Janine smirked. "I could call her something else. I have a long list of things I call her that I usually speak sotto voce. I could raise the volume of my voice when I use those names."
Roman chuckled and shook his head. "No, that's alright. As you were."
She nodded and walked to his door and then turned and looked at him. "I call her that only out of respect for you. She doesn't deserve that title."
Roman stared at Janine, and she turned and walked out of the door, closing it behind
her. He shook his head and went back to work.
The week passed and he hardly saw Denise; she was in a frenzy of activity, rushing about and getting ready for her big socialite party aboard the new yacht, which looked to be fancier than any yacht he had ever purchased before. The Captain had sent him the specs, and this one was grander, as well as being ecologically sound. That was one of Allen's major selling points to the Senator. It was green, and this Senator was the walking, breathing definition of green.
Janine had reminded Roman to go buy a new suit for the big event, and he'd gone shopping and found something he thought would work. He brought it back to the office, and having no one to try it on for at home or anywhere else, he took it to work to run it past Janine. Denise would only have criticized him, but Janine had good taste, and she would be honest without being vicious to him.
He pulled the trousers on and was standing in his office bare from the waist up as he wrestled with the buttons on the shirt when Janine walked in and stopped short, staring at him. "I don't think you'd better go to the party looking like that, but I also think the only person who would object would be your wife."
Roman looked at her in exasperation. "Janine! Please knock first!"
She nodded. "Well, normally I would, but you've got a special visitor here and I thought I'd send them right in to you."
"Janine! I can't see anyone right now, I'm half-" he stopped short and stared at the doorway, his shirt in his hands, as his mouth fell open in utter shock.
Janine moved aside as Cami walked in, pushing a pretty pink stroller in front of her. She looked up at Roman and gave him a little smile. "It's okay, I've seen it before."
The shirt fell from Roman's hands, but other than that, nothing in the room moved or made any sound for a long, long moment. Janine glanced back and forth between them. "Well, I've got things to do." She stepped out and closed the door behind her.
Roman tried to think; he tried to remember to breathe, tried to remember to move and speak, and slowly, as though he was thawing out. Finally, he was able to draw a breath.
"Aren't you going to say anything?" Cami asked, looking at him nervously.
He felt the blood moving in his legs again and he took slow steps toward her. "How... how is this happening? How are you here?"
The realization hit him and he gasped as tears stung his eyes. No one had ever made him feel as cherished and alive as this woman had made him feel, and she'd disappeared after their time together, with no word, no note, no contact at all for a whole year, and now suddenly she was standing in front of him. It was like he had woken up again and everything in his soul began to move once more, drawing him to her and setting him on fire with life once more.
He rushed to her and wrapped his arms around her, holding her close to him. "It's you!" he laughed through his tears. "It's you! I never thought I'd see you again. I thought it was all just a dream... it seemed so unreal as more time passed, and now you're here! You're..." He stopped talking and stepped back from her, looking at her as though she was the reason there was suddenly light in his life again. He leaned down to kiss her, but she turned away and he stopped, staring in confusion and then stepped backward.
"What's wrong?" he asked quietly.
She shook her head and laughed at him. "Can you see anything but me right now?"
He finally looked down and saw the stroller at her side and he stared anew.
It was a bassinet stroller, and the back was laid down while the top was pulled up in a canopy, so Roman had to walk around beside Cami to look down into it.
"What... what..." he whispered as his jumbled thoughts and emotions began to form some semblance of logic. “You... you had a baby?"
She shook her head. "No... Roman, we had a baby."
He could have been knocked over with a feather.
There was another long silence from him as this information sunk into his head. He was a father. He had a child. He had a daughter, by the looks of all the pink the baby was wrapped up in. Cami was back. Cami was standing in front of him, looking far more beautiful than he remembered in his dreams, and she was telling him that they had a child together.
"You should sit down." She said it gently, reaching for him and taking his hand. He held her hand in his, but he didn't move when she pulled a little on his arm. Instead, he looked down into the stroller and saw a precious baby with dark curls and chubby cheeks, a little button nose and beautiful dark pink lips. Her long eyelashes rested against her dark caramel skin and her fingers were curled around her blanket.
"I'm a father...." he whispered aloud, feeling amazed at the sound of it.
"Why didn't you ever tell me? Why didn't you let me know? I would have helped you; I would have wanted to be a part of all of it!" He turned to look at her and saw that she was smiling through silent tears. He reached out to her and wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close to him and rocking her as he closed his eyes. "You're here, you're real, and we have a daughter. I can't believe this at all, but I won't let go of it for anything."
She wrapped her arms around him too, and held him close, burying her face in his chest. She had faced so much alone without him. Now that he was holding her, it felt like he was taking his part of the weight from her, part of the burden and stress, his part of the joy and happiness, and his portion of all of the things that she had borne alone without him during the year they had been apart. It was profound for her and she wept and he held her.
She felt the feel of his skin against her cheek as she laid her face on his chest, and she closed her eyes, knowing that this was not a way for them to be. She picked her face up to look at him and he took her face in his hands and moved to kiss her again, but she turned away once more.
"No... we can't!" she whispered painfully.
He blinked at her. The last time she had been in his arms, they were making love. The last time she had been in his arms, they were making the baby that was sleeping beside them.
"What is it? You don't want me to touch you?" he asked in confusion.
She shook her head. "No, it's not that." She sighed. "You're still married, and I'm not your wife, or your lady; I'm just a woman you had an affair with once, and now we have a baby. I didn't know what to do for a long time, for the entire term of the pregnancy, really, but then after she was born, I knew I had to come up here to find you and tell you, to give you a chance to be a father to her, but you and I... we can only be friends.
“I'm not going to be your mistress, Roman. You aren't like that, and I'm not like that. Neither of us needs that in our lives, and our daughter deserves the best situation from both of us. That means we have to step up to the responsibilities of being the best parents we can be, which means that we can't be sneaking around together behind your wife's back.
“You're married, you're hers, and this baby is ours, and we are friends, and that's how it is, and that's how it's going to be. I'm just here so you can be around her." Cami spoke sadly, but truthfully, and he knew she was right.
He had no right at all to try to be more than friends with her, and he knew it deep down in his soul. "I'm sorry. I apologize. It's just... seeing you... it brought everything back for me, and I just wanted to... I needed to...." He looked down at his daughter, sleeping peacefully. "This isn't about us anymore, though, it's only about her." He looked up at Cami again. "I understand. I'm so sorry that you went through all of it alone. I promise to make it up to you." He turned and looked at her fully. "Are you still living in Los Angeles?"
She shook her head. "No, I'd like to try to find a place up here so we can raise her together. It's too much for me to try to do it on my own, and I don't want you to miss out on any of it."
"I'm here! I'm here. I'll help you. Never worry about that; never worry about it again." He walked over to door and opened it up, calling for Janine. Then he walked back over to the stroller and looked down at his daughter again.
"What's her name?" he asked softly, feeling the joy in him overflow and spread the smile on his face.
Cami walked toward him and looked down at their daughter. "Her name is Emma. Emma Bruce."
He looked up at her quickly. "You gave her my last name?" he grinned.
Cami smiled and laughed a little. "Of course I did; she's your daughter."
"How old is she?" he asked.
"She's two and a half months old," Cami said as their daughter began to stir and open her eyes. Cami leaned down and picked her up carefully. "Would you like to hold her?"
Roman nodded and grinned the biggest grin of his life as Cami placed the baby girl in his arms. She stared up at her father with big brown eyes; his brown eyes, they weren't as dark as her mother's eyes; and he felt like he could cry with joy forever.