The Billionaire's Best Friend(65)
***
The entire house was dark when he pulled into the driveway. Not even an outside light remained on, a reminder that Lauren wasn’t home. Since he’d moved in, she’d gotten into the habit of leaving the driveway light on for him on those nights he got home late. He’d started to think of it as a welcoming beacon. The absence of that light tonight only drove home how close he was to losing her again.
When Nate walked inside the kitchen Maggie and JoJo immediately greeted him, their tails wagging. The two dogs had become inseparable. Tomorrow when he moved back to his apartment, Maggie wasn’t going to like it. And the dog wasn’t the only one. No place he’d lived since joining the Marines had felt like home until now, and all because Lauren was there.
Is it worth it? He replayed Joe’s words from the afternoon. Yeah, he wanted this, but was it worth risking his and Lauren’s future for it? If he spent the rest of his career working cases in Boston, he’d be satisfied. Would it be as thrilling? Would there be the same adrenaline rushes? Hell, no. But he did have other options. An email had gone out yesterday about the SWAT team tryouts. A spot on that would allow him to stay in Boston and still fulfill his desire for a bit more excitement. Not only that, but from the sound of it, it would put far less stress on their relationship. Not that Lauren couldn’t handle it, but was it fair for him to do that to her? Especially without preparing her for it? Maybe if he’d told her about it from the start. If he’d done that rather than making his own assumptions, they could have discussed it. If he’d done that she would’ve had a chance to digest the idea before he uprooted her life.
What he should have done, no longer mattered. The mistake was made. Now he needed to find a way to fix it.
Pulling a beer out of the refrigerator, Nate headed for the living room. With Lauren gone, the house felt like a tomb. He needed some background noise, anything on television would do tonight. He knew the Sox had another game tonight against the Yankees. It was the third game in a four-game series. Only that past Wednesday night they’d cuddled together on the couch watching the Sox beat the Yankees. They’d talked about catching a few games at Fenway that summer. Maybe even asking Callie and Dylan to join them.
Now, that whole night seemed like another lifetime. Nice job fucking things up. Tipping back the bottle, he took a swig as the dogs jumped up on the couch next to him. What if he stayed put? Passed on HRT. He reached out and scratched Maggie under her collar. In response, the dog dropped her head on his lap, her eyes closed. “Too bad I can’t make Lauren happy this easily.” He glanced down at the dog and then turned up the volume on the television as the announcer rattled off the starting lineup for the game.
The voice from the TV became little more than white noise as he sorted out the questions in his head. Would she stay with him if he didn’t report to Quantico next month? Only one way to find out. She asked for time and space. He’d give her until Sunday night—then he’d make his offer. If she wanted, he’d pass on HRT. A life with her meant a hell of a lot more to him. In the meantime he had no intention of moving out. When she returned from Newport he’d be right here waiting for her, ready to fight for her. Because the truth was, he had no life without her. He’d already tried that, and the thought of going back to it left him numb.
***
She stared into the empty mug, her mind on the conversation from lunch. Both Charlie and Sara had given her a lot to think about. Before Charlie’s comment, she’d never considered that Nate broke up with her because he would have found a relationship too difficult while in the Marines. Now though, she saw there may have been multiple reasons for what he did. Sara’s warning also resonated with her. If she let her anger from the past influence her decision now, she may regret it later. If she sent him away now, she’d likely never get another chance with him. Was that really what she wanted?
“Hey, I thought I was the only one up.” Allison walked into the kitchen and went straight to the refrigerator.
Lauren shot her a weak smile. “Couldn’t sleep, so I came down for some warm milk with cinnamon.”
“Does that work?”
“Sometimes. Not so much tonight.”
“I wanted to tell you this earlier but you seemed done with the conversation.” Allison dropped into the seat next to her. “Guys don’t think the same way we do. Trust me, I have four brothers. Sometimes I wonder if they think at all.”
“Four, ouch. I’m sorry. I have one, and that’s more than enough.”
The comment elicited an immediate laugh. “You have no idea. Anyway, today you said your boyfriend left out a few details when he proposed. Maybe it was unintentional.”