The Alpha’s Desire 4(43)

 

 

 

“Déjà vu set in, swept me away, as I moved into an Alice in Wonderland moment, feeling sucked down the rabbit hole. I was so stunned, I probably wouldn’t have been shocked if the Mad Hatter had showed up and offered me tea. I’d probably just say ‘thank you’ and actually drink it without even asking what was in my cup,” I blathered on.

 

 

 

“I love how your mind works,” he said, staring at me in amazement rather than like I’d lost my mind.

 

 

 

“Really?”

 

 

 

“Really. I know you are a writer and all, but the way you connect things in your head as a tool to explain them is just astounding. This moment does seem pretty unbelievable, given what we’ve gone through to get here. I mean, when we saw it in the dream, it wasn’t so strange for me, having been here before, knowing I was on my way back. But, now that I feel like I was on the brink of death and have survived, even cheated it maybe, it is more fantastic. I honestly, for a time, for hours and hours, never thought I would get to witness that dream in reality with you. Being taken, having my ability to heal taken away, it put things in perspective. When you look death in the eye, stare at it as time seems to stand still…” he left off when his gravelly voice hitched.

 

 

 

“It’s okay, Lex. We are here now. We made it. Why don’t we sit down a minute? Just take a pause, a breather. The grass looks as soft as a carpet anyway.”

 

 

 

He only nodded at me, but let me lead him to the last tree. He followed suit when I sat down, him leaning back against the tree and pulling me back to lean against him. I snuggled into his arms. Just like this morning, I couldn’t get close enough. Every moment with him since I’d gotten him back from that warehouse had felt the same, like I wanted to just dissolve into him, and be one person, one unit, just to be able to breath.

 

 

 

“One part of the dream hasn’t come to pass yet. I can’t change into a wolf and run with you here,” I said, trying to prevent my own mind from sorting through those grave images of that dark, bloody warehouse.

 

 

 

“In time, that will happen. I’m sure. Knowing you, you will have learned it all in half the time it would take anyone else to,” he remarked.

 

 

 

“Should I slow down then, prolong our stay here?” I asked, or more suggested, joking, though as I’d spoken the words, they’d seemed a damn good plan.

 

 

 

“It would be nice to stay here. It is such an escape from the day to day realities of New York, let alone the paranormal battles. They gave us an open-ended invitation. I have nothing to get back to. Speaking of home, you ready to tell me about your short conversation with Chloe yet? I know you were pretty upset afterward, so I understand if you still don’t want to talk about it.”

 

 

 

“There honestly isn’t much to tell. She wouldn’t really talk to me. She’s pissed, and I get it. My lies of vacation and having the time of my life, losing track of days, only says I forgot about her. Friends don’t do that. I don’t do that. So it has to hurt. Since I have no way of ever telling her the truth, I don’t know what will become of us. It hurts to think about, and right now, there is just already too much to think about.”

 

 

 

“I get it,” he said softly, always ready with a kiss to soothe me.

 

 

 

“Will the true werewolves just be waiting for us if we go back there? I really can’t lose you again. I don’t know if I can fight anymore. I mean, of course I will, would do it all again for time with you, if that is where we need to be for some reason, but I don’t want to have to. I never want to know that feeling of being without you, of worrying myself sick that I might lose you. It makes me never want to return.”

 

 

 

“As of right now, I don’t see why we have to ever return, and I know we don’t have to think about it,” he offered.

 

 

 

“The worst of that time, when you were in that warehouse, was our connection. I mean, it was the best of it, too, to know you were alive, but to feel how badly you suffered... Of course, how can I say that when you were the one actually suffering?”

 

 

 

“We both suffered, greatly,” he responded, his voice deep, each word clipped.

 

 

 

“I have never been so afraid in my life. I had this uncontrolled weapon inside me as we moved through dark rooms, and those stairs, ahh, and I am so afraid of heights. And it only got much, much worse from there. The stairs were the least of it, seeing wolves and vampires tear into each other just inches from me. I don’t even like sports. I knew the bad guy, what they’d done, and yet, though my brain knew who to root for, my heart couldn’t handle it.”