TORTURE ME_ The Bandits MC(129)

“This sounds pretty serious,” he said as he turned and wrapped his arms around my shoulders. He brushed my hair aside and kissed my neck.



I wanted to give in again. I wanted to let him take me right there on the bed, a second time today, but I couldn’t. I pushed him back gently and stood up. “This is serious, Gage,” I told him, turning to face him.



“Okay.” He looked confused, and I knew he had no idea what Dimitri could have told me.



“I have something serious to ask you,” I said, bracing myself for what I was about to say. Saying it would make it real, and regardless of his response, the doubt would be there.



“You have been talking to Dimitri, haven’t you?” The uncertainty and confusion in his face began turning to concern bordering on anger.



“Yes, Dimitri and I have talked about some things.” I tried to keep my voice level and even, though I was felt like I was going to fall apart before I could force myself to say anything to him.



He grabbed his clothes and started getting dressed.



“Well, what did Dimitri have to say today?” Gage sat back down after pulling on his jeans. His massive chest disappeared behind his white t-shirt.



I took a deep breath. It was now or never. I knew that once I opened my mouth, there would be no turning back. Whatever was happening between us would probably end, and Dimitri had probably just bought himself another beat down with what he told me.



“Tell me about your last girlfriend.”



I could have slapped him from the look on his face. He sat back, slack-jawed, completely blindsided by my question. He rubbed the stubble forming along his jawline as the initial shock faded.



“Why do you want to know about her?” he asked cautiously, obviously trying to get me to tell him what I already knew.



“Dimitri told me you killed her so you could get out of a deal that went south.” My voice sounded so feeble, even to myself.



Gage didn’t say anything right away. I could see him digesting what Dimitri had told me. The longer he thought about it, though, the angrier he looked.



“What does he know about it?” he growled. “He wasn’t there.”



“He told me as much,” I assured him. His growing anger radiated from his body like heat. I instinctively took a step back and drew his attention back to me with my movement.



“I think your visits with our Russian friend have come to an end.” He narrowed his eyes at me. A chill went up my spine. I felt I was in danger. The last thing I wanted to do was to draw his anger towards me.



“I think if I keep talking to him, he’ll crack,” I protested meekly.



Gage stood up, and I had to tell myself not to cower back further. His seething anger was the calm kind that gave no indication of what his next move would be. I didn’t want to be too close when he finally lashed out. I also wanted him to know I could stand my ground, even in the face of someone like him, who towered over me and shrouded me in the shadow he cast.



“No. I’m not going to let you keep talking to him just so that he can keep filling your head with this idea that I’m a dangerous man.” The anger was rising to the surface. His voice was curling at the edges as the flames licked it.



“You still haven’t denied it.” The words were out before I even had a chance to filter the thought. That was one of those things I wished I could have unsaid.



“What would you have done?” There it was. There was his anger. It erupted in his booming voice that reverberated throughout the room and shook me down to the bone.



“I wasn’t there, Gage. I wouldn’t have been there. This is not the life I want to lead. I don’t want to be part of this shit. Torturing people, killing people, selling drugs and God only knows what else? I don’t want that for myself.” His anger ignited my voice finally. I didn’t want to hide anymore. I wanted to get in his face. I wanted to scream. I wanted to leave.



“Then you just don’t understand. Maybe you should go. Maybe I should find someone else who won’t get so involved, who won’t try to understand so much about what’s going on. You obviously can’t just do the job.” His voice had calmed, but his words were still full of venom.



“I think we both know that leaving won’t solve anything. How do I know I can leave without having to check over my shoulder? How do I know I won’t eventually end up in Dimitri’s chair?” I hurled the questions at him.



“How do you know you won’t end up down there with him if you keep this shit up?” he growled.



We stood chest to chest with our faces mere inches apart as we talked. I kept waiting for him to kiss me. I longed for something to happen to turn this confrontation around. The tension between us threatened to explode if we continued not to give into it. He should have known I wasn’t about to leave. I couldn’t leave.