I nodded, my heart - what was left of it - in my throat, my breaths coming in short, frantic huffs.
He led the way out of the bedroom and towards the front door. His large, hot, safe palm wrapped around my hand. The contact reassuring, when nothing should have been able to remove the doubt and fear. I was still panicked. Still one second away from full-on meltdown. But I trusted Ryan. I trusted him to get my daughter back, and while he did it, I wouldn't breakdown.
There'd be time enough later. I sucked in a deep breath, squared my shoulders and lifted my chin. Hang in there, Daisy-girl. Mummy and Daddy are coming.
He cracked the front door, his hand on his gun - still holstered at his hip - as he peered outside. The suburban street was eerily silent, yellow-orange street lamps provided a surreal illumination, making everything glow in an otherworldly light. Ryan glanced over his shoulder, made eye contact, held me up with that simple, but intense look.
His eyes said all there needed to be said. We'll get her back.
Mine said, I know, I trust you.
He blinked, nodded his head, and then turned back and pushed through the door.
Nothing came at us. Not a sound rang out on the still night air. The street stood in stasis like my heart; like my body it was encased in ice. But this was not my icy shield of confidence. This was black ice, dark and dreadful. Filled with fear.
I hated it. I despised feeling this level of angst again. But I gripped it tightly, all the same, and used it to keep me going. To keep me standing. To keep me putting one foot in front of the other in front of the other. I had no shield of my own to call on. I leaned on Ryan, while I used that bleak, black ice to prop me up.
Knowing it could shatter into a million pieces at any second.
We rounded the side of the house to Daisy's window. Footprints embedded in the soil beneath the windowsill. Big, masculine boots. I couldn't hazard a shoe size, but I was betting they were ex-detective Simon Andrews' boots. Ryan crouched down and picked up some dirt between his fingers, rubbing it back and forth. Then turned and cocked his head at an angle, glancing across the dew covered front lawn.
"There," he said, raising his dirt stained hand and pointing with a finger.
I leaned down to his level, getting a clear line of sight at what he was indicating. More boot prints across the lawn, heading towards Gulf Harbour Drive.
"He might have a car on the main road," Ryan suggested, pulling out his keys from his front jeans pocket and handing them to me. "You drive, while I follow his trail on foot."
He wouldn't leave my side for second, coming with me to open the garage door and helping me into the car. Then he led the way back down the driveway, and onto the road. I followed at a snail's pace behind him, as he ran for a bit, then walked, then crouched down again, reaching out to touch the ground.
It was taking too long. I wanted to push the accelerator down and go full speed along the street. But where to? If Andrews had a car, where had he taken my baby to? And if he didn't, what was he doing to her now? Was she scared? Of course she was. Was she hurt?
Oh dear God, please. I closed my eyes and hung my head down on the steering wheel, the engine reverberated through the car, slamming into my jumbled head.
The passenger door opened, and Ryan slipped in, scaring the ever loving crap out of me. I squealed. The door slammed shut. His hand landed on my knee with a soft thud.
"Breathe," he instructed, but didn't wait for my gasped breath of air. "He's taken her to the beach on foot."
"Where's his car?"
"Either there, or back up on Gulf Harbour Drive. But..." He hesitated, intent brown eyes staring right into my own. "Marie, he doesn't want Daisy. He wants the ledger." Ryan reached around the back of his shirt and pulled the blasted fucking book from the waistband of his jeans.
I stared at the horrid thing. My stomach roiling, my heart clenching, my life - and Daisy's- flashing before my eyes. Without this ledger I had no deal with the Crown Prosecutor. My ticket to freedom would be gone.
I lifted my eyes from the worn leather cover and stared directly into Ryan's understanding ones. There was no question. No need to think twice.
"Let's go give it to him."
Ryan nodded and indicated what way to go on the road, that would lead us to the beach at Okoromai Bay.
I don't know how long Andrews had had Daisy, and he was clearly still on foot, taking the shortcuts through the reserves to get to Shakespear Regional Park, where Okoromai Bay was found. In contrast, we had to travel by car on the roads, making our route longer, despite the SUV taking the corners at high speed. But I was guessing he would still reach the beach before us, given his head start and lack of four wheels. I prayed Daisy was holding it together.