He offered a wry smile. “I don’t believe I ever claimed to be a simple club manager.”
“No, I don’t suppose you did,” she admitted. “The Bentley might have been a bit overdone though.”
He chuckled and took another sip of his wine. “Okay, I admit, I was trying to impress you. Did it work?”
She shrugged. “I think I’m more confused than impressed, but then I seem to be wallowing in confusion lately.”
The amused twinkle in his eye faded and was replaced by genuine concern. He reached across the table and laid his hand on top of hers. “If there’s something I can do to help, Faith, I will.”
She slowly pulled her hand away and put it in her lap. “I admit, there were things I wanted to discuss with you, a subject I thought you might have considerable expertise in, but now…”
“Now, what?” he prompted.
She twisted in her seat. “Now, I wonder how much of your role as ‘manager’ of The House is just a game, like everything else. I’m having a hard time figuring out what’s real and what isn’t.”
“Ah.”
“What does that mean?” she asked, frustrated by the seemingly knowing look on his face.
He sat back and took a deep breath. “Faith, I own The House. So my position as manager or proprietor is certainly legitimate. The House is my escape. It’s a place I can go where I’m free to be myself or to enjoy a different lifestyle.”
“So it’s a hobby?” she asked.
He gave her a searching look. “I can sense your anger and frustration. Right now you feel led on, lied to and played with.”
Her brows went up. Yep, he’d nailed that one on the head. Actually, she felt more like she’d become trapped in some never-ending fantasy land where everyone was reading one of those scripts Gray had bitched about.
“I admire you, Faith. I really do.”
“Huh?”
“You know what you want, and you aren’t willing to settle for less, and you’re willing to make mistakes while you search.”
She laughed. She couldn’t help it. Know what she wanted? She wished. It would make things so much easier.
He shook his head when she would have spoken. “You may be confused right now, but you know deep down inside what you want. You just haven’t known how to get it. That’s why you came to The House. Not because you didn’t know what you wanted, but you just didn’t know where to find it.”
“Or how to go about it,” she said glumly.
“Who was the guy?” Damon asked curiously. “The one who showed up at The House looking like he wanted to tear Brent limb from limb.”
Faith looked down and grimaced. “His name is Gray.”
“He seemed to know quite a lot about you,” he said simply.
She sighed. “I think he understands me too well.”
“Meaning?”
“It’s a long story. A long, really messed-up story.”
“I’ve got all night,” he said lazily.
She hesitated for a moment, and then she poured out the entire story, starting with her breakup with John and her subsequent encounter with Gray, first at The House and then at his apartment.
“And the sad thing is, he’s right,” she said when she’d finished.
Damon gave her a thoughtful look as he refilled his wineglass.
“I’d hoped maybe you could offer some insight. Am I playing games? The very thing I despised so much about my experience at The House? Am I wanting something that just doesn’t exist outside role playing and elaborate fantasy reenactments?”
He leaned over and touched her cheek. “I don’t think that at all. I think, as I said before, that you’re a woman who very much knows what she wants. You just haven’t known how to go about it, nor have you met the right man, a man who won’t have to take direction, hints or scripts.”
“Am I twisted?”
“No. You’re a woman most men would dream of having. Myself included. I spend a lot of time at The House, and part of it’s because I too am searching. For what, I’m not even sure, but I know it goes beyond the harmless games played behind closed doors. I don’t begrudge any of my patrons their sexual excesses. I’m very committed to giving them a safe environment in which to play out their wildest fantasies.”
“What do you want?” she asked softly.
He smiled and shook his head. “It would shock you.”
She raised a brow. “If having you watch while I sucked off another man didn’t shock me, I don’t see why anything you have to say should.”
He choked on his wine and pulled a napkin up to cover his mouth. It took her a minute to figure out he was laughing.