Sweet Carolina(49)

“The way I see it, you started out with the odds stacked against you. You took on debt that wasn't yours, you took on me, a liability by anyone's standards, and you're taking on the entire racing establishment all at one time. I can't do anything about the racing establishment, and I won't do anything about me. I won't quit, Caro. You can fire me, but we both know you won't find another Cup driver, at least not one who's willing to work for a percentage of winnings only.” She opened her mouth to protest, but Dell held up his hand. “No, hear me out. I can amend my contract to reflect the new compensation arrangement, and I will. I can also pay off the debt you assumed when you took over Hawkins Racing.”

He held up his hand to stop her one more time. “I believe in you, Caro. The engine you're working on is good, real good. We're parked for the next two weeks. Nothing we can do about that. Let me loan you the money to pay off the debt – at a low interest rate, say, zero percent, with no payment due until the end of the season. In the meantime, we use the next two weeks to work on the engine and build a new car or two, and when we're back on the track, I'll do everything I can to win.”

Caro stared at him as if he'd lost his last marble, and perhaps he had. No matter what, he wouldn't let Caro lose her dream. Hell, he'd lost all of his long ago, and he didn't wish the same kind of pain on anyone.

“I'm giving you a chance to show the ol' boys' club what you can do, Caro. Show them the new Hawkins engine, and make them eat their words.”

“But if you don't win, you'll go down with Hawkins Racing,” she said.

“I'll win, Caro. I promise.”

“Not if you drive like you've been driving. You're a menace on the track, Dell. What happened to the driver they used to say was going to change racing? He's the driver I wanted when I hired you. I was stupid and naïve. I thought that promising driver was in there somewhere, that all I had to do was give him a new ride and he'd be grateful enough to come out of hiding. Where is that driver, Dell?”

“He's here.” Dell thumped his chest with his fist. “He's right here.” The heat of his conviction warmed the spot where his fist made contact with his chest, and spread through his body. The driver she spoke of still existed, and Dell was going to find him again. For Carolina. She was right, that driver was good, but Dell buried him along with Caudell in a futile effort to be the driver his father wanted him to be. Well, fuck that. Caudell only needed one son to follow in his footsteps, and as far as Dell was concerned, that honor belonged to Warner. Dell would never be the son Caudell wanted him to be, but he could be the man Caro needed, and perhaps, if he were really lucky, wanted too.

“Give me a chance to prove it, Caro. For the last three years, I've been trying to prove something to a dead man, but I've got something more important to prove. I want to prove I can be the man you need.”

Caro grabbed a tissue from the box on the corner of her desk and dabbed at the corners of her eyes. Shit. He'd made her cry again.

“Don't cry, Caro.” The words, I love you, nearly tumbled off the tip of his tongue, but he couldn't say them. He couldn't put that kind of shit in her lap too. “I've got the money. Truckloads of it. I believe in you. Take the money. Show the racing world who Caro Hawkins is, and I'll show you the driver you thought you hired. I promise.”

A trickle of sweat slid down his spine as he sat with clenched fists awaiting Caro's decision. He was afraid to breathe, afraid any movement might call attention to his anxiety.

She rocked back in her chair and studied him with narrowed eyes. He didn't know what he would do if she said no. Probably beg. It wasn't out of the question.

At long last, Caro stood and walked to the bank of windows overlooking the garage. Dell followed her with his eyes as she crossed the room and flicked a switch beside the window. Light flooded the empty room. Dell unglued his ass from the chair and went to stand behind her. He wrapped his arms around her waist and tugged gently. She leaned into him, but remained stiff as if the tension in her body was the only thing holding her together. Her scent wafted over and through him, filling him with an emotion so foreign, it stole his breath.

He wanted to be the man she needed more than he wanted his next breath.

“I grew up in this garage,” she said. Her hands closed over his. “I'm not ready to give it up, Dell.”

“You don't have to. Let me help you.”

“I don't know. It might just postpone the inevitable.”

“The only thing you know for certain is if you sell to Renfro, Hawkins Racing will be done. He'll dismantle the shop, take what he wants for himself and leave the rest. That's a given. As long as you keep the doors open, there's a chance, Caro.” He kissed the top of her head, then rested his chin there as they stared out at the empty shop. “Take the chance, Carolina. Even if you fail, you'll know you tried everything possible. No regrets.”