Without thinking, I bolt through the doorway, putting my hand on Jeff’s shoulder.
“Hey, why don’t you let me deal with this?”
He looks at me skeptically and leans down to whisper in my ear. I keep my eyes on Joss’s dad, who’s watching us carefully. “It’s some nutty guy. We get them all the time. You don’t need to worry about it.”
I give Jeff my best I’m the boss look that I stole from Tammy and say, “You can stand nearby, but I know what this is about, so can I talk to him for a minute? Please?”
Jeff sighs and steps several feet away, where he gets on his walkie-talkie but keeps an eagle eye on us.
As I turn to face the man who helped create Joss Jamison, I wonder for a minute at my own audacity. Who the hell am I to get involved in this? Maybe I should be calling for Tammy or Walsh? I mean, I’ve only known Joss for a few weeks. But then I remember that I was the one he took to his grandmother’s house yesterday. I was the one he told about his dad. I was the one he put that ultimate trust in. So, I stride forward and put my hand out as I say, “Mr. Jamison? I’m Mel DiLorenzo, a friend of Joss’s.”
Relief washes over his face as he realizes I’m accepting who he is.
“Joseph Jamison,” he says as he shakes my hand. “Joseph Senior.”
“Joseph…Joss. I never knew,” I answer in surprise.
He gives me a sad smile. “I imagine it’s not something he chooses to publicize.”
“So you knew Joss was in town?” I ask as I gesture to some folding chairs sitting nearby against the wall. We move to them and sit down.
“I try to keep up with the band,” he answers simply. “I thought about seeing them when they were here two years ago, but well, it’s not easy, you know. We uh…haven’t seen each other in a lot of years.”
That’s an understatement, I think to myself. “So what made you decide to come this time?”
He clears his throat and looks blankly at the wall across the hall. I watch his profile, and I’m disturbed by how much he looks like Joss. How can people not see it? How is he not mobbed in public by people mistaking him for his famous son?
Finally he shakes himself a little as if getting rid of an uncomfortable thought. “I heard about his mom dying,” he says quietly. Joss’s mother passed away about a year and a half ago. “I guess, well, I know he’s a grown man—a rich man—but I didn’t want him to feel like he was all alone in the world, you know? As long as he had his mom, I always figured he was better off without me. I wasn’t much of a dad. I don’t have a knack for it. But Joss, without a mom or brothers or sisters, I’ve been alone my whole life. I didn’t want that for him.”
He hangs his head, and my heart aches for his honesty and for how terribly close to the truth he is. Joss is alone in the world, and I can see it every time I look into his eyes. I can also see how much he hates it. Could this man change that for him? Is it my place to make that decision? I can send him on his way or I can bring him past those doors and change Joss’s life forever. Maybe for the better, but maybe not.
I take a deep breath, thinking through the ramifications of this. I know I can’t presume to make the choice for Joss, but I need to ensure that he has a choice to make. “Mr. Jamison—Joseph—the show is about to start, and I can’t let you see Joss beforehand. You can understand that, can’t you?”
He looks up, worry etched along the fine lines of his face. “I don’t want to do anything that’ll interfere with the performance. I just want him to know where I am. If he ever needs anything, you know? And also that I’m real proud of him. His mother did a good job with him. He’s ended up being a fine man.”
I smile at him, feeling warmth in my heart that I have no right to feel. “You’re right,” I answer. “He is—a really great guy.” I surprise myself with how much I believe the words I’ve just said. I pause and then take the plunge. “Will you come back to this door right after the show to see him?”
His face breaks out into one of those Joss Jamison smiles. The smile that sets women’s hearts on fire. Joseph Jamison Senior is no slouch in the looks department, and my guess is he’s plenty popular with the ladies in his own right.
“That would be great, Miss DiLorenzo. Will you meet me back here then?”
“I will,” I tell him. We shake hands, and he heads out to the seats to watch the show.
As Jeff walks me back inside the restricted area, he asks, “Was that guy legit? I didn’t even know Joss had a dad.”
