He paused to make sure Erica was up to speed. All the names of his family and the circumstances could be confusing, even to him.
“She was younger than my dad. She took care of us, and before we knew what was happening, my dad had married Molly.”
“This story isn’t that bad, Chris.”
“My dad has spent the last twenty-five years of his life with Molly treating her like she was second-best. Everything she does is not as good as his first wife. My dad died when my mum did. Molly has spent a great deal of time loving a man who refuses to love her back.” He stopped, licking his lips. “Four years ago, a blonde haired woman, with a sweet smile and wonderful laugh, walked into the Sinclair building looking for a job. Three years ago, a very stupid man broke her heart because he was too afraid to give himself over to love. I don’t want to make excuses, Erica. Watching my parents and Molly and seeing what love did to them, I saw it as nothing but poison, an excuse people used to hurt others. I’m not excusing what I did or said to you. What I’m saying is, now I’m wiser, and I swear I’ll never do anything cowardly again.”
Chris got out of the car, grabbed the picnic and shut the door. He leaned in the open window. “I understand if you don’t want to come. I’ll give you a few minutes, and if you want me to drive you home, come and tell me.”
****
Erica stared at his retreating back. His story was sad, but everyone had a fucked up family. She knew she couldn’t stand being near her relatives. What she needed to remember was that everyone was affected by their families’ events differently. Chris had been affected because of what he’d seen. She needed to respect that.
Rubbing her hands down her legs, she thought about the happiness she’d felt with him when she was with him. When they were alone, he had become a man she had grown to love. She still loved him. Her feelings would never change. Part of living life was putting your heart on the line. Sighing, she unbuckled her seat belt. If she went to him and asked to be taken home, she’d turn out like her mother. A bitter woman with nothing left of her other than a shell that she plied with drink. Opening the door, Erica knew she was determined not to turn out like her mother. She followed the path he’d taken. He sat on the blanket he’d laid out. Items from his basket were spread out around him. He was looking out at the ocean giving her time to gaze at him.
She sat down next to him on the blanket. Her leg rubbed against his. For several moments neither of them spoke. No one needed to say any words. They lay together, side by side, with the beach and ocean in front of them. No one was around to ruin the moment for them.
His hand went around her back, resting on her hip. The heat of his touch felt like he was touching naked skin.
“I want us to try,” she said, turning to him.
“Then we’ll try. I want you to meet my family.”
Erica laughed. “We’ll try, meaning taking things slowly, and you want me to meet your family, which is the complete opposite.”
“I love it when you prove the statement about blondes.” She knew he was teasing, and she slapped him on the chest.
“That was cruel.” He lay down, taking her with him. She gazed at the clear blue sky and the sun shining down on them.
“I’m not going anywhere this time, Erica. I want you to meet my crazy-ass family. You might run away when you meet them.”
She chuckled. “If that’s the case, you’d better meet mine.”
“I didn’t know you had family.”
“What? You thought I’d fallen out of the sky like some alien or something?”
“Or something.” He laughed. “You never talked about them, so I figured you’d lost them.”
She felt his heart beat and lifted up to look at him. “I have a family. They’re just not people you brag about.”
He ran his fingers down her cheek. Erica closed her eyes, moaning at his touch.
“I missed you,” she admitted, not only to him but to herself. He sat up, taking her lips in a sweet, tender kiss. She closed her eyes as her body came alive under his skilful touch.
Chris pulled away, cupping her face in his hand. “I’ve not been with anyone since you.”
She stared at him. Erica thought her mouth would be hanging open in disbelief at his statement. “That’s not possible. I saw the newspaper headlines about your latest conquest.”
He shook his head. “You saw what I wanted the media to see. Chris Sinclair up to his usual antics. I couldn’t touch another woman after you. I tried, but the only woman I wanted was you.”
Erica felt guilty. Even though she’d never been with another man for intercourse, she’d let Ben touch her intimately as she’d touched him.