“You’re shiny and clean. Wholesome and new.” Gently, he trailed his thumb over her lower lip. “And I’m…not. Not even close. The two pieces don’t fit together.”
She shook her head. “That’s where I think you’re wrong.”
“That doesn’t make you right.”
“One of us is,” she argued, flicking her tongue out at his thumb. “It might as well be me.”
His thumb pressed against her mouth. “Might as well be.” Leaning down, he kissed her. By the time he pulled back, she was even more certain she was right. He lay down beside her again, staring up at the unmoving ceiling fan. “Lydia?”
She blinked sleepily. “Yeah?”
“Thank you.” His fingers tightened on her. “Thank you…for making me talk. And for listening, without judging.”
“I’d never judge you for something you’ve done. Or anything you do.”
He flexed his jaw. “You have no idea what you’re saying right now.”
“Actually, I do. And I mean every word.”
Sighing, he rolled to his feet and stood. “I have to go. You should get some rest.”
“Can’t you stay?” she asked, leaning up on an elbow. “You don’t have to leave…”
“I-I have work to do,” he said, rubbing the back of his neck. “But we’ll talk tomorrow after…you know. Okay?”
She bit her lip and nodded. For some reason, it felt as if he was leaving her for good…instead of for tonight. “Okay.”
“Don’t look so sad.” Leaning down, he pressed a fleeting kiss to her lips. “After tomorrow, the hard part will be over. Steven will know, and I’ll be free to…well, shit. I don’t know. Walk with you in the streets. Whatever people do when they announce they’re a couple.”
Her lips twitched. “The same thing you’ve done with other girlfriends.”
“Nothing else scared you away, but this might. You see…I’ve never really had one before,” he admitted, rubbing his jaw. “But I’ll figure out what that all means after I tell Steven.”
She blinked at him. “Wait. You’ve never had a girlfriend before? Like…ever?”
“Ever. I told you that you had no idea what you were getting yourself into,” he muttered, avoiding looking at her. “Still want me to tell Steven?”
Swallowing hard, she nodded. “Of course. But can I ask one more question?”
“Yeah…”
“Why haven’t you had a girlfriend?”
“As a kid, I was kind of nerdy.” He rolled his eyes. “As if you didn’t guess as much from my love for all things geeky.”
She smiled. “Okay. And as an adult?”
“Well, I never met someone who made me want to settle down.” He gazed at her. “Not until you.”
Her heart skipped a few beats. “Oh.”
“Yeah. Oh.” He fisted his hands at his hips, staring her down, his whole body tense. He looked like he might snap if he tensed even a little bit more. “I like you, Lyd.”
Smiling, she forced herself to remain calm and cool, when she wanted to jump on the bed like a kid and shout, “He likes me!” at the top of her lungs. “I like you, too, you know.”
His muscles relaxed, and he laughed. “You don’t say?”
“I totally do.”
He grabbed his keys off the nightstand and shoved his phone into his pocket. “Then wish me luck with your brother. I’m going to need it tomorrow.”
“Stop it.” She fidgeted with the blanket. “He’s not that bad…”
“Yeah.” Holt snorted. “It’s not as if he was a SEAL or anything.”
She winced. “Okay. You might have a point.”
“I know I do. But even if he kicks my ass…” He skimmed his fingers over her bare shoulders as he passed. “It’ll be worth every bruise, sprain, or broken bone. See you tomorrow.”
Lydia watched him go, her stomach a ball of nerves and excitement. Starting tomorrow, her life would really begin. While she might have fallen for him quickly, like she had in the past, this time there was no doubt in her mind that this was right. That they were meant to be. Sometimes, people fell quickly because they just knew. And she was one of them. She’d never been happier, really, so it made her decision a no brainer. She wasn’t staying in Maine because of Holt…
But she wasn’t going anywhere.
Chapter Fifteen
The next afternoon, Holt stepped into Steven’s office and made himself smile. He’d promised to tell Steven about his feelings for Lydia at lunch, but he’d been too busy catching up on overdue work to eat. And if he was going to keep his promise to Lydia, then he needed to tell him. Now.