She knew this wouldn't be enough to satisfy his inquisitive little mind though and, sure enough, four seconds later he asked, ‘Why?'
‘Because that's what grown-ups do sometimes.'
‘Why?'
Oh farts!
‘Because they sometimes live apart to see if they miss each other. You see, when they get married, they want to make sure they live happily ever after.'
‘"Happily" is an adverb, isn't it?'
‘Yes, Danny,' said Stevie, seizing him and putting him on her knee and cuddling him tightly. ‘Yes, "happily" is an adverb.'
She put him to bed after reading him The Useless Troll yet again. He knew what the ending was and still delighted in hearing the gruesome ‘sting'. Stevie wished she knew what the ending to her story was, and whether it was one she could look forward to with as much enthusiasm, although she also hoped her ending would be less hideous. Then again, with her luck, it would probably be worse.
Admittedly, she had not done a thing as regards finding somewhere else to live. The thought of leaving Matt's house was awful, but she knew she must – and soon. It would be far better, she supposed, to play the game and make all the necessary arrangements and then have to cancel them at the eleventh hour when Matthew came to his senses than dither and risk Danny and her being thrown forcibly out. That wouldn't exactly help any future reconciliation plans.
It had been Matthew who had badgered her to move in with him, with the ‘two could live as cheaply as one' philosophy, although she had ended up paying most of the bills and the mortgage since she'd been there. She had even cleared a few of his arrears, thanks to a nice profit from the sale of her old house. She had also recently paid for her own wedding dress, Matthew's wedding suit (which cost more than her whole outfit, accessories included), Catherine's bridesmaid dress, Danny's pageboy outfit, the rings and the deposits on the reception, flowers and honeymoon. At least the money for the balances was safe in her own account, thank goodness.
Matthew's plans to contribute were tightly bound up in procrastinations, not that she minded because life with someone was about sharing, wasn't it? After Mick, she had thought she would never trust anyone enough again to unlock the door to her heart and throw it open. Until Matthew. Maybe she should have realized she wasn't destined for happiness and that keeping the chain on might have been a safer option.
So Stevie settled down with a coffee and the Properties section of the local newspaper. Buying somewhere wasn't an option at this stage, just in case Matthew came to his senses and asked her to come back, so, as far as rental accommodation went, it had to be somewhere nearby for Danny's school, which ruled out most of the houses available. Of those that were geographically suitable, one was a seven-bedroomed barn conversion and the other a one-bedroomed flat in an infamous drug-riddled street. Of course, the cottage across the lane was featured, as always, but the bond alone was enough to have most people voicing the message to the landlord, ‘Hope the sun shines for yer, mate!'
Stevie made a mental note to ring some estate agents very soon, but the thought filled her with dread and she knew she was stalling, waiting for a miracle to rescue her. The miracle that was, unbeknown to her then, just around the corner.
Chapter 15
Jo was drying her hair at the dressing-table after a dribbling shower. Matthew watched her fondly, the expression of a love-struck Labrador pup on his face.
‘What's the matter?' she said, catching his eye.
‘Nothing, I'm just looking at you.'
‘Well, stop it,' she said, and carried on wafting the hairdryer and trying to pretend that she wasn't being scrutinized quite so thoroughly.
Coming up behind her, he planted a kiss on her neck.
‘Not now,' she said, wriggling away. ‘I'm late for work.'
‘We're late for work,' he said, ‘but at least we can occupy a car-sharing parking space. They're always in plentiful supply.'
‘Great,' said Jo sarcastically, which made his little Tigger bouncing heart deflate a little.
‘You okay?' he said.
‘Well, no actually,' she said, winding the cord around the hairdryer as if she was wrapping it around someone's neck. ‘I don't enjoy living out of a suitcase one bit. I just want to move into your house as soon as possible.'
‘I know it's hard, sweetie,' said Matthew sympathetically because he recognized that it was a lot easier for a bloke living in a hotel room than a girl with all her essential accoutrements. ‘We'll be in there soon enough.'
‘How soon is "soon"?'
‘Well, I have to give Stevie a few days at least.'
‘Of course,' said Jo, putting down the hairdryer and coming over for a snuggle. ‘I'm sorry, I'm being selfish even asking. Forgive me, it's just that if I think too much about Stevie, I'll start to feel awful. I know she didn't deserve what we did to her and that's what makes this so hard. I betrayed my friendship with her to get you, and the awful thing is that I would do it all over again if I had to. It doesn't make me feel very good about myself. Sorry. This must be a terrible time for Stevie. I've been trying to think of what we could do to make all this easier for her.'
Matthew's arms closed around her tightly. Building a relationship on the ruins of another wasn't what either of them had wanted, but it had happened. The whole Stevie thing had brought tears to Jo's eyes many times, because neither of them were the sort of sick people who went around hurting others for fun. It was just that when love like this called, you didn't hide and pretend you were out, you flung open the door, invited it right on in to sit in your most comfortable chair and fed it your best tin of biscuits.
Jo sighed and rubbed the back of her long, swan-like neck.
‘I'm so stressed out. I'm waiting for Adam's next move and I just want to be safe in your house with you rather than in some place where he could easily get to me if he wanted.'
‘I understand,' he said, rubbing her shoulders and making her purr. ‘I'll ring her later and push her along a bit.'
‘What if she starts playing "not answering the phone" games?'
‘Then I'll call round,' although he didn't want to.
‘Maybe she'll be at the wedding tomorrow – you can ask her outright then.'
‘The wedding?'
‘Yes. Will and Pam's wedding,' said Jo.
‘You are joking. I can't go to that now!' said Matthew, shaking his head.
‘Whyever not?'
‘Well, they're more Stevie's and your ex's friends than mine and yours for a start.'
‘Don't be silly,' said Jo. ‘I'm sure you and I were invited on our own merits and not just as "plus ones". Don't put yourself down like that. You knew Will from the gym, didn't you, before you even met Stevie . And I've met Pam and Will a couple of times and got on very well with them.'
‘Well, I suppose,' conceded Matthew weakly.
‘Plus I've bought a new suit I have every intention of wearing.'
He didn't look convinced so she came at him from another angle.
‘Matthew, the sooner Stevie sees us as a couple, the sooner she'll realize it's over for you and her. She has to know.'
‘Stevie won't go to the wedding. I'd put my life savings on her not going after all that's happened.'
He knew Stevie too well. She wouldn't want to face the world at the moment. At least he hoped he was right, because he didn't want her turning up, going all Glenn Close, and making a scene.
‘So, what's the problem?'
‘Well, I'm thinking about Adam.'
‘Matthew,' began Jo with a dry laugh. ‘I have no intention of hiding away. I'm not the one that wrecked my relationship – I've got nothing to be ashamed of.'
‘We don't have to go. I'm sure we wouldn't be missed if we didn't turn up. You and I could do something special together instead.'
‘People have to know some time that we're an item, Matthew! Stevie will be far less hurt thinking tomorrow is our starting-point. We're both free agents now, aren't we? No one can say it's wrong for us to be a couple now.'
‘Well … er … ' started Matthew, who hadn't actually spelt it out to Stevie yet that he wasn't coming back, but Jo wasn't listening. Her brain had run on ahead.
‘It's fairer on Stevie in the long run. Okay, it won't be very nice for her at the beginning, but as soon as she knows you have found someone else, the healing process will kick in for her.'