“That’s where you’re wrong, because this is me. I am a monster and always have been. It’s not part of me, it is me. Whatever you think you saw wasn’t real. I used you like you used me.”
“I did not use—”
“You did,” he breathes in my face, pressing in nearer. “Every hour of every day has been about getting what you want. Well, what you want and what I want don’t match. They never have. I said what you wanted to hear to get what I need and I need those documents. I want them, Avery, and I will do anything I have to do to get them. Make no mistake about that.” Sean pushes off the wall and suddenly he’s across the room, looking out the window at the ocean.
I catch my breath and watch him, staring in silence. This is the end of my old life, I can feel it. What I was yesterday is gone—that girl no longer exists. Sucking in the cool night air, I move across the room and step up behind him. Hesitantly, I reach up, hand shaking, but stop without touching him.
Bringing my hand back to my side, I say, “I know you feel guilty about Bryan, about what happened, but it doesn’t have to go this way. Even if you don’t want to be with me, you don’t have to do this.”
“It’s not about you. It never was. You’re a nuisance, a mite that crawled under my skin and distracted me from my goals.”
His words make me want to cry, but I blink them back. I know what he’s doing; he’s trying to push me away. He lied to me, drugged me, and faked his shooting. It’s the aftermath of Bryan’s death that has him like this. He’s not spoken of it, but I can sense it. He blames himself. If things with Bryan hadn’t gone down the way they did, I’d have Sean talking about white picket fences.
“Fine,” I manage without a tremor in my voice. “How do I get you the documents?”
He rounds on me. “You have them?”
I nod. “I think so. If I’m right, I’ll give them to you under one condition.”
“You’re in no position to be stipulating conditions, Miss Smith.” The corners of his mouth twitch at the use of my pet name.
“Oh I think I am, Mr. Jones. You see I have something you want.”
“That something that will get you killed if you keep it.”
“Yes, but you won’t kill me to get it.” I pat my palms together and look up at him.
Sean smirks, making my pulse race faster. A wolfish smile crosses his lips. “Why on earth would you think that?” He moves toward me, one pace at a time, his body language more menacing than ever. “After everything I’ve done, why do you still think you can save me? Some people are just destined for Hell. You can’t stop it.”
“You’re not there, yet.”
Sean smiles down at me, taking a piece of hair and tucking it behind my ear. “I could have pushed you too far so many times. I could have broken you like I broke that girl, like I broke my wife. That’s what you fail to see, Avery. I don’t have demons, I am a demon. Every second I’m in your life will cause you more and more pain. Agony will have a new meaning after this, so don’t play games with me. You can’t win.”
The stupidest idea I’ve ever had crosses my mind. The information in those documents could be used to own every powerful family on Long Island, including the Ferro family. Eyes locked, my lips twist into a grin. “You’re all bark, Sean. You always have been, and this whole time we’ve been together, I’ve learned your tricks, your moves. Maybe I didn’t see them before, but it’s clear now.” I pace around him as I talk, and sound more confident than I feel. “The way I see it, as long as the documents are in my possession, I own you. If I take Miss Black’s job, I’ll own everyone. I won’t need you to protect me, because Black won’t want to lose me, and if those papers happen to end up in the hands of a reporter, well, I’m guessing the Ferro family would be ruined.” I stop in front of him, and look up into his face.
Anger and pride are warring within him. He enjoys it when I act this way, but he fears it, too. It means I understand him more, that I’m not the innocent girl he first met. It means I’m more like him. As I speak, his blue gaze narrows, his hands ball into fists, and he folds his arms over his chest. He laughs in my face. “You think you can take Campone’s place?”
“I know I can.”
Chapter 8
There have been a handful of times I’ve truly been afraid around Sean, where my gut tells me to flee or fight. This is one of them. My words have broken something inside his brain and, I swear to God, I heard it snap. His blue eyes narrow and he looks ready to break free, ready to allow the animal trapped within to escape. Using his body like a bulldozer, he pushes me back into the wall, his normal emotionless expression regaining control of his face.