“OK, I deserve that.” Yes you do, you deserve that and more. “This is not easy for me either Jemma, I love you so much, I love your brother and your mother as well.”
How dare he talk about my mother as if he was not the one to take her from this world. But then again, wasn’t that why I was here? To find out what pushed him over the edge causing the total destruction of what was left of our family?
“I’m listening. I am going to sit here and listen to you. When we are done, I am going to walk that door and I don’t want to ever see you again.”
I am not sure why I bothered to tell him. I could have just sat quietly while he went on his merry way spouting off broken I love you’s but I had to reassure him, reassure myself. With uncertainty he nodded in my direction and continued.
“All I ask is that you listen. Jem, I know what you remember of that night. When they played that video tape and I heard what a monster you thought I was my heart broke into. I knew so much of that night was skewed inside your precious little head but I would rather you think me a monster than remember whatever shook you so hard.”
My father stopped speaking and turned to his doctor as if asking for assurance. “Continue John. It’s OK.”
My father then returned his attention to me but before he could speak we were interrupted by the ringing of Dr. Scott’s cell phone.
“Will the two of you excuse me for a moment? There is an emergency in the front office. I will be back shortly.”
Dr. Scott stood up and walked out of the room leaving me alone with my father and who I can only assume was his bodyguard.
“So is he your bodyguard or something?” I asked.
My dad smiled. “No, he is here to make sure I don’t strangle myself...or Peter.”
“Peter?” I asked.
“Dr. Scott.” Ah.
A few moments later Dr. Scott returned to the room looking a little bit out of sorts.
“So, well, it seems there is a young man here for you Mrs. Hale. He was rather insistent that he be by your side. Julian he said his name was.”
“Julian?” My father and I both said in unison.
“Yes, I am going to go out on a limb here and guess that this is “the” Julian?”
My father turned to me anxiously awaiting confirmation.
“Yes, Julian Ackles.” I said to my father.
“Do you want him here?” My father asked.
I know I had ran off to see my dad on my own but now that he was sitting in front of me I wasn’t sure I could handle it without Julian by my side. He was so angry with me when he walked away this afternoon that I could not imagine why he bothered to come after all. Not that the reason mattered. He was here and that spoke volumes to me.
I nodded at my father and he nodded back at me understanding my need without words just like he had done so many times with my mother.
“Let him in. I don’t mind if he is here. I would prefer it actually.” He said.
“Very well, then.” Dr. Scott pressed the button on the desk. “Send the young man in.” he mumbled into the air.
A moment later, Julian stepped into the room, his eyes first falling to my father and then to me. I stood up in front of my chair and then desperation took over as he ran to my side and threw his arms around me as if nobody but us were in the room.
“I am so sorry sweetheart! When I got back to the room and saw your note my stomach dropped into the pit of my stomach. I know you said you wanted to see him alone but I could not bear the fact that you took off without knowing how much I loved you. I forgive you. I forgive you over and over again.” He said wrapping his hand through my hair and kissing me softly on the lips.
When he reached up I grabbed the hand that was still on my face. “I love you so much Julian.” Julian kissed me again and then took notice of my left hand.
“You’re wearing it?”
Yes I was because even though I had never uttered the word the answer was yes, yes to every second, every minute, and every hour of our lives. Julian smiled with his usual confident smile and it made my heart dive.
“Well, I hate to interrupt such a lovely reunion but we really should continue. If you will both have a seat.”
Julian pulled out my chair and sat down beside me. I looked to my father and found him smiling, tears once again pooling into his eyes.
“Good to see you again Julian.”
With his jaw set in a straight tight line Julian simply nodded. I am sure he had a million things that he would like to get off his chest but because he loved me those would have to wait for another day.
“Continue John.”
“Yeah well, like I said, I saw the videotaped statement and I knew that I could not see you hurt by the truth so I decided to plead guilty.