I nod slowly. “Yeah, we’re good, or close enough. Gooder, maybe.”
The tension in Marty’s shoulders lessens. I rip off a piece of my roll and hand it to him. Marty pops it into his mouth. “Would you like to come with me? I’m pretty sure the boat isn’t full.”
“Can’t. I have to work this afternoon.”
“Oh.” Marty goes silent. It’s like I took an ax to the conversation and killed it.
“Want to come to dinner with me and Mel later? We’re IHOP-ing it.”
“Yeah, sounds great. I’ll have worked up a manly appetite by then, and will have a serious craving for some crepes.” I laugh again and hand him another piece of my roll. Marty pops it into his mouth and says, “Don’t hang out here by yourself for too long.”
“Because of the bodies in the marsh? Marty that was a long time ago. No one is going to kill me.”
“No, because I don’t want the ghosts of the dead hookers to show up and give you tips.”
I smack his shoulder hard and Marty fakes falling to the side. I grab his arm and pull him back before he really falls off the dock. I punch his arm lightly. It had been a teasing gesture between us once. I wonder if we’ll ever have that back. The corner of my mouth tips up and I shake my head, laughing lightly. “Asshole.”
“I told you I’m not gay. You can call me dick, now.” He says it proudly, like I’m a dick should be plastered on his tee shirt.
“Go catch your boat, dick. They’re going to leave without you.” I shake my head as Marty jumps up. He looks down the dock to where his boat is boarding. A large scruffy man hollers last call.
“See you later?”
“Yeah.”
When did my life turn to shit? Was it before or after I met Black? I’m not sure anymore. It seems that I traded one set of problems for another.
As I watch Marty board his boat, regret squeezes my ribcage with its giant hands. I wish things could go back to the way they were. Life before Black was less complicated. I was poor, but I had friends. Now I have the cash I need to do what I want, but I’ve damaged all of my relationships—and my heart.
CHAPTER 5
When I get back to the room, Amber is gone. Relieved, I jump in the shower and let the scalding water turn me lobster-colored. When I get out, I step from the tiny bathroom with a towel around my body and dripping hair. I seriously need to do wash because there never seems to be enough towels.
My phone chirps, so I walk over to it. Tucking a damp piece of hair behind my ear, I look down at the text message, hoping beyond reason that it’s Sean and that he’s changed his mind. But when I lift it and look at the screen, it isn’t. Hope is stupid. It keeps making me do irrational things. Sean isn’t coming back for me—he’s gone. I need to accept it and move on.
There’s a picture of Marty holding a tiny fish with his yellow gloves. It makes me smile. He’s such a dork, but I know he sent it to try and cheer me up.
Mel plows through the door, and looks up at me. “Where the hell do you think we live? In fucking Banjo-land? Lock your damn door, Avery. I could have been a serial killer for Chrissakes.”
“Or Naked Guy.” Mel and I shudder in unison as our faces scrunch up in disgust. I grab my brush and start on my hair. “He offered to do me after Amber this morning. Real classy.”
“You want me to show him my mad ninja skills with knives? That’ll turn him whiter than he already is.” Mel grins like she’s thinking about something specific, which is a little bit scary.
“You don’t need to cut anyone for me. I’m good.” I flip my hair over and brush it out. “I’ll take a rain check.”
“Oh? You got plans or something?”
Flipping my hair back, I nearly fall over. Mel laughs at me as I blink and steady myself. “Nah, it’s just Black. She kind of scares the crap out of me.”
Mel makes a sound of agreement and plops down on my bed. It’s still made and looked pretty before Mel rolled on it. She kicks off her shoes and pulls her feet up. “So, I guess now that Psycho Romeo is gone, you want out? All that talk this morning was just talk, right?”
“I can’t quit. I need enough money to finish grad school.” Mel doesn’t say anything, but her expression speaks for her. She thinks that I should leave. “I’m going to load up my schedule now, sign a bunch of contracts, and then bust my ass in summer sessions. I have to prove to the university that I can handle the graduate work.”
“How many contracts are you going to sign? I never sign more than one at a time. It seems too risky and Black isn’t someone you mess around with, Avery. That’s a seriously bad plan.”