Then he turned back to face me, leaning against the counter, "You want to.” He repeated with a lopsided grin, “And that's enough for me."
I swallowed, unable to even shake my head to deny him that.
I did want to go on that date with him. I did want to pretend that life was as simple as that.
Perhaps, had I met Lewis before Sebastian, everything would have been different.
But it wasn't different, I reminded myself stonily.
This was my life. I was married to Sebastian and pregnant with his child. The time for silliness and dating frivolously was over. It simply didn't matter how I felt about the handsome blond before me, and it didn’t matter how Lewis felt about me either.
Whether or not I was happy in my marriage, I was still married. Even if that meant nothing to Sebastian, it meant something to me.
"I'll go ahead." He said, watching as the pensive tenseness spread over my face, "You obviously have a lot on your mind. But I'm only a phone call away, Macy." He said softly, "I'm here for you."
"Thanks, Lewis." I responded quietly, sighing as he walked out the back door.
Once I was sure he was gone, I dropped my head in my hands, staring into the darkened crook of my shoulder.
Did I really want to go on a date with Lewis? The butterflies that fluttered anxiously inside of me made that a firm 'yes.' But was it because I liked Lewis and enjoyed his company, or because I was just so damn lonely these days?
Something had to give.
With a sigh, I grabbed my own coffee cup, rinsing it in the kitchen sink.
Harry didn't put up with messiness in his kitchen. He'd be irked to death if Lewis and I just left our dirty cups lying around for him to clean.
And if he was peeved, Karina was peeved, and that just meant a bad time for me.
I smirked, shaking my head slightly.
What a pair they made. I wondered if they even saw it themselves yet. Everyone around them could see how happy they made one another...
What did everyone around Sebastian and I think, or even Lewis and I? Was the resolution of this complicated situation so clear to everyone around me but still blind to me?
It wouldn't have shocked me in the slightest if that was the case. Hindsight is 20/20 after all.
I set our mugs on the drying rack, leaving the bakery behind me.
Usually, when I left the shop after a long day's thoughtful pondering, everything seemed so much more clear and so much more obvious.
Today, however, things seemed even more muddled.
When I finally got back to the mansion, everything was quiet once more.
"Karina?" I called, peering into the empty dining room.
"Oh, she's been gone for an hour or so Mrs. Davis." Tricia spoke from the kitchen as she slowly walked around the corner to look at me.
"Oh, is that so?" I hummed, picking up some dishes for the chef and walking them towards the kitchen doors.
The woman hurriedly took them from me, glancing around as though Karina would spring out of nowhere. My mother in law probably had cameras set up, I didn't blame Tricia for erring on the cautious side.
"Yes, she went to send your husband some packages." She continued, "She should be back by supper."
"Oh really?" I asked, frowning, "What kind of packages?"
Tricia blinked her almond eyes at me, frowning. She clearly thought the Mrs. of the house should be more in the know. We shared that inkling, more than the chef realized.
"Well, ma’am, he needed some important items." Tricia said slowly, "Since he won't be back from London for five months."
Five months.
Five whole freaking months.
That was basically the rest of my pregnancy. He was abandoning me through the most painful and pivotal part of this?
What the hell?
I would be huge by the time he got back.
Tricia, uncomfortable with the blank look on my shocked face, slid back into the kitchen noiselessly.
This time, Sebastian had left no sweet note. He'd left no word at all.
He'd just left me.
Chapter Eight
The days crawled into weeks, weeks into months.
By the time the fifth month mark was slowly approaching, Sebastian Davis's gorgeous blue eyes were the last thing on my mind.
I was a bit over 8 months by now, all swollen ankles and aching back. Sleeping was almost impossible.
Fortunately enough the rest of the pregnancy had progressed smoothly. Karina went to most of the appointments with me, though Lewis had been my taxi more than a handful of times.
Being around the blond manager of the bakery was easier than I thought it would be, I'll be honest. He knew what to say to make me laugh, he knew how to calm down my anxiety.
I felt, sometimes, that he knew me better than anyone.
I couldn't help but to compare him to Sebastian. Why couldn't Sebastian be the one making me laugh, or to feel the baby kick for the first time?