Ohhhh. Her spirits sank to her black heels.
Lyla was telling Stuart the story of how Professor Jenkins was caught digging his nose and eating his own booger pellet today in his office when he thought no one was looking.
“Trust me,” Jeff said kindly, “eating less carbs is good for your health in the long run.”
Ah, right. Of course she knew that losing weight was probably for the better for her in the long run, but to be told so blatantly by a guy she had just known for five minutes was nothing short of mortifying.
When the waiter came and everyone ordered, she said, “Um, I’ll have a chicken soup, please. And a Caesar salad. Minus the croutons.”
Jeff nodded happily.
He said in a low voice, “Keep eating like this and you’ll be down to normal size in no time.”
Normal size? Uh, define normal.
The conversation that ensured was dominated by Lyla, who was the life of any social gathering. This was why Jessica liked to be with her – Lyla talked enough for the two of them. And Lyla was interesting. She had interesting stories to tell, interesting things she had done (like going to the Niagara Falls and rafting there), interesting anecdotes she always managed to fashion into a punchline.
The food came, but Jessica barely had any appetite. She was so afraid of what Jeff might think if she gulped her soup and salad down.
Lyla gazed at Jessica’s entrée.
“Salad?” she said knowingly.
“I’m, uh, trying to cut down on carbs.”
“I know a gym near campus,” Jeff said helpfully. “It’s amazing what forty-five minutes a day on a treadmill will do.”
Lyla froze. Uh oh, Jessica thought.
“What did you say?” Lyla demanded.
“Lyla, he was just trying to be helpful,” Stuart put in hurriedly.
“Lyla, it’s OK,” Jessica begged.
“I was just suggesting to Jessica here that she should cut down on her food intake and increase her exercise.”
Lyla bridled. “You’ve barely met her and already you’re telling her what to do with her life?”
“Uh, Lyla,” Stuart said again.
Lyla ignored him. “You have a lot of nerve, buddy,” she said to the bewildered Jeff. “Jessica here has been worried sick all day about what you’d think about her body size and she has been going all out to make an effort for you.”
The diners at the other tables turned, listening to Lyla’s rather loud diatribe with interest. OK, I can officially vanish now, Jessica thought. She sank down in her seat.
“But what do you do? You waltz in here and criticize her the first chance you get. Do this, eat that, don’t do this, don’t eat that. Do you realize what that does to a person? You don’t even know her, buddy. You don’t know that she’s the kindest, sweetest thing to ever come out of Brocton, Mississippi. You don’t know that she can make the best red velvet cake outside The Plaza in New York City and play three different musical instruments.”
Actually it was one, Jessica thought faintly.
“I’m sorry,” Jeff said in a small voice. He eyed Jessica. “I’m sorry,” he squeaked again. “I was just trying to help. All that padding you’re carrying can’t be good for your Framington Score index.”
“Jeff’s in pre-med,” Stuart put in.
“I don’t care if he’s in after-med!” Lyla stormed. “He either treats my best friend right or we both walk out.”
“Hold on,” Stuart said desperately, “that’s kind of drastic.”
A funny look came over Jeff’s face. He threw down his napkin and stood up. He glared at Stuart. “You know, I don’t have to take this from your girlfriend. I came here today because you begged me to. And you know what? She’s not the type of girl I’d date. No offence, but I believe that anyone who doesn’t try to lose weight when she’s still in her teens has no self-control. And I don’t want to date someone like that.”
He stalked off.
Jessica’s cheeks burned.
“Uh, Jeff?” Stuart glanced at Lyla and then scurried after his cousin.
“Fine, go after him,” Lyla remarked. “You don’t need someone like that, Jess. You’re fine the way you are and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. If you’re going to lose weight, you’re going to do it on your own terms and not someone else’s. Got that?”
THE WEBSITE
Oh yeah, that went well, Jessica thought. Particularly when everyone else in the restaurant was staring at them and smirking.
She was holed up in the room she shared with Lyla. She had totally refused to go out since the disastrous blind date. Because that was what it was – an epic scale disaster. OK, maybe not that epic like in a typhoon sort of way, but it made her feel like creeping into the closet and hiding behind her oversized winter clothing and never coming out till the semester was over.