I smelled the decay the closer we got to the building, and it only reminded me of death, of loss. I could practically taste it, along with the arid smoke that wafted to us at times from the fires in the trash cans on the ground outside the building. Bile rose up, but I swallowed hard to keep down what little I’d managed to eat.
All the while, my hands begged to grab onto something, anything to ground me. Craving stability in this moment, all I felt was the tingle of my power. A light grew from my hands, alerting the crowd I moved with before I could shove them in the pockets of my pants. I wrinkled my nose, pursing my lips, my frustration easily readable. To have so little control over oneself, especially of something potentially dangerous that lived inside of you, was unnerving, bordering on insanity at a time like this.
I’m not cut out for this life, I cried out in my head. I thought life didn’t give one more than they could handle, and yet, mine just keeps doing just that, repeatedly.
“You okay?” Nira asked.
“Yeah. It’s just coursing through me, this power. Sorry. I didn’t expect to see it. I’ll keep my hands hidden until I need to use them.”
She nodded at me as we moved along. My brief light show had caused a few near me to stop, causing the herd of us to stumble a bit. In an instant, though, these paranormal creatures with grace and great abilities recovered, and continued the cautious and stealthy, steady move toward their prey. Even though I, too, walked straight, sandwiched really with no other choice, I still felt like I wasn’t walking in quite a steady fashion.
The word ‘trap’ echoed in my mind the closer we got to the building. The possibility that none of us would make it out alive grew in my mind, hovered throughout my body, until I just moved, not really feeling anything namable, just a barrage of emotions that made no sense any longer. I looked around, truly unseeing, on instinct, in accordance with those around me.
I didn’t know how my life had come to this moment. Yes, true love could push anyone to do insane things, but this seemed somehow beyond anything I’d ever imagined outside of fiction. I was living out a moment in a book. If I had read the scene of this moment, I’d have gotten through it by telling myself it wasn’t possible, not in real life. Still, here I was, off to rescue my lover from the tower, not an evil witch, but a dark werewolf having taken him. Ludicrous, definitely. True, unfortunately yes.
Yet, here I was, surrounded by paranormals, who not only understood my plight, my need to have Lex back, but who I knew would have been out here after him, to save him, with or without me. This fight of theirs between the true and the Royal werewolves had begun long before me and Lex had fallen in love. We were just now a convenient play, a pawn in their game. Having me upped the ante, getting them a source of the Royal magic as well as a bargaining chip for what they wanted. With my shortcoming being new to it, I’d become what I’m sure they saw as easy prey. I cursed my mind. Its barrage of constant thoughts came in handy for a writer, but didn’t bring any sense of calm or even reason before battle.
The group paused just before the building, the vampires looking around, using their excellent vision in the night to scope out the building again as they fanned out around it. All of the parking lot lights had probably long ago burned out, but no one here in this group complained. Instead, I could hear the wolves sniffing as they moved. Me, I just relied on them, and what I could see with the partial moon.
I stood sandwiched between Nira and Alex, who stood a little too close for comfort, her arm and his furry body actually pushed against my body. Putting a weight on my torso that had me struggling for breath even more. I wouldn’t complain, though. Not at all, what with the sense of safety that came with it. Outside of holding onto hope of soon seeing Lex, their protection was all I had to get through this. I just couldn’t count on my magic with its unknowns, even if it raced through me, burning to get out. As the first group to enter, I stood on the front lines with them as others peered around, staking out the surrounding areas before we went inside.
Even this close, there wasn’t a sound or sight of any movement, of anything living outside of the homeless who luckily either slept like the dead, or, seeing this group, decided it best to play dead. If I were them, I’d have done the latter in their situation, I guessed, though I would have found it just as hard to control my breathing as I did now. Probably would have told myself it was all a hallucination.