Cane:
Heading home now, see you soon.
I type in a quick reply telling him to hurry his hot ass home because I need a cuddle buddy to watch Lifetime with. I can’t help but giggle as I send it. Cane cannot stand these movies, but suffers through them for me, seeing as I suffer through many hours of college basketball.
Especially during March Madness.
Finally, thirty minutes later, Cane strolls through the door. Tossing his keys on the table beside the door and kicking off his Adidas sandals, he walks over and plops down on the couch. I shift my body upwards so I can lay my head on his chest. We spend the next hour talking about everything I’ll do while he’s deployed. We can’t set a date for our wedding, because we don’t know when he’ll be back home. It sucks because if I would’ve known he was going to be deploying again so soon after returning home, I would’ve planned our wedding during his first deployment and gotten married as soon as he returned home.
Cane trails his fingers up and down my arm, awakening goose bumps all over my heated skin. He leans down planting a kiss on my forehead. “I’m going to miss the hell outta you while I’m gone.”
Resting my chin on his chest, I look up at him and try to hold back the tears. If the dam gives, I don’t think I’ll be able to stop the waterfall of tears once they start falling. “It will go by fast. We made it through you being gone a whole year. Before we know it, you’ll be home, and we’ll finally become Mr. and Mrs. Cane Allen.”
“Just don’t hire any Duran Duran cover bands. I’ll never live down having a bad 80’s cover band at my wedding.”
“Shit, I guess I better call and cancel tomorrow.” I say, laughing as I tickle a trail from his belly button up to his chest. “How about we settle on a really good D.J., then we can have a mix of everything we love.”
“Sounds good to me. I love the sound of Mrs. Allen. It has a nice ring to it, doesn’t it?” Cane asks rolling onto his side. Sliding his fingers along my thigh and working his way under his oversized t-shirt, I’m wearing. “I think we’ve watched enough Lifetime movies for tonight. It’s about time I get your sweet little ass into bed.”
Before I can protest, Cane is scooping me up in his arms and carrying me into the bedroom. Within seconds, we are both naked and tangled up in the sheets of our bed.
December 12th 2005
I awoke yesterday to the sweetest voice mail from Cane. With the time difference, it’s hard to talk on the phone, but I love getting his voice messages because I can re-play them over and over again whenever I’m missing him. I mailed a letter to him last week, telling him all about the wedding plans along with a new care package. I hate that we won’t be spending Christmas together. All of his gifts are wrapped under our tree, where they’ll stay until he comes home to me.
Roxie, my mother, and Cane’s mom went with me to the Bridal Shop over the weekend and helped me pick out my wedding dress. We also selected Roxie’s maid of honor dress. My cousins Valerie and Tiffany are my bridesmaid’s, but because they live in Ft. Lauderdale, I had to email them the dresses I picked out for them so they can just go to the local Bridal shop and get theirs fitted there.
Cane was right, planning the wedding has helped distract me while he’s away. I’m hoping to get everything done as quickly as possible so once I know when he’s coming home all I have to do is set the date. We plan on getting married at Fairchild Tropical Botanic Garden. It’s absolutely breathtaking there. My parents helped cover the fee to hire a wedding planner, and she’s been a life saver by helping with the venues and all the details I didn’t even think about. Without her, I’d be completely lost.
Who knew planning a wedding could be so much work and stressed doesn’t come close to explaining how I’m feeling right now.
We’re on Christmas break from college, so I’m enjoying not cramming for tests. The last few weeks have been insane. Roxie and I spent every night studying, and when I received my tests back with B’s, I was happy. Hell, I didn’t get any A’s like Roxie, but I’ll take a B any day!
With Cane overseas putting his life on the line, it’s hard to focus in school. Especially when I see all of his friends on campus, and I’m reminded that he’s not here with all of us like we’d planned. I was so excited when Roxie and I were accepted into the University of Miami. We imagined ourselves, Cane, Dalton and Matt all together partying it up on the weekends at their frat house, making tons of amazing memories together. I wish every day that 9/11 never happened that so many loved ones didn’t have to leave us to go fight this war on terror.