I follow him into the ring. Since returning to the gym, I’ve only done bag work with John. I’ve used the mitts with West, but I’ve yet to really throw a punch at anyone. John holds the mitts near his head. I inhale deeply and my guard goes up. One second. Another.
I hit Matt in anger, but he struck me first and it hurt. If I didn’t fight back, would it have gone as far as it did? If I weren’t trained, would he have even hit me? Where do Matt’s choices end and mine begin? I drop my guard. “What if I can’t do it?”
John widens his arms so that the targets are at arm’s length. “Then we’ll ease you in slower. Jab, cross.” He shakes his right hand. “Then jab, cross.” And shakes his left. “Let’s warm you up.”
“Okay.” Some of the tightness unfurls. No punches toward the head. I can do this. “Okay.”
My gloves slide back to my temples and my feet rock into position. Okay.
Chapter 54
West
With Abby’s words fresh on my mind and Haley’s decision to be made, I head straight to the gym. If she’s going to butcher my heart, she can do it now, not at school.
The bags near the front door are empty, but a crowd gathers around the boxing ring. A roar of approval ripples from the guys watching the show. In the corner of the ring, Kaden slips on his headgear and gloves, then says something to Jax, who stands on the other side of the ropes. The two of them confer like a coach instructing a student.
I work through the BO-laden crowd, bobbing my head to find Haley. The guys decked out in workout clothes yell again and I discover her in the last spot I’d thought to look—the ring.
John and Haley dance around each other, a demented tango. With mitts on his hands, John aims for her head. Haley ducks and fires back with machine-gun punches to the mitts near his face: double jab, right hook to the head. John grunts with each punch, just like Haley does with me—keeping up the tempo, rewarding her for the hit.
Haley is lean and gorgeous with a sheen of sweat over her body. Her long hair is gathered together at the nape of her neck and her face is barely visible from the headgear and with her held guard. There’s a lethalness about Haley. It’s more than the way her shoulders roll forward and how fast she strikes. It’s the serious gleam in her eye. Haley in that ring means business.
“Never forget she can kick your ass.” Jax saddles up beside me. “And if she doesn’t, I will.”
I ignore him as John combines both mitts and lifts them in the air. Haley nails a double high kick with a power that could kill a man. My eyes widen as the crowd shouts for more. John slams his mitts together and continues to dance around Haley. “That’s right, Hays. That’s right!”
John turns and shouts for Kaden. The guys clap as John whispers instructions into Kaden’s ear.
“What’s the big deal?” I ask.
Jax surveys me, head to toe, then back up. “You really don’t know, do you?”
I scratch my jaw, pride preventing me from giving an answer.
He grins at my nonresponse. “Haley’s a national titleholder.”
Shit. I never asked and she never told. I shift and Jax chuckles.
“Beyond that? This is the first time Haley’s honest to God trained here in over a year and in a few seconds this will be the first time she’s sparred in over six months.”
My head snaps to Jax, the shock registering an earthquake in my system. “She trains here all the time.”
“When she left Black Fire, she left fighting. She agreed to come back to the gym, but she refuses to engage. What you’re witnessing is her resurrection.”
“Last time I checked, you and I aren’t friends. So why the feel-good moment?”
“She’s more than you and better than you and I’m fine with you seeing it. Haley’s already been through hell and neither Kaden nor I will permit a return visit. Got it, amigo?”
I turn my attention to the ring, trying to sort through Jax’s words. Haley left fighting when she left Matt. I run a hand through my hair to shake out the mental cobwebs. She didn’t stop just dating fighters; she stopped fighting. The image of her nursing her hand the night we met, the fight we had in my car and how angry she was that she hit someone and was hit in return—it all flashes in my mind.
In the middle of the ring, Kaden nods his chin and lifts his arm, glove out. Haley’s hesitant on her side of the ring as she leans against the post. The crowd yells at Haley to accept and I step forward. Jax throws out his arm like a railway gate. “She made a deal with John over this. Don’t embarrass her.”
“What deal?”
