For the first time, I’m not fighting him or the feelings he’s bringing out of me. As tears mist my eyes, I whisper against his lips, “Do you feel that?”
He just nods and presses his lips to mine, eagerly sliding his tongue into my mouth. He causes moans to erupt inside of my throat and vibrate into his mouth as our tongues intertwine.
Wanting to grab this moment with both hands before it has a chance to slip away, Jordon swiftly jumps to his feet, lifting me up and hugging me against his chest. I wrap my legs tightly around his back, lock my ankles together and hook my arms around his neck.
Within seconds, he’s climbing the stairs of my deck and making his way into my house. All I can do is laugh and wave to the guys and Roxie as they watch us disappear up the stairs towards my bedroom.
Entering the bathroom and dropping my feet onto the tile floor, Jordon begins stripping his clothing off. With a sly smile on his lips, slips me out of my skirt and top.
“We’re going to fuck in this shower. Then again in your bed, where you’re going to fall asleep curled in my arms. When we wake up in the morning, we’re going to do it all over again. Do we have an understanding?”
A shiver slides down my spine and stops at my heart. It’s now thumping so fiercely against my ribs I think there’s a good chance it’s going to bust straight through and onto my bathroom floor.
Nodding, I bite nervously on my lip as I allow all my reservations to float away. A calm settles over me as I stand naked in my bathroom under the intense stare of Jordon’s piercing blue eyes.
Before I have a second to change my mind, Jordon grabs my hand and leads me into the shower.
Tonight is a turning point for us. I have Roxie to thank for it. Without her words smacking me hard in the face I would still be living in denial.
I don’t know what this will mean once we’re both sober in the morning, but for the first time I’m not allowing myself to worry about what tomorrow will bring.
Will You Be My Valentine?
Jordon
It’s been three days since Brittan, and I talked on the beach, opening up to each other for the first time. I have never in my life been so damn nervous. I was pouring my heart out to her and preparing for Brittan to stomp on it and throw it out into the ocean for the sharks to eat. Instead, she shocked me by confessing she felt the same.
Brittan is a very complicated chick. I know that she’s worth it. My bandmates think I’m crazy settling down. Well, all except Lawson. He’s happy that he won’t be the only one not whoring around backstage every night. Kingston and Zane, on the other hand, are pissed they’re losing a wingman.
They just don’t get it. I don’t think they ever will until they meet that one girl who shakes their entire world, making them feel like they’re nothing without her in it.
With Brittan, it started out as fun casual sex, but with each passing day we’ve spent together while on this tour, it’s slowly developed into something more. I don’t want to be the friend she fucks on the side and then goes to after parties and randomly hooks up with other guys.
I want her all to myself.
We’ve spent the last three days at her beach house in Malibu. It’s been fun, all of us just chilling at the beach, Bar-B-Qing, drinking, and just hanging out. We’ve grown into one big ass family of crazy rockers, and I love it. This tour has turned into something I could never have imagined.
Brittan’s best friend Roxie stayed two nights; I noticed a change in Brittan between those two days. Her friendship with Roxie is not something you see every day. They truly are best friends in every way. After talking with Roxie a bit, I can see she likes me too. I can’t help but think she had something to do with Brittan finally letting me in. I will forever be grateful to her for whatever it is she said or did.
Today is Valentine’s Day and our last night off before we load onto the buses and hit the road again. I want to spend the entire day with Brittan making sure she has fun.
It’s hard being with a woman who’s had her heart broken so severely. I want to be the one who helps her move on, but it’s difficult to do. Every time I think I’m getting Brittan to come out of the force field she’s built around herself, she seems to lock herself back inside it.
Especially on a day like today.
I imagine since she was with Cane for so many years; in her head, she has made Valentine’s Day a special day only for them.
My goal for today is to make sure Brittan has fun and doesn’t spend it with her thoughts in the past.
I want her to enjoy Valentine’s Day and to enjoy spending it with me. I do not want her to lock herself away in thoughts of a life she no longer has.