Taming Megan(14)

“Let’s order then, I’m starving,” Josie said.

Megan barely opened her menu. “You do realize how serious this is, right?” Megan asked, leaning in as she lowered her voice to a whisper.

Josie gave her a look over her menu. “I’m having the salmon burger,” she said, sounding oblivious to Megan’s problem.

The thought of salmon made Megan’s stomach turn and she wondered if this wasn’t a mistake. But who else could she talk to about this? Not Anna. God, she couldn’t imagine what Anna would think of her if she found out what she had done.

The waiter came with their drinks and they ordered: Josie the salmon burger with fries and Megan a bowl of tomato soup. He lay a basket of bread on the table and Josie picked up a thick slice, slathering it with butter.

“So Sean Connelly, huh? You’ve got some luck, Meg. You turned one trick and here he is, walking straight back into your life,” she said, shaking her head, her attention mostly on her buttered bread as she took a big bite.

“I never turned the trick, I told you that.”

“M-hm.”

“Josie, it’s true!”

“Well, the way I see it, it doesn’t matter either way. What do you think Jake will believe? What do you think Sean is going to tell him? Besides, he wasn’t half bad from what I remember.”

Megan made a face of disgust, remembering that Josie had known Sean too. He’d even become a regular of hers for a few weeks at least.

“Aren’t you supposed to be working by the way?” Megan asked. Josie had just started a job at a Macy’s not two months ago. She didn’t have the best record when it came to holding on to work though.

She shook her head and threw her half-eaten bread onto her plate. “It didn’t work out. They’re a bunch of a-holes.”

“You said that the last time too, Jo.”

“Well, sorry we can’t all have a rich husband like you, Meggie.”

“Don’t call me that. And Jake works hard, he earns his money.”

Josie looked at her, leaning back in her chair. “I’m sorry. It’s just, you know, you’ve always had things just fall into your lap. I mean, look at you sitting pretty, you own your own business, you landed a rich husband and you look fucking amazing even when you look like shit.”

“Jo…”

“I mean, maybe it was time something caught up with you.”

Megan opened her mouth in disbelief, trying to make sense of her friend’s words.

“Here you are, ladies,” the waiter said, setting the plates down.

Megan took one whiff of the salmon and turned away, picking up the pack of salty crackers he’d left with her soup and opening it.

Josie took a bite of her sandwich, her appetite obviously still intact. “We all thought that, you know,” she continued talking while chewing. “Like you thought you were better than the rest of us.” She shook her head. “We were all white trash, Meg. You included. Still are.”

“I never thought I was better than anyone else. I still don’t.” Emotions were building inside her, everything on top of everything else becoming too much to bear. “I just thought I was your friend. And I thought you were mine.”

Josie must have seen it because she put her sandwich down, wiped her mouth with her napkin and reached out to pat Megan’s hand.

“Shit, I’m sorry Meg. I shouldn’t have said those things. I’m sorry, ok?”

Megan nodded, dabbing at a tear in the corner of her eye. “What am I going to do?”

“Ok, tell me exactly what he said,” Josie asked, picking up her sandwich again as she shoved two fries dripping with ketchup into her mouth.

“He said he wants one night and that I had five days to think it over.”

“Or what?”

“I don’t know, he didn’t say. I assume or else he’d tell Jake what I’d done.” She shook her head, looking away. “I don’t know. There were too many people and I was just… I didn’t expect it, you know? God, how could I have been so stupid?”

“You weren’t stupid, Meg. It was easy money.”

Megan pushed the soup away and put her crackers on the table. “And now I’m going to pay for it.”

“Think he’ll let you do that? Will he take money?”

“I don’t know. I can offer it I guess. I don’t know how I’ll get it but…”

“What do you mean you don’t know how you’ll get it? You’ll get it from Jake.”

“And tell him what?” She couldn’t even think of that.

“Lie, tell him you bought a nice new dress. Who cares?”

“I do. I can’t lie to him. I don’t want to.” She looked around at the other diners who had turned their way and she lowered her voice.

Josie rolled her eyes and shoved the last bite of her sandwich into her mouth. “Well then,” she began, finishing up her fries before wiping off her hands and tossing the napkin down on her plate. “I guess you’ll have to give him that night,” she said, looking at Megan straight on.

Megan met her gaze and for the first time, saw what was real. They might have been friends once, but she wasn’t even sure about that because what she saw in Josie’s eyes wasn’t compassion. It wasn’t warm or even close to it. And it wasn’t the opposite either. There was no emotion there, her expression was flat. Josie couldn’t have cared any less about Sean Connelly showing up in Megan’s life. In fact, she might even be just a little happy about it. Megan snorted, shaking her head and for the first time ever, Josie dropped her gaze. Megan wanted to say it was from shame at having been found out but that would be giving her too much credit.

She opened her mouth to speak, but closed it again, reaching for her wallet. She pulled out a $100 bill and tossed it on the table.

“That should cover lunch and then some. Keep the change. Goodbye Josie.”

Josie sat there staring at her as Megan pushed her chair back, stood and walked out the door. She didn’t look back once, she didn’t have to. Josie was a part of the past she wanted to let go of and this was the first step in truly doing that. This was the easy step. The next part would be much more difficult and she wasn’t sure if she’d be the one doing the walking away. The next part mattered, and in a way, she was grateful to Josie.

She unlocked her car and climbed inside, putting the key into the ignition but not turning it. She took a deep breath and looked straight ahead, clear for the first time since the night of the party.

You can’t run from your past. You can’t hide from it. If you try, it will always be there lurking around every corner, ready to pounce when you least expect it.

She realized how all her time with Jake hadn’t been based on truth or trust. At least not on her side. She loved him, she loved him so much the thought of what telling him would do to him twisted her heart and pushed tears from her eyes. But it was something she had to do. She had to tell him the truth, all of it. It was the only way to go forward. She only hoped they would be going forward together and not apart.

She checked the time. It was almost two in the afternoon. Jake would be busy but now that she had decided, she couldn’t wait. What if she lost her courage by the time he came home? She wouldn’t take that chance. She pulled out onto the road and drove to his office.







Jake tried not to make it obvious that he was checking his watch. He sat at the head of the long conference table listening to Sean Connelly carry on about matters that didn’t need half the attention he was paying them. Connelly bothered him and there was more to it than his dislike of the man as a potential business associate. Yes, Connelly was one of the few board members who hadn’t yet decided on which company would get the bid but it wasn’t only that. And besides, Jake had the majority of the votes. At least he thought so, but he also knew until the ink was dry on the contract, anything could happen.

“Sean, I understand your concerns…” Gray interrupted him. “But with all due respect…” Jake turned to look through the glass wall into the lobby, more than a little irritated with things. It was then that the door to the office opened and his wife walked inside. He watched as the receptionist greeted her and caught the expression on her face as she made her way to his office without turning to look into the meeting room where he sat. He stiffened. She never came to the office or very rarely so and only if they had a lunch appointment together. He was about to excuse himself when Sean called his name, bringing him back into the conversation.

“What’s your plan with the tower structure? It seems like an additional cost we should avoid and doesn’t serve any purpose I can see.”

The man had no eye for beauty. If it were up to him, he’d build a flat strip mall that would add nothing but be an eyesore to the community.

“Gentlemen,” Gray stood. “I’m afraid we’re discussing a moot point. At this moment, we need to concentrate on making a decision on who gets the project. These details can and will be worked out at a later time. Now I have to excuse myself. We’ve got some family coming in and no offense to all present, but I’d rather be there than here.”