“Everyone’s got a dad somewhere, Jeff,” I tell him without really answering his question.
He nods like he understands.
“He’ll be back at the end of the concert. Just have him wait until I get here, okay?”
“Sure thing, Mel. See you then.”
“And Jeff?”
“Yes?
“Let’s keep this between us for now. It’s up to Joss what he wants to do with it.”
Once again, his nod says that he gets it. Really gets it.
The show goes off without a hitch, meaning all the work Joss and Mike did with the crew on the stage setup paid off. The guys come offstage, and instead of his usual hug, Joss grabs me and kisses me hard on the lips. I feel my face heat up, but at the same time, my heart flutters inside my chest. I look around quickly, wondering how many people saw, but everyone’s too busy congratulating each other to notice us.
He leaves his arm around my waist and leans down to my ear. His breath is hot, and it sends shivers across the skin of my neck. “I’m not hiding how I feel about you, Mel, so you may as well stop worrying what everyone’s going to think.”
I don’t know how to answer him. I don’t know what I feel. My body wants him, my heart seeks him, but my head keeps screaming, Run! I decide no answer is the best choice right now. And there are other issues to deal with.
“Can I talk to you for a minute?” I ask. “Alone,” I add.
He grins at me. “Of course.” Then he grabs my hand and half-drags me back along the corridor to his dressing room, where he closes the door behind us and locks it.
He throws himself down on the sofa, stretching out with his feet up and his hands tucked behind his head. “Okay, lay it on me,” he says. “All the reasons why we can’t be together. But just know nothing you say will change my mind.”
I think I’m actually grateful that Mr. Jamison showed up tonight. I can postpone this discussion for another day. God knows I don’t have any answers. I’m fighting something that feels inevitable, but somehow I know if I don’t go down fighting I’ll hate myself later.
I pace up and down the floor for a moment before I stop and face him. I see his smile falter. He can tell this is something else. “There’s something I need to tell you.”
He sits up now. “Okay.”
“Before the show, a man came to the back door. I was standing nearby, and when the door opened, I heard him talking to Jeff outside. The guy said he was your father.”
Joss jumps from the sofa and steps toward me. “What?!”
I put a hand on his arm. “I went outside to check it out. I talked to him. Joss…”
The look on his face is breaking my heart. I can see that little boy who wanted his dad so much he would stare at the skyscrapers of downtown Denver just to feel closer to him. I also see the rage of a young man abandoned by that one person in the world who was supposed to be there for him no matter what.
I pull him down to sit on the sofa again. He sits motionless, his elbows on his knees, his head in his hands. I stroke his hair while I talk. “It was pretty obvious just by looking at him who he is, Joss. Did you have pictures of him?’
He nods. “A few. My mom always said I looked like him,” he answers quietly.
“You do. Just like him. It’s eerie.”
Joss turns and stares at me, his voice is hard but his heart bleeding all over his face. “What does he want? Money?”
It makes me so sad that he can’t imagine a world where his father would want to see him just because he loves him. My chest aches with how badly I want to take that look off his face, that tone out of his voice.
“I don’t think so,” I say honestly. “He heard your mother died and he was worried about you being alone. He wants you to know he’s here and that you can contact him if you need anything.”
Joss huffs out a breath and stands. He runs his hand through his beautiful hair in a gesture I’m beginning to recognize as frustration.
“Somehow, I doubt I could rely on him for much of anything,” he says bitterly.
“Probably, but don’t you think you should see him? I mean, this may be the only chance you ever have.”
He turns sharply, eyes narrowed. “You mean he’s still here?”
I nod slowly. “I told him to come to the back door when the show ended. Jeff’s keeping him there until I go get him.” My words rush out now, underscoring my fear that Joss will be angry with me for my presumption. “But I can send him away if you’d rather. I wasn’t sure what to do. I was so afraid you’d miss your one chance, but I didn’t want to interfere, and then he seemed really genuine about—”