“When I met you back in August,” he continued, “I was instantly charmed by your natural beauty and your honest and sincere personality. Then, the more time I spent hanging out with you and talking to you on the phone, the more I realized how much I really liked you. I honestly thought that you might be the one to make my heart forget about Jillian. But a little over a month ago, she and I were out at a bar and we started drunk talking about love and life and all of that… and then before I knew it, we were kissing. Afterwards, I was a wreck. I didn’t know what to think about if or how things changed between her and me. And I felt guilty about what I had done to you and about whether or not I should tell you.” He looked into my face, trying to gage my reaction.
“You didn’t have to tell me Dylan, we weren’t exclusive or anything. You just needed to tell me if y’all were going to get together so that I wasn’t cheating with some other girl’s man. I don’t do that,” I assured him.
He nodded. “Well, Jillian and I didn’t decide to get together after that kiss. We really didn’t even talk about it. But it did change things between us. The way we looked at each other became different… more sensual, more intense, more possessive. I’m not sure exactly how to describe it, but I know you understand the emotions behind it. It’s the same way you and Ash look at each other.”
My eyes shot to his face at his last sentence and he smiled understandingly at me. I didn’t even bother to argue or defend my and Ash’s relationship because it would’ve been no use. Dylan knew how I felt about Ash because he felt the same way about Jillian.
“I’m sorry,” I forced out of my vocal chords, not sure what else to say.
“Don’t be, Scarlett. But just understand why I didn’t tell you about her before, and understand that I did enjoy spending time with you, the same way you did with me… well, at least I hope you did.” He grinned widely at me. I simply nodded in response. I certainly did understand.
“So back to last Saturday,” Dylan wiped the smile off his face and looked solemnly in my eyes. “The night before our date, Jillian and I had a sit down talk to discuss our feelings and we put everything out on the table… including our clothes if you know what I mean.” He closed his eyes and winced at his revelation.
I stifled a laugh as I remembered back to the Friday night before and thought that I probably had Mason’s cock in my mouth around the same time that Dylan was balls deep in his bestie. He opened his eyes and saw that I wasn’t even close to upset. “You’re not mad that I had sex with someone else the night before I took you on a date?” He asked incredulously.
“No, Dylan, I’m not. I am actually happy for you and Jillian. I just wish you would have told me. We didn’t have to go out the next day. You could’ve taken her instead.”
“I would never do that to you. I really wanted to tell you that night, but we were having such a good time. And honestly, I knew it would likely be the last time that we ever went out, so I was trying to enjoy it. My getting together with Jillian doesn’t change the fact that I really like you. It’s actually more of a reason that I need to stay away from you. You are a temptation that I find hard to refuse.” Even as he was saying the words, lustful thoughts weighed down his eyelids and his voice dropped. I would be lying if I didn’t admit that I was a little bit tempted to crawl over to him, straddle his lap, and kiss him senseless. But sanity and reason prevailed, and I stayed sitting on my cushion. I wasn’t that girl and I didn’t need any more drama in my life.
Instead, I kissed the backs of his hands that were threaded through mine. “Dylan, I wish you and Jillian all the luck in the world. I would love to remain friends with you, possibly even meet her, but I would never want to do anything that would cause a problem in y’all’s relationship in any way. You just let me know, okay?” He nodded and I continued. “I want to thank you for being such a gentleman and a great friend to me when I first got here. I will never forget that.”
With nothing more to really say, we both stood up and I walked him to the door. Right before he opened it to leave, Dylan turned around and hugged me. “I hope Ash is smart enough one day to go after what his heart really wants. Until then, take care of yourself and promise me you won’t get involved with any douchebags,” he whispered in my ear and kissed my cheek. I laughed and I felt truly content with the way things were ending with Dylan.
“I promise.”
I found myself sitting in my apartment alone on a Saturday night with no plans and no way of getting anywhere even if I did; it was eerily similar to the way I had spent the first eighteen and a half years of Saturdays in my life. With Evie gone and Dylan out of the picture, I wasn’t sure who to even contact about making plans. I didn’t even have Mina’s or Jess’ numbers, Evie always took care of making our plans with them. I opened the contacts section of my phone and found I only had three other numbers besides family members: Evie, Ash, and Mason.
