Her voice was just a buzz of sound now, but even through the anger churning within, he could see that Colleen clearly believed that she'd scored a point. That she'd made Sage see his father as the caring, thoughtful, generous man she thought he was. That she'd found a way past the old angers and hurts. But instead, all she had done was relight the fuse that had been smoldering for years.
He took a breath and interrupted her stream of conversation. "Yeah. He was proud. Too damn proud. And he wasn't the kindhearted, feeble old gentleman you think you knew."
"What are you talking about?"
He threw a glance at the open shed door and the ranch yard beyond. Golden sunlight washed over his ranch, making the inside of the shed seem even darker in comparison. But damned if he'd have this talk out in public so that anyone could overhear. He strode across the straw-littered floor, slammed the door and threw the lock. Only then did he turn around to face Colleen again, and in the back of his mind, he noted that her eyes were wary.
"You met J.D. when he was old and tired and looking to find the fast track into heaven," Sage finally said and had the small satisfaction of seeing her blink in surprise. "I knew him back in the day and trust me, he wasn't a sweetheart. He was domineering, a know-it-all and damned arrogant with it."
One dark blond eyebrow lifted. "Remind you of anyone?"
He snorted in spite of the anger bubbling into an ugly brew in the pit of his stomach. "Okay, I can accept that maybe I picked up a few of his less pleasant traits along the way. But I never-" Damn. The words were stuck in his throat like bitter bile. He hadn't talked about this in years. And he'd never told anyone else about this. Not Dylan. Not Angie. The only person he had ever been open with about it was J.D. Because the old man himself was at the heart of it.
Shaking his head fiercely, as if he could dislodge the blackness wrapped around his memories, he muttered, "You said he wanted me to stay in college. That he told you he talked me into it."
"That's what he said, yes."
"Well, then, he had a really selective memory," Sage said flatly. "Because he didn't talk me into anything. He maneuvered me until he got his way. Just like he did everything else in his life."
"What do you mean, maneuvered?"
He hadn't meant to allow old memories to nearly choke him as they rushed up from the black bottom of his heart to spill through his mind like tar. But there they were, and he'd come too far to stop now.
"Unlike J.D., I never figured that I knew best how another man should live his life. I never made it my business to take something from a person just because I could."
"What are you talking about?"
"I was in college. My sophomore year. Twenty years old and I figured I had all the answers." He pushed one hand through his hair and tipped his head back to look up through the skylight at the cloud-scudded sky. Even with his age-old fury pushing his words, they caught in his throat and had to be forced out. But if he was going to say it, he was going to look into those oh-so-innocent eyes that saw only the good in people. That way he could be a witness when she finally had to admit that J.D. was nothing like she'd thought he was.
"What happened?" The concern in her voice was as real as the touch of her hand on his arm. The electrical whip of heat that sliced through him did battle with the anger and lost.
He snorted. "What happened? J.D. happened. I went home one night and told him that I was leaving school."
"Why?"
His gaze speared into hers. "I was in love. Or at least I thought I was. I told J.D. we were going to get married and start up my ranch."
Her voice was soft and uncertain as she asked, "What did he say?"
"Oh," Sage said on a sharp bark of laughter, "J.D. said all the right things. Told me he'd help me get into the inheritance my parents left me. Wasn't much," he added, "but it would've given me a start."
"That's good though, isn't it?" Her eyes were shimmering with hurt and he didn't know if it was for him or herself. "J.D. said he'd help you."
"Yeah, and then the next day, when I got to my girlfriend's place, her roommate told me she was gone and wouldn't be back." Amazing, Sage thought, that it could still hurt after all these years. That the betrayal was as sharp. The fury as thick.
"Why would she leave?"
He looked at her and quirked one eyebrow, inviting her to fill in the blanks. When she didn't, he did it for her. "She left me a note. Told me that it had been fun, but she was moving to Paris to paint. And she wasn't supposed to let me in on it, but apparently she didn't mind turning on J.D., either, because she told me in the note that he'd paid her two hundred thousand bucks to leave."
* * *
Colleen looked up at him, and for the first time in her life, didn't have the slightest clue what to say. This J.D. was not the man she had known. How could he have hurt his son so badly? And while her heart hurt for Sage, there was pain for herself, as well.
Sage had been in love. He'd wanted to get married. And though it was years ago, a part of her ached hearing the words.
He scrubbed both hands across his face. "I called him on it right away and he was furious that Megan had told me what he'd done." He shook his head and choked out another laugh. "He didn't see anything wrong with what he'd done, of course, but he was pissed as hell that I'd found out about it. Told me he'd done it for my sake. That Megan wasn't the kind of woman to stand by a man-"
She opened her mouth and he spoke quickly to cut her off.
"-before you can say it, yeah, he was right about Megan. If she had loved me, she never would have taken the money. But he should have let me find out the truth about her myself. Instead, he charged in, just like always, and rearranged the world to suit himself."
Megan was a fool. An idiot. She'd had this proud, strong, yes, arrogant man's love and she'd sold it. Colleen would never have betrayed him. She would have been proud to have his love, to work with him to build a ranch, a legacy for the family they would build and-
Colleen's throat closed up. All of a sudden she couldn't breathe. Couldn't stop the sting of tears in her eyes. What on earth was wrong with...
Oh, God. She was in love.
For the first time in her life, she was madly, completely, passionately in love with a man who probably would never return the feeling. The realization staggered her and if she hadn't had the workbench behind her as a brace, she might have just slumped to the floor. How was she going to get past this feeling? How could she possibly be in love with a man who wanted nothing to do with love and family? Who believed that love meant betrayal?
Sage was still talking and she forced herself to listen. He didn't need to know what she was feeling, that her heart was breaking. What he needed was to get past the old pain still gnawing on him. "Sage..."
"Forget it. You can't say anything, Colleen. J.D. was a bastard. End of story."
Her own feelings didn't matter right now, she told herself. What did matter was the pain Sage was still in. She couldn't bear seeing him cling to old injuries that were only hurting him, keeping him from moving on, and understanding that though his father had treated him badly, it wasn't because he hadn't loved him.
Colleen moved in closer, laid one hand on his chest and said, "What he did was terrible, you're right. But he did it because he loved you."
"Hell of a way to prove it," he muttered. "He betrayed me, bottom line. And so did Megan, though in the long run, she did me a favor."
"Can't you say J.D. did, too?"
He snorted. "Don't know that I'm ready to thank him. But looking back, I can see that I mistook lust for love and I'm guessing J.D. saw that more clearly than I did back then." He blew out a breath and Colleen saw the anger fade from his eyes as he began to let go of the past. "I can say that if he hadn't stuck his nose in, I might not be standing here in front of a woman who turns my blood to fire with a look."
Instantly, Colleen's whole body lit up as if a sudden fever erupted inside her. She loved him. She wanted him. She stared into his eyes and knew that though he might not love her back, his desire was real and every bit as powerful as her own. "Sage..."
"I'm done talking about J.D. right now, Colleen," he murmured, dropping both hands to the workbench on either side of her, pinning her in place. "I've been trying to stay away from you-"