We got up and took the plates to the kitchen. I rinsed, Jonas loaded the dishwasher. I did this while looking out the window to the deck about seven hundred times. I couldn’t see Tate and I also couldn’t hear him.
“She does this,” Jonas stated and my eyes went from the window to him.
“Sorry, honey?”
“Mom, she calls Dad when I’m here. Rags on him.”
Oh.
My.
God.
He knew that? How?
The only way was for her to tell him (because I knew Tate wouldn’t) or for him to figure it out (which I knew Jonas could, he was a smart kid and kids noticed a lot more than adults gave them credit for, or at least that was what I heard).
“Um…” I mumbled.
“It’s okay, he’s used to it.”
It was not okay. Of course, this was not my place to say so I kept my mouth shut.
“I’ll tell the judge I wanna live here,” Jonas announced unexpectedly and my eyes shot to him.
“Sorry?”
“Can you tell Dad that?” he asked.
I took in a breath and wondered what to do in this situation. Then I decided most parents probably wondered what to do in a variety of situations that occurred daily and they went with their gut. So I decided to go with my gut, grabbed a kitchen towel, wiped my hands, tossed the towel on the counter, leaned down and shoved the drawer into the dishwasher then closed the door. Then I curled my fingers around his shoulder and moved us both so we were leaning sideways against the counter.
“Do you know –?” I started.
“About the papers?” he asked and I nodded. “Yeah, she talks about it all the time. She’s pretty pi… I mean, upset.”
I bit my lip.
Then I went with my gut again and cupped the underside of his jaw with my hand, tipping his head up to me and leaning slightly down to get close to him.
“Yes, baby, I’ll tell him,” I spoke gently. “What I’d like to know is, why won’t you?”
Jonas stared up at me, his eyes wide, his lips parted and something about his astonished look set me on edge. He acted old for his age, held intelligent conversations (when he wasn’t talking about milfs that was). He was young but he wasn’t stupid or childlike.
He looked like a child right then, vulnerable with a hint of innocent wonder.
Then I figured out what set me on edge.
I guessed that Neeta didn’t talk gently to her son and she didn’t touch him gently either. He’d never felt it, at least not from a woman or, at least, not on any kind of normal basis. The other night, when she referred to him, she called him her “kid”. I’d thought nothing of it at the time but now it seemed detached. She didn’t call him “my son” or “my boy”. Just “my kid”.
This beautiful child was just her kid.
My heart turned over again as my stomach clenched and I had to take a cautious breath so he wouldn’t hear it and I could still control the tears that threatened.
He recovered and whispered, “She finds out, she’ll freak.”
“Finds out you want to live with your Dad?”
He nodded.
Of its own accord, though I didn’t do a thing to stop it, my hand slid from his jaw, across his soft cheek, over his thick hair and then down to curve around the side of his neck.
“And she’ll freak if she knows you’re willing to talk to the judge?”
“That and that I told Dad. But if she finds out and I say I didn’t say it to him, she’ll believe me.”
“She will?”
“I don’t lie to her.”
I thought this was likely because she lit into him if he did.
Still, I asked, “You don’t?”
“No. She’s not… she’s… Blake… she’s used to getting lied to. She knows when someone’s lyin’. She told me that Dad and me, Grandpop, Uncle Wood, we were the only ones never lied to her. She always believes me. I just gotta let Dad know and I gotta do it so I don’t hafta lie to her.”
I studied him.
Then I nodded. “Okay, honey, I’ll tell your Dad.”
He looked visibly relieved and I instantly wished I’d gotten into a catfight with his mother so I had a chance to get my licks in.
“Thanks, Lauren,” he said quietly.
“Laurie,” I corrected.
“Laurie?”
“What your Dad and my friends call me.”
He smiled a small smile. “Okay. Laurie.”
“All right, baby,” I whispered. “And Jonas?”
“Yeah?”
“Before you leave, I’ll give you my number. You have anything you need, anytime, call me. And if you have anything you need to keep from your Mom but you need your Dad to know and you feel you can’t tell him, you let me know and I’ll tell him for you. We got a deal?”