I rose from my seat to throw my arms around my grandfather, squeezing him tight, drawing in his familiar, comforting scent. His big rough hands patted my back, and he hugged me, too. “I’ll remember,” I said. “I love you, Jilly.”
Jilly cleared his throat. “I love you too, Lil’ Bit. Now come on.” I let him loose and he rose from the rocker. “Let’s go put that big scope in the barn to use before the sky clouds up and we won’t be able to see a damn thing.”
Jilly and I watched the sky for some time that night. Neither of us brought up my heartbreak or Brax again. And I was fine with that. What’d needed to be said, had been. My family provided a deep comfort within me that nothing or no one could possibly ever replace. Later, Jilly, Mom, Seth and I played a few rounds of Texas Hold ‘Em, and chatted about plans for Thanksgiving. A family in need had been chosen at church and I was going to help Mom and a few others prepare the whole turkey dinner to take to them the night before. It was something our church did every year, and I remembered not all that long ago that our own family had been chosen. It was a good thing, and we looked forward to it every year.
Before I turned in for the night, Seth had knocked on my door, sat on the edge of my bed, and caught me up on local stuff. He told me about a girl he was interested in, how he was acing his classes without hardly even trying, and how he’d won three more shooting trophies. He looked at me then, shadows falling on his handsome face in the dim lamp light of my room, looking older than his years. “You gonna be okay, Bit?”
I cocked my head. “When did you get all grown up and sweet and stuff?”
He softly punched my arm. “I’ve always been this awesome. Now I mean it. Are you?”
I gave my brother an assuring smile. “Yeah, brat. I will be.”
I hoped I was right.
The next morning I left my family on the porch and drove straight to class. It was a long drive. I felt better; truly, I did. Jilly’s words, my mom’s comfort, and brothers’ support all converged and made me stronger. But the hurt was fresh. Deep. And I knew realistically it wouldn’t simply … go away, just like that. I mean, how could it? Despite the hurt, the slap in the face, I’d fallen in love with Brax. True love, my mom said, doesn’t fade overnight. She was right. It hadn’t. And I was stuck dealing with it. At least now, though, I believed I could. Slowly. Over time. But trust? Boy, that one had taken a big ding. I wouldn’t hand that out so easily again. Ever.
Butterflies ripped into me as I stepped into humanities. I forced my eyes to avoid the seats Brax and I usually took in the far corner of the auditorium; instead I turned down Kelsy’s aisle and grabbed an empty chair four seats behind his. Far away from Brax, and behind Kelsy, with an easy shot up the aisle to escape both directly after class.
The moment I slid into my chair, Kelsy stepped into the room. My gaze drifted up and I was shocked to see his face had been recently beaten. One eye was mostly swollen shut, with red and purple bruising all around it. His jaw was bruised. Lip split. A cut to the forehead. His gaze caught mine for a second, and he noticed my own blackened eye. He said nothing and folded into his chair, his back to me. I couldn’t help wondering what—or who—had done that to him. And why.
Brax didn’t come to class. Part of me felt relieved. Almost like something heavy had just been lifted off my chest, and to be honest that bothered me. The other part was … I don’t know. I couldn’t label it. The second lecture was over I was ready, and darted up the aisle and out of class.
“Liv, wait!” Kelsy’s voice sounded behind me, but I ignored it, hurried past other students hustling to class. My blackened eye caught some curious glances, but no one stopped me, no one spoke, and I hurried to my next class. I didn’t want to talk to Kelsy, not at all. I kept my head down, fearful of accidentally running straight into Brax, of falling apart and letting the wide split of my broken heart bleed all over the place for everyone to see. I didn’t see him, and Kelsy didn’t pursue me, either. By the time I started my physics exam, I could actually focus on it. Luckily it was a subject I loved. Most of the content I’d studied in one form or another on my own, since it was relative to astronomy. After I finished the exam, the professor pulled me aside.
“Ms. Beaumont?”
I stopped and looked at him. “Yes, sir?”
His gaze moved to my eye. “Is … everything all right?”
“Oh,” I said, and my fingertips brushed the tender skin. “Yes, sir, I was thrown off a horse, is all.”