“Like you don’t know, and if you don’t, figure it out.”
I roll on the balls of my feet, gravity begging to rush the ring. “He’s bigger than her.”
“And Haley can drop his ass. This isn’t a real fight and she knows it. A few hit series. That’s it. If she’s going to be worth a damn again, inside or outside of that ring, Haley’s got to engage.”
I straighten and go toe-to-toe with Jax. “She doesn’t have to.”
His green eyes harden as he invades my space. “She does if she wants to save your ass like she says she does. Haven’t you wondered why you aren’t training with the rest of us?”
Fuck this. I round away from Jax and fight through the crowd right as Haley pushes off the post. Before I can reach the ropes, Haley taps her glove against Kaden’s and the two immediately slam their guards against their heads and begin to circle.
She’s smaller than him, possibly a hundred pounds lighter, and every instinct screams to slide in front of her. If he wasn’t her brother, I’d be in between them in a heartbeat. Kaden turns his guard, hiding his face and exposing his wrists. Haley answers with a jab, cross into his gloves. With their guards still in check, they move again and Haley turns her wrists to Kaden and he throws the same jab, cross.
Haley slips back and lowers her guard. Color drains from her face. “I can’t.”
“Come on, Hays. Don’t give in. Just a few hits.” Kaden turns his wrists out to Haley again.
She sucks in a breath and my pulse pounds in my ears. There’s fear in her eyes. With the release of air, she rejoins the dance. They continue to hit each other’s wrists, the punches increase in frequency, adding low kicks to the thighs, all of it methodical.
My grip on the rope tightens as the round continues and each strike grows in intensity. Kaden throws a jab and Haley fumbles with her guard right as Kaden goes for the hook. His glove connects against her headgear behind her ear. Her head snaps to the left with the blow.
Kaden’s hands drop and he reaches for Haley. “I’m sorry—”
The answering cross comes hard and fast, too fast for Kaden to raise his guard, and she lands the punch on his jaw. He reacts by tossing out an arm to block the jab, but Haley throws another cross, following up with a cut kick behind the knees. Kaden’s body pounds to the floor and the gym vibrates.
A flash of blond breezes past me and, following Jax’s lead, I’m under the ropes. Haley is already turned away, tearing her gloves off with her teeth, her breath coming out hard and fast. John’s in front of her, mumbling shit, and she screams at him, “Get away!”
Chapter 55
Haley
John’s fingers wrap around my biceps and I freak. Completely. I jerk out of his grasp and throw back my arm, prepared to punch if he touches me again.
He tosses his hands in the air. “Easy, Haley.”
“I said get away!” The words tear through my throat with such force that the chords of my voice box strain. “I can’t do this! I told you I can’t do this!”
The world blurs from colors to shades of gray, then back to colors again.
John nods but doesn’t do what I ask. He’s too near. Everyone is too near. It’s like the gym is shrinking. I rip at the Velcro of the hand wrap and I need the material off now, but it won’t come off. It’s attached to me. Just like Matt’s blood is still attached to me.
I’m stained and ruined. I hit my brother in anger and sent him to the floor. An ache develops in my chest, near my heart, and breathing becomes difficult. Why can’t I get these wraps off? “Get them off!”
But when John nears me, I step back and shake my head to the point he trembles in my vision. I need the material off, I need to get away and not fight ever again. I’m evil when I fight and if John touches me, I’ll hurt him, too.
“Let me do it.”
I suck in a breath when West dips under the ropes. Oh, my God, he’s seeing this. He’s seeing me. The real me. The poseur. The fraud. The patheticness. “I don’t want to hurt you.”
West moves toward me with the slow, confident swagger that only he possesses. “Only way you could do that is to tell me to stay away. You know kick-ass girls turn me on.”
As if there was a breeze, the haze clears just enough to create a small focused thought. “I want my wraps off.” I lift my palm to reveal how I’ve murdered the set on my left hand.
Like a thief, West slips into my personal space. “I can see that. Do you mind if I give it a crack? I’m quite talented when it comes to taking clothes off of pretty girls.”