Alex smiled faintly. 'I made a bit of a hit with Nemo. From then on I was in, but he's a great little boy.'
Cathy Spencer sipped her coffee, then put her cup down with something like decision. Alex held her breath, expecting to have to somehow fend off Cathy claiming Nicky and taking him away, but she got a surprise.
'Have you any idea how I got myself into this mess-what is your name?'
'Alex, but-'
'Alex, then, I need to talk to someone,' Cathy said with just a glint of her former fire. 'I need to try to make someone believe I'm not quite the hard-hearted person I'm painted. I honestly didn't believe it was Max's child! Without going into too many details of my love life, I'd gone off the pill, it wasn't agreeing with me, but I hadn't told Max.'
She paused and Alex was forcibly reminded of Max's Scheherazade remark because she sensed she was going to get drawn into this tale whether she liked it or not.
'We were coming to the bitter end of our relationship,' Cathy continued. 'We weren't communicating other than rowing. He wanted us to get married, he wanted a conventional wife who was like the jewel of his household, who would never embarrass him, who would always be there, who would always do the right thing. I'm not like that. I'm a free spirit at heart and I had no desire to be drawn into the Goodwin machine-and it is a machine. We had one last tempestuous night, then I walked away and fell into the arms of a friend for a couple of weeks.'
She closed her eyes. 'I wasn't thinking too straight, but I did have at the back of my mind that it can take some time to conceive after you've come off the pill.' Her dark lashes swept up. 'Then I realized I had conceived, but whereas with-with my friend, it could have been the right time of the month, with Max it should not have been. I just didn't,' Cathy Spencer said sadly, 'take into consideration that my cycle had gone quite haywire.'
'Your friend,' Alex said, and hesitated.
'He never knew. Oh, he was sweet enough and he helped me to pick up the pieces, but I had no more desire to be tied to him than I'd had to be tied to this empire.'
She looked around, then she grimaced. 'Funnily enough, given the circumstances, I just couldn't bring myself to have a termination.'
She looked down and pleated the hem of her jumper. 'I think,' she said with a frown,
'it was because I'm such a believer in life and in creating things rather than destroying them. And it was also a part of me.' Cathy raised her hands to point inwards to her chest, then she sighed. 'Of course the irony that Nicky should turn out to be a mini-Max hasn't failed to strike me.'
'There's one area he's very like you,' Alex said. 'He adores drawing and painting. He's the most artistic six-year-old I've ever met.'
For a moment Cathy Spencer's long-lashed blue eyes glowed.
'So when did you find out whose baby he was?'
The glow in Cathy's eyes diminished and she smiled wearily. 'At first Nicky looked like my father, according to my mother-I didn't know my father, he died before I was born. Then, if anything, he looked like me, and there was always going to be the possibility he'd be blue-eyed with dark hair so it wasn't a pointer, necessarily, to Max. But by the time he was walking and talking, he was growing more and more like Max. Now, they even have the same shape feet.'
'So why didn't you tell Mr Goodwin then?'
Cathy gripped her hands together. 'I could not lose the feeling that it would be like handing Max a tool to-to control me, but not only that, I love Nicky and I do want what's best for him. I did think it would be best to go it alone with him rather than subject him to-' she closed her eyes '-a father and mother who-' Cathy gestured eloquently and shook her head with a question mark in her eyes. Alex sat back. The house was quiet. Both Nicky and Nemo obviously slept on. What could she say? she wondered. Was she expected to answer that unspoken question? What would she say if she had no trauma to do with Max Goodwin herself?
Her next thought was to take herself to task immediately. She had no place in all this. If Max felt anything for her it was a small spark, that was all. How it had come about, if it really existed, she didn't know; she could only theorize. He'd been under immense strain; he'd shown concern for her; she had fallen into his lifestyle with Nicky almost as if she'd been made for it.
So alongside that small spark, or perhaps it had grown out of it, there was gratitude on his side and affection-how could it ever be more? Above all, she was only a bit player in this drama, and if she had any sense at all she would cease even to be that.
There was only one way to answer the implied question Cathy Spencer was posing-
the answer she would have given if she'd truly been an unbiased outsider.
'I think you'll find Mr Goodwin also has Nicky's best interests at heart and very much so,' she said quietly. She drew a deep breath and went on, 'And, forgive me, but to be honest, if two people can't find some road to travel that gives the child they've created an even, loving passage, they would not only be foolish, they'd be, to my mind, incredibly self-centred.'
CHAPTER EIGHT
MONTHS later, Alex could remember word for word what she'd said to Cathy Spencer, her stunned reaction to it, and how the rest of that fateful morning had panned out.
Cathy had still been staring at her, wide-eyed and with an expression of growing guilt, when Mrs Mills had come in with a remote phone …
'Mr Goodwin would like to speak to you, Miss Spencer,' she said, and handed the phone to her.
Alex got up. 'We'll leave you alone,' she murmured.
'Thanks.' Cathy stared at the phone for a moment as if she were afraid it was going to bite her, then she put it to her ear. 'Max?'
'Where was he?' Alex asked Mrs Mills as they retreated to the kitchen.
'Out jogging, apparently. He hadn't told anyone and he hadn't taken his phone. Does she want to take Nicky?'
Alex hesitated. 'I don't think so. I think she seriously wants to do what's best for Nicky. She's also just lost her mother so she's pretty fragile.'
Mrs Mills heaved a heartfelt sigh. 'They were good together, you know. Maybe they hid their warring side from the staff-' she made a small moue '-which is not to say they didn't have the odd disagreement, but if they both want what's best for Nicky now, perhaps they'll tie the knot, who knows? It's what they should do.'
If I hear that once more, Alex thought with a feeling of suppressed savagery that took her completely by surprise, I'll scream. If they were so good together how did it all descend into this and how on earth could a marriage survive all this?
But she immediately took herself to task again. It was what they should do. Surely it wasn't too much to ask that they reshape their relationship for Nicky's sake? Not only that, they were different now, they had to be. Cathy was alone and bereft-
'Alex?'
She looked over her shoulder to see that Cathy had come into the kitchen and was holding the phone out to her.
'Max wants to talk to you.'
And if that isn't just the last straw, I don't know what is, was Alex's next thought as she took the phone with a completely deadpan expression. 'Hello.'
'Alex … ' he paused ' … how are you?'
'Fine. Thank you.'
'Alex, Cathy is going to stay for a few days while we sort things out. I'll be down this afternoon and-'
'Mr Goodwin,' she broke in, 'in that case may I go home? You won't need me and I'd really like to-to have a bit of time to myself.'
He hesitated, then he said abruptly, 'All right. Put me on to Mrs Mills and I'll organize it. I'll keep in touch-and, Alex?'
'Yes?'
'Thanks for everything.'
'That's-that's OK,' she said awkwardly, and handed the phone to Mrs Mills.
'Nicky,' Alex said half an hour later, just after she'd heard the boy stirring in the next room, 'how do you feel?'
'Good.' He sat up. 'What are we going to do today?'
'Well, I'm going home for-'
'Why? Please don't, Alex! Pretty please! Nemo doesn't want you to go either.'
Alex smiled through the lump in her throat as she watched the boy and dog. 'Nicky, I would love to stay,' she said honestly, 'but I have to go. And, anyway, I have a surprise for you, it's someone you really, really-'
'My dad's home! Yippee!' He and Nemo jumped up and down on the bed. Alex flinched inwardly as she wondered what Cathy Spencer, standing just beyond the inter-leading door, would make of this-she'd agreed to Alex's request that she say goodbye to Nicky first.