Leah shook her head, but she had that grin on her face that sent little bolts of warmth pinging through his heart. They switched positions, and he helped coach her through the series of breathing exercises. He had to admit after trying a few himself he did feel better. How it would possibly make Leah feel better when she was trying to push a human being out of her nether regions was something he still didn't understand. But, hey, if it made her feel better to learn, he was there for her.
Marcus wandered back in toward the end of the class, full of apologies, and took his place on the other side of Leah. The teacher went through a few final tips including info about something called an epidural. Brooks leaned over to Leah. "I think this is about drugs, take notes."
She rolled her eyes and slapped his shoulder but, hey, he wasn't kidding. If he was in her position, there was no way in hell he would be trying have that kid without a solid dose of anything they could give him.
"Natural childbirth would be best, I think," Marcus said. "Much healthier for the baby."
Leah and Brooks stared at him. Brooks finally said, "As Leah is the one pushing the baby out of her vagina, I think whether or not she takes drugs to make it less excruciating is up to her."
She held up her hand and he high-fived her.
Marcus held up his hands in surrender. "Of course, of course. I'm just trying to do what's best for our child."
"Don't listen to him," Brooks whispered to her. "They wouldn't let you do it if it was going to hurt the baby. I'll get you all the drugs you want."
She laughed and shushed him.
Then it was question-and-answer time. He rolled one of the huge bouncy balls over and sat on it. It was surprisingly comfortable. And bouncy. He might have to get one for the office.
Several of the women had questions about things like stretch marks and what they could do to prevent them.
"Well," the teacher said, "there's cocoa butter and some other special creams that you can use. Your partner can help apply them every night."
"I can do that," Brooks said to Leah. "Not a problem." In fact, rubbing her down with lotion every night featured prominently in several of his more erotic dreams. If she wanted to prevent some stretch marks, he was all over that.
Marcus's eyes narrowed slightly at that, but it wasn't like he could complain. Leah was technically Brooks's wife.
"It's also a good idea to begin to prepare your perineum," the teacher said. "This can be done using some olive oil, massage oil, or whatever you have on hand. And you lightly massage, like so." She demonstrated with her fingers.
Brooks leaned over to Leah. "I am totally down to help with that."
She giggled, but shushed him again.
"What about sex?" another woman asked.
"Excellent question, excellent," Brooks said, nudging Leah. "Take notes on this one, too, please."
Her face turned red, but he was sure it was because she was trying to hold in a laugh.
"Well, most of you ladies are in your second or third trimesters. I know for those in their second trimester in particular you've got those hormones kicking in. Most of you are probably starting to feel better, not so much morning sickness. It's something you should check with your physicians about if you are uncertain, but as long as your doctors clear you, you can have sex right up until you deliver. In fact, it's a good way to get labor started if you're a little over your due date. Just make sure you don't have intercourse after the water breaks. But up until that point, you should all be good to go. I know especially in that second trimester, sometimes those hormones can be pretty strong."
Brooks thumped his chest with his fist. "I'm ready and willing to take one for the team. You let me know. Anytime, anywhere. Those hormones hit, I'm right there for you. If I'm at work, you just call me right up."
He said that one a little louder than he meant, but most of the class was cracking up, Leah included, though she hid her face in her hand. Hey, they could laugh all they wanted. He was serious.
The class wrapped up and the teacher thanked everyone for coming. Marcus excused himself to go interrogate the instructor a bit more. Kiss-ass.
Brooks got off his exercise ball. "I'm getting a few of those for the house. They're insanely comfortable."
"You're killing me," Leah said, raising her hands.
He hauled her off the ground but kept her in his arms. "I wasn't kidding, you know. Creams, massage oils, hormones … I'm your guy."
She grinned at him. "I had no doubt."
He wrapped his arm around Leah's waist and nodded at the teacher on his way out the door.
"So, what did you think of your first Lamaze class?" Leah asked on the way to the parking lot.
"It was a bit more informative than I thought it would be," he said.
"And is that a bad thing?" she asked, laughing.
"When it comes to things like drug info and hormone surges, absolutely not. That fantastic video on the other hand … yeah that shit should come with a warning label."
She laughed again and he helped her into the car, struck again by how normal this all felt. It was a strange balancing act. One part of him felt like he was on a plane ready to be pushed out without a parachute. He was out of his element, in over his head, and absolutely did not belong in a committed relationship with a pregnant woman. The other part of him felt complete for the first time in his life.
Marcus caught up to them and leaned into the car to say good-bye to Leah. Once the door was closed he walked over to Brooks's side.
"You know, you and I are going to have to come to an understanding about all this."
"Meaning what?" Brooks said.
"Meaning, I realize she's your wife, but she's having my kid. I'm not going away. You've always been a screwup. Finding out you got married blew my mind. Picturing you around a kid … my kid … " He shrugged. "Just making sure you know I'm not going anywhere."
"You've made it painfully clear, Marcus. But right now, I'm going home. With my wife. So, if you'll excuse us … "
Marcus held his hands up and backed away a couple steps before smiling and turning to walk off. Brooks took a second or two to get a grip on the fury rushing through him before he climbed into the car beside Leah.
The fact that Marcus wasn't wrong made everything that had come out of his mouth so much worse. Brooks had never seriously entertained the thought that he might want to be someone's husband and father someday. He was a goofball and a screwup, which was all good and fine when he was on his own. It made people laugh, so at least he could bring a little humor to the world. It was another thing entirely when it was a question of someone depending on him. That was a responsibility he had never wanted. And yet, there he was.
He and Leah still hadn't discussed what would happen in the near future, and he wasn't sure he wanted to. If he brought up the topic, it might set things in motion that he wasn't ready for yet. And with Marcus there, it made the dynamic even more complicated. The thought of dealing with that jag-off for the rest of his life made Brooks want to hop on the next flight for Nowhere and disappear.
For the moment, though, he would keep going along as though they were the happy little family they were pretending to be.
Maybe if he was lucky they could go on pretending forever.
Chapter Eighteen
Brooks stood outside his apartment door staring at the knob.
Harrison leaned around his shoulder. "You've got to go in sometime, mate."
"I know."
Cole finally blew out a long breath. "Everybody move."
Brooks, Harrison, and Chris all stood out of the way to let the veteran daddy through.
"Have you ever been to a baby shower before?" Harrison asked Brooks.
"Seriously? What the hell is a baby shower anyway?"
"I don't think I want to know," Harrison said. "Is Marcus going to be here?"
"No, he had a big conference call or some other excuse. I didn't pay attention. Why?" Brooks asked.
Harrison shrugged. "This might have been one instance where having him around would have been handy, especially if it meant you didn't have to go."
The three men stood staring through the open doorway into an apartment that had been completely covered in pink.
Brooks looked at Harrison. "Hold me. I'm frightened."
Harrison snorted and pushed him inside. He and Chris followed behind Brooks, using him like a shield.
"The men are here," Izzy, Kiersten's old roommate and fellow lotto winner, said.
Brooks loosened up a little bit to see Izzy and their other friend Cass. He'd known them back when they used to work in the assistant pool at the office. Before they won the lotto with Kiersten. Since then they'd been traveling the world and having a great time.
Chris wandered over to Cass and gave her a quick kiss. Brooks and Harrison stared, mouths open.