“You’re going to watch it later.”
I laugh, like that’s most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard. “No, I’m not.”
“You will. You’ll beg me to see it.” Sean’s gaze is so dark, so intense. Fear is crushing into me.
My voice quivers. “No, I won’t.”
He smiles and sits next to my head. “Last chance, Smitty.”
“I’m not leaving, Jones.”
Sean touches my cheek gently. “All right. I’ll see you when this is over.” He pulls a blindfold from his pocket. My heart explodes in my chest when he ties it over my eyes and the world goes black. It makes the claustrophobia worse. Sean knew it would. I hear his voice, but it sounds far away. My pulse pounds harder. Sean is gentle this time. I wonder how long it’ll stay this way. His voice is closer when it finally registers. “Open your mouth.”
I do as he asks, not sure what to expect. Nerves flutter through my stomach, making me queasy. My mind is screaming at me, telling me that I’m going to die. I try to ignore my bonds, but it feels like they’re searing into my skin. There’s no way to forget that I’m tied down, even if I attempt to ignore it. I breathe through my mouth when I feel the gag slip between my lips. He tugs it hard and the smooth fabric gets forced to the back of my mouth. Sean ties it tightly. The amount of fabric in my mouth makes it feel like there’s no air, like I can’t breathe.
Panic surges through me, stronger this time. Mentally, I know I can breathe, but I feel like I can’t. My wrists twitch, making the straps pull tighter. I can’t slow my heartbeat. I can’t picture a meadow and mentally escape to somewhere else. Sean took every fear I have and rolled them together. I can’t calm down. Anxiety races through me in an avalanche. I try to thrash and pull away, but the only thing I can move is my head.
Sean’s voice comes from behind me. He says something that I can’t make out when I feel my skirt lift. His hands cup my ass and he feels my smooth skin before pressing his hips against my butt. “Calm down or you’ll hyperventilate. You can breathe, Avery. Slow down. Focus on my touch, on my hands.”
Fear is strangling me. I try to stop, I try to do what Sean says. The roaring in my ears makes it so much worse. I hate being confined. You’re trapped. You’re trapped. You’re trapped. The words have been on repeat since he tied me down. I didn’t even realize what I was thinking until I tried to focus on his touch. The words ring hollowly in my mind as I try to focus on Sean’s hands. One is on each side of my thigh, sliding slowly up the outside of my leg. He must be kneeling next to me because I can feel his breath on my legs. Sean rubs his hands up and down, one finger at a time. I gain control of my breathing again. The panic recedes. The only thing I can feel is the cold fear that’s frozen in my stomach and Sean’s hot touch on my bottom.
Something cold touches my hip and I wince. Sean drags its point over my hip, gently scraping my skin. It’s sharp, but he doesn’t cut me. The threat is there, the fact that I’m at his mercy isn’t lost on me. I don’t trust anyone, but somehow I volunteered to be tied to Sean’s bed and let him do this to me.
He loves me. The metal bites into my skin slightly and is gone.
“Breathe,” Sean commands. His hand is on my back, waiting for me to do it. Slowly, I inhale and let the air fill my lungs. I let it out slowly and do it again. “Good girl.”
Sean’s hand is gone. I try to focus on breathing and forget about everything else, but it’s hard. I want to rip my arms out of the restraints. Nervous energy lines my arms and legs. It’s pouring into my stomach like a tidal wave. I forget what will happen and pull my arms. The tug tightens all four restraints. I whimper into the gag and blink frantically behind the blindfold.
For a moment, I freak-out thinking that Sean left me tied to the bed alone, but then I feel his hand on my hip. He slides his palm over my bare skin and loops his thumbs around my panty. I hear a metallic snip, then another, and the little scrap of fabric is gone. I’m so tense that I don’t know what I want. I should have asked how long this would take. I thought I could do it, but now I don’t know. My pulse pounds harder, faster. I can barely breathe. My tongue is shoving the gag, trying to make more room in my mouth.
Warm palms slowly inch up the V of my legs. At first I can barely feel Sean’s touch, but as he gets closer to the top of my thighs, I squirm. My hips jerk to the side, but I don’t fall. I’m still in my heels, with my dress fanned around me, pulled up, exposing me.
I have no idea what’s going to happen next, but suddenly everything takes a turn. Sean’s hand lands hard on my bottom, stinging the skin. The unexpected hit makes me yelp into the gag. My hands ball into fists, but I can’t move. I’m not used to being hit. I don’t like it. My instinct is to hit back, but I can’t. Before I have time to think, Sean’s elbow is on my back. The air is forced out of my lungs at the same time his hand grips my pussy. He finds me quickly and forces his fingers inside. I’m dry, not ready for him. Sean thrusts another finger inside, stretching me. He pushes in and out fast, over and over again while I struggle to breathe.