“Maddie, I love you. I made a mistake. A big mistake, and I hurt you. Please give me another chance.” I leaned forward to kiss her again, and for a moment I felt I had gotten through to her. Her lips melted against mine, and she kissed me back. My tongue slid between her lips eagerly, anxious and happy to taste her again. I felt like I was inhaling manna from heaven, and I moved closer to her, so I could run my hands through her hair. I felt her fingers in my hair, tugging on the strands as she kissed me back. I slid my hand to her breast to caress it, and then she jumped back and broke the kiss. Her eyes looked at me feverishly and my heart dropped as she shook her head and grabbed my hands.
“Listen to me, Logan.” She spoke slowly and steadily, and I sat there staring at her, wondering how I had could have ever doubted her. “You are a special, wonderful, brilliant man. You’re not less than anyone. You are handsome, and kind, and funny, and you are loving and sweet. And my heart will always have a place for you, but I’m not the one for you.” She shook her head slowly. “I love you, but I can’t do this.”
“Give me another chance,” I begged her, my head caught up in the wonder of her words. “I fucked up. I know. I will do anything to prove myself to you.”
“I can’t do this, Logan!” she shouted at me, and the tears ran down her face more quickly this time, smearing her mascara. “I just can’t do this. Please. You hurt me. You are so quick to think the worst of me. I will do anything for you. But I just can’t do this. What you did to me the other night, it hurt me more than I’ve ever been hurt in my life. You crushed me. Do you understand that? You crushed me!”
“Your dad used to be best friends with my dad.” The words coming out of my mouth sounded robotic. “Your dad was upset because my dad was smarter and got my mom. Your dad set my dad up with the police. My dad’s life was never the same.” I knew I was mumbling and not making sense, but I couldn’t stop myself. I wanted her so badly to understand. “I grew up hating your dad because my dad hated him for ruining his life. We came to this house every week for years and just sat outside, and my dad would tell us about his dreams and his goals before your dad screwed him over. And then we would go home to our squalor, and we’d lay in bed hungry and cold, and we hated the family that lived on Manor Road.” I paused to see if she was listening, and I saw the dismayed shock on her face as she stared at me. I continued and lifted up my shirt, “You see this scar? My dad stabbed me one day when I asked him to take us home. I was fed up of hearing the story about what your dad had done. It consumed his life. He was a drunk. He is a drunk.” I paused and banged my fist against the steering wheel, unable to look at her as I spoke. “I hate him so much, I hate who he is. He’s a sorry drunk who hit his wife and his kids, and I hate your dad for making him that person. I’m a jumble of emotions and I don’t even know what to say.” I turned to look at her to see how she was reacting, and she ran her hands down my chest and over my scar. She looked up at me with more tears welling in her eyes and I continued, this time, grabbing her hands and talking. “My whole life has consisted of hating your dad, stealing cars, and trying to make a better life for my brothers. I never wanted to meet a girl and fall in love, and I certainly never wanted to meet you.” I rubbed the tears away from her face as she cried. “When I saw you that night, I wondered who you were, this calm, cool and beautiful car thief, and I took you to the field because we had instant chemistry and I just liked how I felt when I was around you. And then you were so spunky and confident, and I was intrigued by you. When we made love, I felt like my body was on fire. But then you told me who you were, and I hated you. I hated myself for being with you.”
“That’s why you hurried me home.” She spoke softly, and I nodded. “I think I understand it now.” She sighed. “I’m glad you’re finally opening up to me. I guess I understand why you wanted to hate me.”
“But I couldn’t stop thinking of your sweet smile and confident manner. And you kept coming back for more, and you seemed to get me, to understand me, to know and like me. You saw the real me. The me inside of the shell. You saw the real Logan Martelli, and I couldn’t stop myself from falling for you.”
“I thought it was the sex.” She made a little joke and I felt my heart leap as she finally cracked a smile.
“Well, the sex was amazing, but that was just a bonus. You made me start to believe that there could be a happy ending for someone like me.”
