Tender Is The Night(50)

She wasn't ready to say good-bye yet, but Devin was gone before she  could ask him to wait. And maybe that's the way it had to be. She'd done  everything she could do to help him close the case. The last of it was  up to him.



* * *



Tuesday morning, Devin skipped his run and went to the cemetery just  south of the city. It was a beautiful piece of land that overlooked the  ocean. He put a bouquet of flowers on Sam's grave and then knelt down  next to her gravestone.

"It's over, Sam. The person who killed you is dead. I know what happened  now. I wish I could say that looking back I can see what we missed,  where we went wrong, but I can't. Lindsay was clever. She didn't fit the  profile, just as you said. I guess Rick must have told you about her  before you left me that message. Anyway, Lindsay had a grudge that none  of us could have figured out. Not even her mother knew what was going on  in her head." He paused. "I just wish I would have been with you when  Rick called you. Maybe I could have saved you. Or maybe not. You were  good at your job, Sam. Hell, you were better than me. I just wish I'd  gotten to you before the fire did."

He breathed through the last lingering waves of pain.

"But it's done. Justice is served. Your mom is going to be better, I  think. The uncertainty and the doubts were making her life difficult,  and I was to blame for that. I was the one who kept pushing for the  truth. I was right, of course," he said, smiling to himself, thinking  Sam was probably smiling at his cockiness-wherever she was. "But I made  things harder on your family. I'm sorry about that. I hope they can heal  now."

He looked out at the ocean, then back at the gravestone. "You're  probably wondering what I'm going to do about Kate. I don't know. What  can I do? She has a life to lead, a life I want her to lead, because  it's her dream. I can't stand in the way of her dreams."         

     



 

For a moment he thought he heard Sam's voice, asking him about his dreams, but maybe that was just his subconscious talking.

"I don't know what I want anymore," he said. "For the last year and a  half, it's only been about this case. I haven't thought past it. Now, I  guess I have to move on. I'm going to miss you, Sam."

The wind lifted his hair, and he felt as if Sam was answering him back.

And that whimsical thought probably came from having spent way too much time with Kate and her idealistic view of life.

He stood up. "Rest in peace, sweet Sam."

He walked away from the grave and paused on the edge of the bluff,  looking out on the shimmering blue water of the Pacific Ocean.

The infinite horizon opened up his head. There was a bigger world out there than the one he'd been living in.

So what was he going to do now?





Twenty-Two


"I'm not sick, Mom," Kate protested, as her mother delivered a tray of  her favorite breakfast foods to her bed. She'd finally gone home after  the fire the day before, and her mother had been spoiling her ever  since.

"You're recovering from a traumatic event, and I get to take care of you for a little while, so suck it up."

She smiled and took a bite of the chocolate chip pancake. "Oh, my God,  still as good as ever. But I feel like I'm five years old again."

"I wish you were five years old, and I could know where you were every second of the day. I could make sure you were safe."

"You have to trust that I can take care of myself, that you raised me right-which you did, by the way."

Her mother shook her head. "Why do you have to do such a dangerous job?"

"It's not usually dangerous, and it's because I'm a Callaway. I was  raised to serve and protect. I want to do my part to make the world a  better place."

"I'm proud of you, Kate, but I still don't like to see you hurt."

"I just have a few scratches. A little makeup, and I'll be fine for the wedding photos."

"I'm not worried about that. I just know that you don't always tell me when you're hurting."

"I'm not hurting. I'm fine."

"Then why are there shadows in your eyes?"

"I'm still a little tired. I didn't sleep well last night."

"Were you thinking about the fire, or were you thinking about Devin?  Your father told me it was all a ruse, but I saw something between you  and Devin when you were here together. So fess up. Is it a fake  relationship or a real one?"

"I like him, Mom," she admitted.

"Why do you make that sound like a bad thing?"

"Because I have to leave after the wedding. I can't quit my job because I like some guy."

"He's not some guy, and do you have to leave your job? Have you talked to him about moving?"

She shook her head. "No, we've been focused on the case. In fact, Devin  has thought of nothing else the last year and a half. I'm not sure what  he's going to do with his life now that the obsession is over."

"It sounds like you both have some decisions to make. I know you don't want my advice … "

"I actually wouldn't mind your advice," she said.

"Really?" Her mom looked pleased at that thought.

"I do value your opinion."

"Good. I know you like to make your own decisions and that you treasure  your independence, but I also know that love and family are just as  important to you as a career. I've always told you that you shouldn't  settle for less than everything you want, and I still believe that.  That's how I got your dad."

"You and Dad were living in the same town and wanted the same things."

"Your dad was a hotshot firefighter when I met him. He was brash and  cocky and quite the ladies man. But once he met me, that changed. Well,  he was still brash and cocky at times, but he was all mine. If Devin is  the right man for you, then everything is going to work out."

"How do I know if he's the right man?"

Sharon smiled. "You already know. You just have to be honest with yourself. Now eat your pancakes."

"Thanks, Mom-not just for the pancakes-for everything." Her thoughts  drifted to Lindsay and Eileen and how troubled their relationship had  been. She'd been fortunate to have such a wonderful mother. "I want you  to know I appreciate you so much. I was lucky to have you as a mom."

"Well, that's very nice to hear, and you're welcome. And since you're  done with your case now, we could use your help with the wedding. So  when you finish eating, come downstairs and I'll put you to work."

"I thought you were going to spoil me awhile longer."

Her mom laughed. "Like you said, you're fine. See you soon, honey."


         

     



 
* * *



When Kate got downstairs, she found her mom sitting on a couch in the living room, and she wasn't alone.

"Look who's here," Sharon said with a knowing smile, tipping her head toward Devin.

"Devin, I was going to call you. I know we need to wrap things up," she said.

"I'll leave you two to do that," Sharon said, as both she and Devin got to their feet. "Devin, don't forget what I said."

"I won't," he promised.

"What was that about?" Kate asked suspiciously, as her mom left them alone.

"Nothing. How are you?"

She sat down on the couch, and he took the seat beside her. "I'm good. What about you?"

"Same."

"Really?" She searched his face for the truth, but she couldn't quite read his expression. "How did it go with the Parkers?"

"It was difficult," he admitted. "There were a lot of tears, a lot of questions, but I think it was healing."

"For you, too?" she asked quietly.

"It's still sinking in, but yes, I feel like a big weight is off my  chest. I just wanted to get justice for Sam. I didn't want her to have  died while the arsonist was still running free. I didn't want anyone  else to get hurt."

"I know. I saw that from the first time we met. Your motives were never in question for me."

"I'm glad." He paused. "I went by the hospital last night; I saw Eileen.  She has a concussion, and she's devastated and heartbroken, but she  will recover."

"Physically maybe; I don't know about emotionally. Lindsay really hated  her, and perhaps for good reason. Maybe Eileen did know about the abuse  and just pretended it wasn't happening."

"I don't know. She told me that Lindsay had only mentioned something  about her father touching her inappropriately after he died, and she  didn't know what to make of it. She thought Lindsay was acting out in  her grief. But that could just be the nice story she told herself so she  would feel better. Anyway, she was released this morning, and she's  going to her sister's house. I'm sure all the agencies will be following  up with her."

"Are they going to have a funeral for Lindsay?"

"She wants to have a small service, just the immediate family. Lindsay  was still her daughter." He put out a hand and gently touched her cheek.  "I hope these cuts won't scar."

"They're not very deep."