Surviving Broken(10)

JC stopped. She kicked the dirt path unloading a big exhale full of angst. “I think there is something seriously wrong with me.”

Tracy’s brilliant blue eyes widened with concern. She entwined her fingers through JC’s for admission support. “What is it? What’s wrong?”

JC lifted her shoulders, giving a small shrug as she pulled in a deep breath. “I can’t have orgasms during sex. Ever! Hardly ever. Not just with Luca either.”

Tracy’s mouth dropped open. Speechless, she stared at her sister in disbelief. She finally managed to say, “Come again?”

JC threw her hands in the air. “I wish I fucking could! I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”

Shaking her head back into reality, Tracy asked, “You’ve never been able to have an orgasm with a man?”

JC rolled her eyes, pacing back-and-forth in the dirt. “Yes, I have. With a little help.” She held up her hand and wiggled her fingers. “I mean…you know, I’m great on my own. But with Luca, or any other man, orgasms are like birthdays and holidays. They only come around once a year!”

Tracy giggled at JC’s unintended innuendo, “Come once a year?”

JC didn’t laugh. Heat rose to her cheeks and her brows furrowed as she blinked back her pent up frustrations. “What’s wrong with me, Tracy?”

“Awe, come here.” Tracy pulled JC into her arms and swayed back and forth while stroking her long hair. “Maybe it just takes time for a guy to figure out the right buttons to push.”

“It’s been six months! I think it’s me. Do you think it’s me? I’m totally mind-fucking myself now, trying to diagnose every move I make. I even tried to do the hands off approach.”

Tracy frowned in confusion.

“Oh for God’s sake! I didn’t fiddle my bean, rub one out, masturbate for over a week! Still nothing!”

“Maybe you should talk to Mom.” Tracy suggested with a nod, as if it was the brainstorm of the year.

JC wrinkled her nose repulsively. “Seriously? You want me to ask Mom! Oh yeah, that’s what I’m gonna do. I’ll call her right now.

Hi Momma. I can’t get off.

Hi JC. Did you say, you have a cough?

No Mom. I said, I can’t come.

Did you say, you started playing the drum?

I said, I can’t climax.

Did you say, you found dinosaur tracks?

“Are you out of your mind, Tracy? Her and Tom walk by each other and flames ignite! Sparks fly! Planets align! They probably have sex more than all of us kids put together.” JC mindlessly played with a cluster of grapes hanging from the vines.

“Exactly. I bet she’d have great advice.” Tracy stated. “Maybe you should talk to Luca.”

“I don’t know. Some men are weird about that kind of stuff. I’d rather talk to Mom then Luca.”

“If you live with him, don’t you think you should be able to talk to him?”

“We don’t live together either. I’m just staying there.”

“Same difference.” Tracy pointed out as they headed back toward the house.

“Not to me.” JC assured.

Taking her sisters advice, she delicately approached the situation one night with Luca. It did not go well. JC didn’t even get opportunity to fully explain. Her hopes of a, Hey baby, let me help you with that, were shattered thirty seconds into the conversation. Luca wasn’t the least bit understanding, declaring that it certainly wasn’t his fault she wasn’t a good lover. He even went as far as suggesting they practice more often. If that wasn’t a low enough blow to her self-esteem, he had the audacity to imply maybe she should practice her blowjobs too.

JC didn’t care for the games that came along with spiteful vindictiveness, however she suspected there would be no more blowjobs in the near future for Luca. Prior to Luca, her talents received enough compliments to stroke her own ego. Luca was simply being a prick.

Two days later JC met with her agent Dan. She tried to politely un-invite Luca, but he’d already arranged to take the day off work and wasn’t about to budge. Unspoken frustration weighed heavily on JC’s mind. She didn’t understand Luca’s jealousy or his occasional snide remarks. By the time they arrived at the restaurant, she hoped Luca wouldn’t say anything to embarrass her.

Dan Carter was your average good-looking family man. Brown hair, full cheeks and light blue eyes that sparkled proudly every time he mentioned his two little girls. JC admired that about Dan. He was a bit disheveled and a no-nonsense kind of guy, but most importantly JC trusted him completely. The meeting went well. Dan assured JC that he would have a few jobs lined for her up by the end of the month.