“But you didn’t really believe it.” She shook her head, sad again.
“No, a part of me didn’t believe it.” I sighed. “And when I got to the party, with my heart in my hand, and you told your dad I was a ‘friend’ after everything, I thought to myself, it was all a lie. She doesn’t love me, she’s not going to always be there for me. And I just couldn’t take it. I needed to make you hurt, as you had hurt me.” I paused and closed my eyes. “And I regretted it as soon as I saw the look in your eyes when you realized I had opened the door.”
“You wanted to hurt me.”
“No.” I shook my head. “I have never wanted to hurt you.”
“And you didn’t trust me.” She bit her lip. “I would do anything for you, Logan, and my heart is broken about my father. I’m shocked and devastated, but I—”
“Do you love me?” I interrupted her, not wanting her to reject me again. She nodded and my heart soared. “Do you think I would hurt you on purpose?” She stared at me for a long time and shook her head. “Do you believe I love you?” My voice cracked as I said ‘love’ and she nodded, her eyes darkening. “I think we deserve to give each other another chance.” I stared at her, hoping to convince her to give me one last chance. “For the sake of love, give us one last chance.”
“Okay.” The sound was so low, I wasn’t sure that I had heard her properly.
“What?” I asked, not daring to believe the words I had heard.
“Okay, I’ll give you another chance.”
“No more dating Joey.” I grinned at her and she rolled her eyes. “And no more kissing him either.”
“I didn’t kiss him.” She laughed and I pulled her towards me.
“I saw him kiss you tonight.” I frowned at her, as I started to get jealous again. “You didn’t say no.”
“He pecked me, Logan.” She giggled. “That’s hardly a kiss.”
“Don’t let him do it again.”
“Okay.” She smiled and stared into my eyes. “I’m sorry about my dad.”
“You believe me?” I looked at her with a worried expression, scared she doubted what I had said.
“Yes.” She nodded. “I know you wouldn’t lie to me. And from some things my mother has said recently,” she sighed, “well, I think she was trying to tell me that my dad wasn’t or isn’t the man I think he is.”
“What did she say?” I looked at her curiously.
“You can ask her yourself.” She smiled at me. “We’ll go to lunch and she can tell you everything she knows, if you think that would help you.”
“I’d love to know more.” I nodded. “I feel like I don’t know everything. Maybe she can help me piece it together.”
“I don’t even know what to think about my dad.” She bit her lip and looked at me sadly. “I still love him, and it makes me feel so guilty. I just don’t know what to do.”
“I don’t want to talk about him.” I kissed her. “I still hate him. I don’t think I’ll ever stop hating him, but I’m not going to let that stop me from loving you with all my heart.”
“Do you really love me?” She grinned happily.
“If you love me.” I laughed easily now.
“Tell me again,” she whispered against my lips, almost shyly.
“I love you.”
“Why?” She looked at me in wonder.
“I love you because you’re spunky and brave. I love you because you’re the first person I think of in the morning and the last person I see before I go to bed at night. I dream of you and live my days thinking about how I can be a better man for you. I don’t know how I lived without you in my life, Maddie Wright.”
“I love you, Logan Martelli.”
“Why?” I held my breath as I waited for her response. A part of me still didn’t feel worthy of her love.
“I love you because you’re the most handsome man I’ve ever seen in my life. When you smile at me, a part of my heart explodes with happiness. When you look at me, I feel like you are seeing every part of me, and you care about what I have to say and what I do. I love that you appreciate that I’m a smart, loud, confident woman, but you also allow me to be your special someone, and you protect me, and keep me warm. I love that you like to take charge and dominate me, and when I feel you inside of me, I feel as if the world has stood still and there are only two people left.” She gasped as I slipped my hand up her dress and caressed her inner thighs. “When you touch me, I feel like my skin is on fire and only you can quench me.” I licked her lips and grinned against her mouth, laughing softly at her low moan as my fingers slipped into her panties.