Tessa's Escape to Athena's Ground(89)

                The Randal had a small lobby marketers would describe as “intimate” and only one elevator bank. She was grateful. There was little chance David could slip past her.

                “There’s a little café two doors down, on the right as you exit. I’ll be there if you need me,” Russell said. “When I’ve had some breakfast, I’ll bring you something to eat. Any requests?”

                “Coffee and a muffin or croissant,” Tessa said. Her stomach was too tense to eat much, but she knew she’d need something.

                There were only three small groupings of chairs in the lobby. Each group offered a couple of reasonably comfortable chairs and a small coffee or end table. Tessa took a chair with a good view of the elevators and registration desk.

                Time passed slowly. It felt like Russell had been gone hours, not minutes, when he returned with a cup of coffee and a buttery croissant stuffed with bits of ham and cheese. “I’ll watch for David if you need to use the ladies room,” he said, setting Tessa’s breakfast on the end table next to her chair.

                “I’m good, thanks.” But his offer brought up something she hadn’t considered. The presence of ‘the other man’ would only aggravate David, so having Russell hang out with her in the lobby wasn’t an option. But she couldn’t sit for hours and hours without food and bathroom breaks. “I don’t think it would be smart to have you wait with me.”

                Russell nodded.



                             “But if David sleeps in, I could be here quite a while. I might need some more food and a bathroom break or two.”

                “Not a problem. Hand me your cell phone.” As he entered his name and cell phone number in Tessa’s phone, he suggested she text him if she needed a break or had a problem.

                “Where will you be?” Tessa’s earlier confidence was gone, her face pale and eyes dark.

                “Within a quick walk. You text and I’ll come running.”

                Tessa munched on her croissant and sipped coffee. An hour that felt like ten passed before she recognized the person emerging from the elevator. Her heart beat as if a wild bird was trapped inside her chest. She stepped up to David, whose back was to her as he studied a rack of tourist brochures.

                “David, can we talk for a few minutes?”

                David turned around to face her, and for a second Tessa thought he would run. “I think I said everything I needed to last night.”

                “You may have, but I didn’t.” Tessa gently touched his hand, and he pulled it away. “Sorry.”

                All the beautiful words Tessa thought she had committed to memory were gone. As she stood before David, and the pain and anger on his face, all she had was what remained in her heart.

                “I care about you. The last thing I want is to cause you pain, but I did, and for that I am deeply, deeply sorry.”

                David stared, but didn’t respond. Tessa thought she should be grateful he wasn’t running or screaming, but something about cold silence made everything feel even worse.

                “What you saw last night wasn’t what you think.”

                He raised his eyebrows like she’d just told him the sun didn’t rise from the east.

                “Well, it was what you think, but not why you think.” Damn! Where were those beautiful words now? She searched his eyes, hoping for a spark of sweet David, but only saw sparks. She said the only thing she could, the unvarnished truth: “What you saw last night was me preparing for a visit from my sex therapist. A therapist, David, not a lover. None of the traditional talk therapists I saw in New York helped. I was desperate. I didn’t want to try suicide again, but my life sucked and I knew something drastic had to happen.”