

‘No, it’s not. But I need your help too.’

‘What?’ he sighed, rolling his eyes. She had intended to tell him about her father’s note, but he was so hostile and aloof she changed her mind.

‘I need you to get Abuelita’s telephone number from Mama,’ she said.

‘Why can’t you get it yourself?’

‘Because I don’t want her to know I want it,’ she explained. ‘All you need to do is look it up in her book, it's sure to be there.’

‘Why don’t you want her to know? Abuelita is your grandmother.’

‘And Papa’s mother,’ she said. ‘Hal, don’t be so naive. Mama hasn’t spoken to her in years, literally. She hates Papa. She hated it when he wrote to us.’

To you,’ he snapped. ‘He never wrote to me.’

‘Whatever. It's just better to do it secretly, believe me.’

‘It’ll cost you.’

‘What?’

‘Yes, it will,’ he said resolutely.

‘You’re not serious?’

‘Of course I am,’ he insisted coolly. ‘What do I get out of it otherwise?7