Swept Away by the Tycoon(28)

He’d made the drive in record time. Motor across a state three or four times in as many days and you got used to the route. He’d done this trip in one straight shot, no stops.

Although he did slow down when he passed the exit for the Bluebird.

Ian rubbed the center of his chest. Damn heartburn had bothered him since leavng the city. Simultaneously sharp and throbbing, the pain felt as if something had smashed a giant hole in his sternum.

Make that someone. The hole had formed the second Chloe closed the door in his face.

If only she knew how badly he’d wanted to bang on that door, drag her back into the hallway and kiss her senseless. Thankfully, he’d kept his impulse reined in.

He’d done the right thing, walking away. Sure, she hurt now. That so-called casual attitude didn’t fool him for a bit—even before the meltdown. In time, however—in the long run—she would be better off. She’d find a great guy, fall in love, and make his mornings better by being there when he opened his eyes.

Ian rubbed his sternum again.

We get what we deserve. Her parting words, and his wish for her. If that meant he had to deal with heartburn for the rest of his life, then so be it.

The door opened, stopping him in his tracks. “I got a message to come see you— Crap, you don’t give up, do you?”

“Not when it matters,” Ian replied. Crossing the room in two strides, he reached over the teenager’s head to shut the door. “I’m not letting you walk away this time.”

“Seriously? You’re not letting me walk away.”

Ian winced. The kid wasn’t making things easy, but Ian held his ground. Today’s visit wasn’t about him. He was here to set Matt free, and for Chloe. So she’d know he cared enough to fight. “Five minutes. And when I’m done, you never have to speak with me again.”

Matt stared at the oak door. The kid was wavering. Otherwise, he would have walked out by now. “How much did it cost you to get Dean Zobreist to do your dirty work?” he asked.

“You don’t want to know.”

“I hope you get your money’s worth.”

“I already have. You’re still here.”

“Okay.” He turned around and folded his arms across his chest. “Five minutes,” he repeated, chin jutting forward. “Four minutes and thirty seconds actually.”

Talk about a chip off the old block. Ian took a deep breath. “I was wrong to surprise you the other day. I—I wanted us to reconnect so badly, I didn’t stop to think about how you might feel.”

“So you decided to surprise me again to apologize.”

There was a certain irony to the arrangement, wasn’t there? “Not to apologize. To give you this.” Reaching into his breast pocket, he pulled out a letter. His final letter of amends. “This explains everything that happened over the last thirteen years. When you’re ready, I hope you’ll read it. After, if you want to talk, you call me. I’ll meet you whenever and wherever. You call the shots.”

Matt stared at the envelope. “That’s it?”

“Unless you want to talk now.”

“I’m not—”

“Ready. I know.” Ian stepped away from the door. Matt immediately reached for the handle. “I love you very much, Matt. I always have.”

“You have a funny way of showing it,” his son replied.

“Love isn’t always visible. Someday I hope you’ll realize that my being around would have only made things worse for you.”

The teenager started through the door, only to stop and turn around. “I believe you, you know,” he said, the words going straight to Ian’s heart. “But it would have been nice if I’d had a choice.”

He was getting one now. For the third time in three days, Ian let someone he cared about walk away, and it ripped his insides in two.



He waited until he was back in his car before calling Jack.

“How’d it go?” the lawyer asked.

“About as well as could be expected. At least he didn’t throw the envelope in my face.”

“Good news there. Who knows? Maybe the kid’ll come around someday.”

“Maybe,” Ian replied. Although he didn’t think he’d hold his breath, waiting for the moment. There were many layers of resentment and disappointment to be worked through even if Matt did read his apology. Could scars like that ever truly be healed?

Ian thought of Chloe, who was still hoping for an explanation from her own father, and wondered. Wondered if the man ever sat in his car kicking himself for ignoring such a beautiful, unique, amazing woman. If so, Ian hoped the guy felt as guilt-ridden as he did.

