Emma protests, “I have a class after this.”
“Then go, I’ll show you another time. Avery, come with me.” Dr. Pratz is out the door before I have my books. I chase after him. He’s so damn tall that it takes forever to catch up. When I fall in step with him, he looks over at me. “I can see it, you know.”
I already know what he means. He knows I’m messed up. There’s no guessing for guys like him. It’s communicated without saying a word. “I know.”
“Do you want help?”
I stare straight ahead and clutch my books to my chest. “No one can help me.”
“Mmmm. A word of caution then—ghosts will haunt us unless we confront them. Until then, they have a way of invading every aspect of our lives and ripping it apart at the seams.”
“Like a poltergeist.”
“Exactly.” We approach a door and he pulls it open, allowing me to walk inside first. It’s the school’s counseling center.
This is where I want to do my graduate work. If I continue to work for Black, I can start this summer. I’m excited and nervous to be here. I want to help people, but I need so much help myself. It really makes me wonder if I can do it. For a while, I thought all that pain would make me better at this job, but now I’m not so sure. Sometimes pain just hurts.
Dr. Pratz walks to the front desk, grabs his messages, and I follow him back to his office. “Sit.”
I’m not sure what he wants, but I take a seat. “Avery, I know you want to be admitted to the grad school next year. It’s a very rigorous program and I honestly have concerns about you being able to carry the course load.”
This is news to me. Panic sparks to life in the pit of my stomach. “I can do it. I know I can. I maintained my GPA for undergrad. I had a bump, but I recovered.”
He presses his palms together and looks at me for a moment. His dark eyes show nothing but concern, but it still makes my stomach dip. “You’re right. Earlier this year, your grades were lacking. They improved, but I feel like you have some issues distracting you from your course work. Is it something you want to talk about?” I shake my head and give him an awkward smile. “If you ever want to talk, I’m here. I want to see you excel, Avery.”
“I’ve found a way to begin grad school this summer. I can take a lighter course load, but attend year round, if you think that I should. Dr. Pratz, I really need this. I’ve worked so hard to get here. I promise that I’ll give it my undivided attention.”
“Avery, I like the idea of you spreading out your course load over the summer. Maybe that would allow you to lighten your work schedule. Your graduate scholarship is still being determined. The next few months are important. Attending this summer might be a very good option for you. One of the things you need to learn is to set reasonable expectations for yourself. If you constantly stretch yourself thinner and thinner, you’ll snap.”
“Yes sir.”
We chat for a few more moments, and by the time I leave his office, I realize that my future plans may be beyond my reach. I need to ask Miss Black for fewer appointments and more money.
CHAPTER 7
The weather has turned frigid. Big thick flakes are falling from the sky as I trek across campus. When I finally get back to the room, Amber is cursing, getting ready for her night class. She tugs a sweater over her head and glares at me. “I hate the snow.”
“Then move to Florida.” Amber scowls and hurries out the door.
I sit on my bed for a moment. When I was younger snow made me so excited, so happy. As soon as there was enough snow covering the ground, I do the same thing every single time—built a snowman. I wonder if it’s crazy, if I should do things like that anymore. I walk across the room to the window and look outside. It’s still snowing. A smile slowly spreads across my face. Screw it. I don’t care if people think I’m crazy. I’m going.
Taking my book bag, I dump out the contents on my bed before heading over to my dresser. I grab what I need and make my way down to my car. I still can’t believe Sean repaired it for me. I grin at the old girl and pat the hood like she’s a horse. “I would have missed you.”
I slip inside and turn the key. The car starts right up. The interior is new and shiny even though it’s decades old. I run my fingers along the dashboard, wondering if Sean changed anything else. It looks new. I slide the control across and turn on the heater. I keep my hand on the lever, expecting to get blasted with white smoke, but it never comes. He fixed the heater. I smile to myself. I’m not wearing a jacket. It’s like Sean knew that and had the heater repaired. Normally, all the heat would have gone out the window, but it doesn’t. My window is up. I lean forward and roll it down.