As much as I wanted to, I definitely wasn’t calling or texting Mason after spending the entire previous night with him. It was up to him to contact me; the last thing I wanted to come off as was clingy or desperate. I contemplated whether or not I should message Ash; I had never initiated a texting conversation with him mainly for the same reasons I didn’t want to do the same to Mason. My grandmother had always told me when I was younger, “Never chase after a boy, Scarlett. You let them chase you.” I felt like I was chasing them both in a way as it was, I didn’t need to blow up their phones to emphasize the fact.
I hadn’t heard from Ash since I walked off the stage and practically out the door of the bar. I guessed that he either didn’t care if I made it home okay this time or he assumed I wasn’t going home or maybe both. For the life of me, I could not figure him out. I also wanted to yell at him about his stunt calling me out the way he had done. I wasn’t really mad at him any longer, if his goal had been to piss off Mason, it had quite the opposite effect. I probably owed him a thank you.
I really didn’t want to spend the rest of the night by myself, so I swallowed my pride and hoped he would respond.
Me (7:55 PM) You going to J & N’s tonight?
Luckily, he didn’t make me wait long.
Ash (7:58 PM) Was planning on it. You going with Dylan or Evie?
Me (8:00 PM) Neither. Not seeing D anymore, Evie at Max’s. Want to come get me?
I figured there was no reason to beat around the bush.
Ash (8:03 PM) I’ll be there at 9
Me (8:o4 PM) K, See you then
Pleased with myself for rectifying my lonely night and having the self-confidence to ask Ash to come and pick me up, I skipped to my closet to find something to wear.
An hour later I opened the door to find Ash wearing almost the exact outfit that I had on: worn out jeans, a navy blue t-shirt (mine was a bit more fitted than his), and brown flip flops. We took one look at each other and cracked up laughing.
“I guess I need to change,” I said, turning around and heading back into the room with Ash following close behind. I could smell his unique Ash scent and couldn’t wait to snuggle up in it later that night.
“I don’t care if you change or not. I think it’s pretty funny actually, and besides, you look good in that,” he said. He grabbed my shoulder and turned me around to face him. I expected him to say something else but instead he just stared at me. It was like he was trying to read some deep dark secret buried in my soul or something. After what seemed like an hour, but was probably more like a minute, I broke the silence. “If you’re sure, then I’m ready. Just let me grab my phone and my purse.” I wasn’t sure if he expecting or wanting me to bring up the previous night, but I had decided it was best if I didn’t.
I gathered my purse and phone, locked up, and followed him out to his car. I wasn’t sure about Ash but to me the whole situation felt rather bizarre… almost like a date. We had never gone anywhere together with just the two of us in a car. I tried hard to remind myself that it wasn’t, that he was simply a friend giving me a ride to a party that he happened to be going to anyways, but my heart refused to listen and was fluttering violently as he opened the car door for me.
We hadn’t been on the road but two or three minutes when Ash looked over at me and asked, “What do you say we grab some Chinese takeout and take it back to my place and just hang out there? Meg had a project or something so she wasn’t going tonight either.” He looked hopeful that I would agree and my heart soared even higher. The higher it climbed, the further it would fall…
“Sure, that sounds fine,” I agreed, trying not to send too eager. Hmmm, lets see. I can go hang out at a party and watch a bunch of girls throw themselves at Ash without even Dylan there to distract me, or I could go spend the entire evening at Ash’s house, just the two of us. And Meg, I reminded myself, but she sure wasn’t interested in getting in Ash’s pants. It wasn’t a very difficult decision.
Half an hour later, the three of us sat around their kitchen table stuffing our faces with the feast that Ash had ordered for us. Meg had let me borrow some pajama pants so that I could relax completely and not have to hang around in my jeans. We all joked around and complained about the coursework that we had to complete before the Thanksgiving holiday. After dinner, Meg excused herself and disappeared into her room to work on her project. Ash and I refilled our drinks and moved down the hall into his room. He grabbed a pair of his pajama pants as well and went into the bathroom to shower. While I waited for him to return, I noticed a large drawing on his desk that he had obviously been working on. At first glance it appeared to be a tribal butterfly, similar to several tattoos I had seen before. However, as I looked closer, I noticed that the names Eros and Psyche were interwoven into the wings of the butterfly. I immediately thought back to the first night I had met Ash and ended up spending the night in his bed, that night we had unknowingly began our string of Saturday night sleepovers, and the night that he had called me Psyche.