He let his head fall back against the headrest. “Do you think I was right to keep my distance all those years?”

“Between the alcohol and the Jeanine factor, you can certainly put forth a good argument. Why?”

“Just wondering. Matt said something on the way out the door. Made me wonder how bad the damage would have been had I stayed in touch.”

“I’m going to guess there would be damage caused either way. You were a bastard until you got sober, or did you forget?”

“How could I when I’ve got you to remind me?”

“True.” There was a brief silence on the other end. Ian could picture the lawyer grinning. “What exactly did he say, anyway?”

“He accused me of not giving him a choice.”

“Of course you didn’t. He was five years old and you were...”

“A drunk, I know.” Chances were, if he’d stayed, he would have inflicted the same damage on Matt that his father had inflicted on him.

“Either way,” Jack continued, “there’s little you can do about your decision now. What’s done is done. Best you can do, if you did make a mistake, is try to fix things, and hope you don’t make the same mistake again.”

The thing was, had he learned? All the way back to the city, Ian couldn’t shake the notion that he’d forgotten a piece of the lesson.

Matt’s comment kept ringing in his head: I didn’t have a choice. Jack was right, of course. The kid had been five years old at the time. Ian walked away to protect an innocent boy. He couldn’t offer Matt a choice. Maybe, if he’d been an adult...

You mean like Chloe?

Crap. Ian practically slammed on the brakes, the thought reared up on him so abruptly. What did Chloe have to do with all this?

A stupid question. She and Matt had been twisted together for days now. Think of Matt’s abandonment and Chloe’s story wasn’t far behind. Picture Matt’s angry face and Chloe’s disappointed expression followed. Hell, think of anything and thoughts of Chloe tagged along. In a few short days, she’d managed to permanently attach herself to his brain. More than his brain, he amended, rubbing at the hole in his chest.

The more he thought about it, given their shared childhood experiences, the commonalities between Matt and Chloe didn’t surprise him. Ian wondered if his son faced the world with the same edge and bravado. The first day she’d strutted her way into his coffee shop...man, but she’d looked so sassy. He realized now she wore her attitude like a shield. All her talk about not being the relationship type? Her way of getting out in front of any hurt the world might deal her.

It’s what she’d been doing yesterday morning, too. He could tell because her eyes had the desperate sheen to them that came from trying too hard.

But when she dropped her defenses... Then those eyes grew so soft and vulnerable, a man could drown in them. Ian could see her now. Eyes brimming with emotion in the firelight. She’d given him a gift, he realized. A window into a part of her she didn’t share with too many people. That glimpse stole his heart.

Who was he kidding? She’d stolen his heart the moment she gave Aiden a peppermint latte shower. All Saturday night did was cement her hold on Ian.

But he’d pushed her way. Just like with Matt, he’d pulled back because he’d decided distance was for the best. He took away her choice.

“Idiot.” Ian added a few other choice adjectives as well while pounding the steering wheel. All his talk about no longer being selfish, and here he was, being as selfish as ever.

How many losses would he have to endure before the lesson kicked in? His son, his company, years of sobriety—all lost because of his stubbornness. His insistence on doing things his way. And now here he was, insisting he knew best again. He’d already lost Matthew. Did Ian want to be sitting in his car twenty years from now, mourning Chloe, too? Because Lord knows, he wouldn’t find another woman like her again. She was one of a kind.

The car behind blared its horn, then passed him on the right, the driver offering up an obscene gesture on the way by. Ian started to glare in return until he glanced at the speedometer and saw he’d slowed down to thirty miles an hour. He needed to get his mind off Chloe before he caused an accident.

Would if it were that easy, he said to himself as he pulled over a lane. The upcoming exit sign caught his eye and he gasped. Looked like the universe was full of messages today, wasn’t it? Flipping on his direction signal, he eased right again and prepared to turn off the highway. Same exit he and Chloe had taken leaving the Bluebird. With luck Josef and Dagmar would have a room he could use for a few days. He had a lot of thinking to do.