The Billionaire's Dance(26)

"Jacob's fine. This has to do with us. I need to talk to you about our  relationship." Jessica felt her heart breaking in half as she watched  the shutters quickly close into place on her husband's face.

"Our relationship is fine." He didn't elaborate, just looked back down  at his computer screen, as if the discussion was over and there was no  need to interrupt his work any longer.

He absolutely didn't want to have the conversation. He knew it had been  coming for quite a long time. He didn't want to hurt her but he couldn't  lose her either. He was feeling more stress than he ever had in his  life.

"The thing is, our relationship isn't okay for me anymore," she  stressed. "Alex, I love you. I have been in love with you for a while  now and I can't live in this marriage, loving you with all my heart,  while wondering when you're going to walk out the door." She finished,  as a tear slipped down her cheek.

His heart warmed for a moment as she once again told him she loved him.  He refused to allow the warmth though and blocked his emotions. He would  reason with her, he would make things okay for them.

She'd been hopeful to get through the conversation with no tears. She  didn't want to appear weak and she didn't want him feeling sorry for  her. She wanted his love or nothing at all.

He looked at her with the same shuttered expression, although she'd  thought for a moment, he'd shown some warmth. She'd most likely imagined  it because he had a guarded look that wasn't going to change anytime  soon. He sat back in his chair for a full two minutes before finally  speaking.

"Jessica, I care for you greatly. You are an incredible mother and a  great wife. I'm comfortable with the way things are. I never wanted to  marry, because other than my parents and my brother, I haven't exactly  seen a lot of shining examples of lasting love. I know you want me to  say, ‘I love you,' but I can't. It's just not who I am. I'm giving you  everything I'm capable of."

His words were like knives stabbing her again and again. She didn't know  how it was possible to still be standing there. She pressed her hand  against her heart, pressing in. The pain was so deep; it felt as if  there was a gaping hole in her chest. She really thought her heart may  explode from the intensity of the pain coursing through her.

"I understand Alex but then I can no longer stay married to you. You are  an amazing father and I would never keep Jacob from you again. We'll  have to work out all the details but I just can't do this. I'm so  sorry." She turned and walked from the room. She was choking on the sobs  that wanted to rip from her body but she managed somehow to hold them  back.

Jessica didn't know how she arrived in the bedroom she'd shared with  Alex for almost a year. Their nights had been amazing. That was the only  time he'd completely let down his guard. When he'd looked into her  eyes, she'd convinced herself it was love shining through their blue  depths.

She turned away from the bed. She couldn't look at it. She walked across  the hall and checked in on Jacob. He was sound asleep in his crib and  looked so peaceful. He'd grown so much his first year of life. She was  amazed how beautiful he was.

She loved how much he resembled his father. She rubbed his small, mostly  bald head. He didn't wake up. He was content in his crib. She wouldn't  disturb him right then. She would pick him up the next day.

She knocked on Julia's door and it was quickly answered. "Hi Jessica, is  everything okay?" she asked with real concern. Obviously, Jessica  thought, she wasn't doing a very good job of hiding her emotions.

"Everything is fine. I just wanted to let you know I'll be gone this  evening. You have my number if Jacob wakes and there are any problems."

"I'm sure things will be fine. Are you sure you're okay?" Julia asked again.         

     



 

"Yes, thanks, I will see you in the morning." With that Jessica turned  and walked back into her bedroom. There was no way she could sleep there  that night. She would go find a hotel room and then look for something  more permanent the next day. Her son would be fine overnight. She would  make sure she was back before he woke up. She packed an overnight bag  and slipped out of the house.

As she climbed into her car she had to wait a few moments because she  was crying so hard she couldn't see to drive properly. When she finally  pulled herself together and her vision cleared she turned away from the  house. She watched it in her rearview mirror until the trees blocked her  view.

Leaving was about the hardest thing she'd ever done. The further she got  from the house, the more she was regretting the decision. She loved  Alex so much and leaving him was even more painful than staying with  him, even without his love.

She decided to turn around and head back towards the house, when her car  was suddenly filled with bright lights. "What..." she began to say  aloud, when there was a huge crashing sound and she blacked out.





Alex sat as his desk with his head in his hands. He was already  regretting his words to Jessica. The longer he thought the more he  realized she wasn't demanding anything of him that he didn't have to  give.

All thoughts of work were gone. He was thinking back to his time with  Jessica. He couldn't wait to walk in the door each evening to see her.  He noticed throughout his days, he would continually check the time,  counting down the hours until he could return home. He'd done far more  work from home, than he'd ever done in the past. Anything that didn't  require him to be in the office was done from home.

He was also delegating far more work than he'd ever done in the past. He  just wanted to spend time with his son and his wife. Work was no longer  the top priority to him it used to be.

Their nights were unlike anything else he'd ever known. She was always  eager to fall into his arms. She was the most beautiful creature he'd  ever known. He could picture her pregnant with many more of his  children. He couldn't picture his life without her.

His heart seemed to grow too full for his chest, as the realization hit  him. He did love her. "I love her," he mumbled out loud, just to hear  how it sounded and to know how it felt to say it. He felt his mouth lift  up in a grin. He loved her. He wanted to shout it from the rooftops.

He knew he'd sat there to long but he needed to get control over his own  emotions. He finally got up to go talk to Jessica. He hated the pain  he'd caused her. He couldn't believe he'd just sat there as the tears  rolled down her cheeks and the pain flashed in her eyes. Well that would  never happen again. He would make up for that and so much more.

He walked up to their bedroom and there was no sign of her. He went  searching throughout the rest of the house, with no signs. He started to  worry. He walked back to his son's room and found Julia in there. "Do  you know where Jessica is?" he asked.

"I thought you had both gone out. She came in about an hour ago, saying  she would be out for the night," she replied. Her eyes then narrowed  slightly, as she looked at him. "She looked like something was really  bothering her, although she was doing her best to cover it up," she  finished accusingly.

Alex headed over to his room, planning on calling her phone. His  extension rang before he had a chance to make the call. He picked up on  the first ring, "hello."

"Is this Alex Anderson?" the stranger's voice asked.

"Yes, can I help you?"

"Sir, your wife has been in an auto accident. She's at the Mercy West  Hospital in surgery and you are listed as her emergency contact," the  stranger said with sympathy.

Alex dropped the phone without another word and ran for the door. He  shouted out for Tina to notify his and Jessica's families and then raced  to his car. He couldn't lose her. Please God, he prayed, don't take her  from me.

Alex made it to the hospital in record time. He couldn't even remember  the drive. One moment he hopped into his car and the next he was rushing  in the emergency entrance doors. "I'm looking for my wife, Jessica  Anderson!" He was practically shouting at the poor receptionist.

"One moment sir," the efficient nurse looked at her computer for what  seemed like hours. "She arrived about an hour ago and is still in  surgery. I need you to fill out these papers please," she requested, as  she pulled out a packet of paperwork.

"To hell with the paperwork, I want to know what's happening with my wife!" He shouted at the woman.         

     



 

"Sir, I understand you're upset right now but the doctor will be out  shortly to inform you of your wife's condition. We really do need these  papers filled out," she tried once again.

Alex was about to grab this insufferable woman by her shirt lapels and  demand to be taken to Jessica, when a hand clasped his shoulder. "Come  on son, let's fill out this paperwork and wait to hear from the doctor."  Alex's shoulders slumped in defeat. His father was there and he was  right.