There’s a limp, mocha-colored wrist lying on a blood stained carpet. The manicured fingers are curled and still. Her forearm disappears beneath a white sheet and the black bead from her bracelet is shattered next to her on the carpet. I stand there and stare, unable to move. My mind rejects what my eyes are telling me. Everything around me floats away as horror slams down hard on my shoulders, making my knees buckle, and forcing me to the floor.
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THE ARRANGEMENT VOL 12
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THE PROPOSITION
Bryan Ferro
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THE PROPOSITION
Vol. 1
The sky is clear except for a few white glittering stars. They’re hung high out of reach, impossibly beautiful and distant. The air has that crisp fall scent, and I know there will be frost tonight. Dad would have covered his plants with plastic to get a few more weeks from their fragile lives. The tarp is in the basement, still folded, where he kept it. The pansies will freeze and fade. This is their last night in this house, as it is mine.
Pushing the swing on the back porch with the tip of my foot, I start it swaying again. Life is so fleeting, so meaningless. The hole that’s swallowing me is relentless. I thought I’d cry more, but I haven’t even been able to do that. The tears won’t fall. Neil says it’s because my father’s death hasn’t hit me yet, but it has. The weight of his loss is pressing so hard on my shoulders that I can’t lift my face from the dirt. For all those years, it was just the two of us. He was always there for me. He saved me from incomprehensible misery and now that he’s gone, I find myself back in the shallows, unable to escape.
My eyes sweep over the wooden fence, taking in the rotten boards. Things were tight and I knew Dad sacrificed for me, I just had no idea how much until now. My college bills, my car, and all the things I needed were paid for without a blink, but I never stopped to wonder where the money came from. Dad worked hard, so I assumed it was enough.
I was wrong.
There hasn’t been enough for a long time, and I had no idea. He never said anything. When I came home from classes at the end of the day, he’d hand me a twenty and tell me to be a kid and go have fun. He said stuff like that all the time. It makes me wonder if he knew what was coming, but there’s no way he foresaw this.
When I came home from class last week, I found him in the yard, face down in a pile of leaves. My throat tightens and I push away the memory. It’s not something that I ever want to see again, but it lights up over and over again. My senses are overloaded. I can still feel Dad’s cold skin and the weight of his lifeless body as I rolled him over. The texture of his tattered flannel jacket is still on my fingertips. The sound of my strangled voice crying out his name over and over again still rings in my ears. I never felt so afraid. For the first time in a long time, I am alone.
My phone is on the wooden swing and chirps next to me. I don’t feel like talking. Silence has encased me inside a tomb of misery since that day. Neil stood next to me and held my hand until hours blurred into days. Neil didn’t want to leave me alone here tonight, but I insisted. It’s my last night in this house. I’ll never step over the threshold again. I’ll never catch the scent of my father’s aftershave in his little bathroom. All the memories will be lost and it will be like he never existed.
~COMING NOVEMBER 2013~
The Story of Bryan Ferro
MORE FERRO FAMILY BOOKS
SECRETS & LIES
Coming Soon
BRYAN FERRO
~THE PROPOSITION~
Coming in November 2013
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SEAN FERRO
~THE ARRANGEMENT~
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PETER FERRO GRANZ
~DAMAGED~
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JONATHAN FERRO
~STRIPPED~
MORE ROMANCE BOOKS BY
H.M. WARD
DAMAGED
DAMAGED 2
STRIPPED
SCANDALOUS
SCANDALOUS 2
SECRETS
THE SECRET LIFE OF
TRYSTAN SCOTT
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THE ARRANGEMENT VOL. 11
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The Arrangement
Vol. 12
H.M. Ward
Laree Bailey Press