The Arrangement Anthology 1(49)
I stare at the paper, reading the pretty cursive letters over and over again.
We love you! –Amanda & Baby
CHAPTER 2
I can’t swallow. I stare at the paper, feeling my throat grow tighter and tighter. There’s a baby. He’s a father. Sean is married and has a baby. Oh, holy…
I sit down hard and stare at the note. It was written hastily on a piece of computer paper. There are smudge marks, like someone grabbed it—the baby maybe. This is what he couldn’t say. It had nothing to do with me. It’s him. I press my eyes closed. I don’t know what to do. He has a family and he’s cheating—with me.
Misery bubbles up inside my chest. I wad the paper back up and put it in his pocket so it looks like I never saw it. I lock the closet door and make sure everything is back the way it was. Then, I walk into the bathroom and turn on the shower. I drop the robe to the floor and step in. I stand there, letting the water wash away every ounce of remorse I have. Sean’s a dick. He’s not what I thought at all. I wonder if I should confront him. It sounds insane, but I feel like I’m the one being cheated on.
He’s not yours, Avery, a little voice says in the back of my mind. He never was.
This is a job. That’s what it’s always been to him. That’s what it always will be. I swallow hard and turn off the water. After I towel off, I grab my phone and call Black.
“How are things going?” she says with her silky voice.
“Very well. I’d like to throw my name in for more work as soon as this is over.” Even as I said the words, I can’t believe I’m saying them. If Sean is like this, if I have to finish this job, by the time I’m done I’m going to be so emotionally repressed that it won’t matter who I fuck. Maybe this is what Mel and Black meant. Maybe it’s the reason why they ended up staying and taking more clients.
“Excellent, Avery.” Her voice has that hollow politeness that irritates me. I hear it now, vibrating like a plucked string. “Let me make sure I understand you correctly. You don’t want any time off between clients?”
“No,” I say, “The sooner the better.”
“I understand. Is there anything else?”
Is there? Should I tell her that I’m disillusioned? Should I tell her that I fell for Sean, but he’s just a cheating jackass? I smile to myself. I sound like an idiot. “No, that’s all.”
I press END CALL and toss my phone back in my bag. I let the numbness overtake me. There’s no other way to get through this, and I have to finish it. There’s no other way to survive.
_____
I leave the room in nothing but my robe around 2:00am. I’m stopped on the ground floor by the hotel manager. He’s an older, squat man wearing a pristine black suit. It distracts from his round face.
“Miss Ferro,” he says, taking my elbow to keep me from walking through the lobby. “May I help you with something?”
I nod. “Is Sean down here somewhere? I didn’t see him at the bar.”
“Yes, he is. Let me take you to him.” I walk next to the man. He offers, “My name is Thomas. If you need anything, I’m happy to help. Mr. Ferro is one of our best customers and as such, we try to humor his requests. However, I would appreciate it if you wore clothes next time you came down to the lobby.”
My face flames red. “Oh, I’m sorry.”
“It’s a perfectly honest mistake,” he smiles at me, but his eyes say he knows why I’m here, what I am. We stop in front of a set of huge double doors. Thomas pulls one open and says, “Good evening, Miss Ferro.”
I step through the door and stop. Blinking rapidly, I try to get my eyes to adjust to the light. I glance around at an empty ballroom. There’s a grand piano in the opposite corner. Sean is sitting in front of it, playing. I don’t move. For a moment, I just watch him play. Sean’s eyes are closed and his dark hair hangs down over his brow. His body moves to the music like they’re one and the same. The song is so somber, so dark. It tugs at my heart. I have to remind myself what Sean is, what he’s done. But as I watch him play, I don’t want to. I can’t think about it. I don’t have that luxury. I have to do this to survive. Sean’s life is his to mess up. I tell myself that If Sean wants to sleep with hookers instead of his wife that it’s none of my business, but I’m not that cold. I hate the idea of being the other woman, the girl that ruins a family. But that’s what I am, a plaything with a high price tag.
Slowly, I pad across the room. The cold tiles chill my bare feet. Sean is still playing the lament when I come up behind him. It’s a song I know well. I slip onto the bench and place my fingers on the keys. Sean glances at me, but he doesn’t stop playing. I move my fingers with his, playing with him. Our shoulders brush together occasionally as I reach in front of him to press a key. Sean’s blue gaze cuts to the side. He watches me as he plays. Neither of us says anything. When the song ends we both sit there, staring straight ahead.