I listen to Graham's tirade, slipping on my pants and shrugging on my shirt. It's hard to pay attention to what my brother is saying as Ellie sits up in bed, her breasts perky, her nipples in stiff peaks.
She climbs out of bed, her ass so perfectly round I want to palm it. I'm only reminded of the call when I hear Graham mutter a string of profanities.
"Relax, Graham. I heard everything you said."
"You did fucking not."
"Okay. You're right. I didn't. But I get the gist of it."
He sighs. "Moments like this, I loathe being the only responsible one out of all of you."
"I'll make it up to you."
"I'll add it to your tab," he says. "Oh, before I go-Barrett will be in town in a couple of days. Mom wants everyone at the Farm for dinner. She said something about Linc wanting to get together anyway so it's perfect timing. I'll text you when."
"I'll be there. Talk to you later."
Placing my phone back in my pocket, I stretch my arms over my head and catch Ellie watching me.
"What?" I ask.
"I love listening to you talk to your brothers."
"Why is that?"
She shrugs. "You feel so . . . safe with them, I guess. Like it seems like you can say whatever you want and you know if you called him back right now, no matter how mad he is at you, he'd help you."
"True," I state. "He would. Any of them would. Well, maybe not Lincoln right now, but he has an excuse."
She disappears in a closet and returns in a purple and white robe. I hate her body being covered and away from my sight. It feels like a barrier, a way to keep me out.
"Want to meet up for lunch?" I offer, feeling her out.
"I have a meeting, actually."
"Dinner? Or we could go fishing."
"I haven't been fishing in forever," she admits. "Probably not since I left for school."
"Let's do it then."
"Maybe some other time."
"I'm sorry. Did I miss something here?"
She crosses her arms over her chest. "What do you mean?"
I mimic her posture. "I thought we were passed this whole thing."
"I can have dinner and an orgasm and not lose my mind, Ford."
"Seeing me again is losing your mind?" I ask in disbelief. "You're going to have to explain that one, El."
There's no attempt to explain, no words thrown my way to demonstrate why she's now pushing back a little. She just stands there and watches me in that adorable little robe I want to rip off her damn body.
"Fine," I sigh, stuffing my wallet in my pocket.
"Fine what?"
"I'll just keep thinking of ways to win you over."
Her arms drop to her sides. "Stop trying. Just let things be."
"And risk losing you? Risk letting you think I don't care? Sorry, babe. Not happening."
"Listen, I love being with you . . ."
"And I love being with you. So what's the issue?"
"The issue is just because we had sex doesn't mean things have somehow changed between us."
"Babe. Everything has changed."
The air changes, everything now heavier than it was moments ago. Her eyes are filled with an uncertainty that I want to kiss away.
"I'm not going to lie and pretend I don't feel something different with you than I've felt with anyone else."
"Good to fucking know."
She shakes her head. "That's part of the problem, Ford. I don't know how much of this is just some kind of hold-over emotion from a carefree time in our lives and how much of it is real."
"You don't think this is real?"
"I don't know," she breathes. "I hope it is. But before I go jumping in this with you-whatever that even means-I need to know this isn't something we're doing on a whim."
"Even if it is, and it's not, what would be wrong with that, El? We're two adults that want to spend time together."
"Spending time together is fine. I quite enjoy spending time with you," she adds cheekily. "But none of that changes where I want us to go. Not right now."
"Ellie, I want to-"
"Your knight awaits!" A voice, a very male voice, booms from the entryway.
My gaze snaps from Ellie to the doorway, back to a wide-eyed Ellie. "Who in the hell is that?" I ask.
"Where are you?" he shouts again, his voice much closer. "Ellie?" The last syllable wraps around the doorway as he steps into view. He takes me in and stops dead in his tracks. "And who are you?"
"I was going to ask you the same thing," I warn.