It started as a low, distant roar, somewhere deep within me like a brewing thunderstorm, and it built and built and rolled upward through my stomach until I felt it pounding against my chest. Without thinking, my hands found strength and before I knew it, they were between our bodies, pressing against Kelsy’s chest. I pushed.
“Stay away from me,” I said quietly, and weak. I couldn’t look him in the eye anymore, so I stared past him, over his shoulder, and fixed my gaze on the square blue and white tiles on the floor. Without another word, I moved past him. I thought at first he’d let me go, leave me alone, but the second my body evened up with the end of the short corridor, his voice fell over me. Not loud. Deadly sober.
“Not in this lifetime, Olivia Beaumont.” A stern yet mocking tone deepened his already-heavy Texas drawl, and it followed me around the corner, in my mind, even as I made my way through the tables and away from the restrooms. My insides felt washed out, and cold, and full of dread and that little thing you get in the pit of your stomach when you know something’s just not right.
And never will be.
Kelsy Evans was here. At Winston. For a brief second, I stopped, and my hand grasped the wooden partition separating the dining room from the kitchen. Inside, I sagged, and tried to breathe, tried to look normal. Unaffected. Just a few more breaths and I’d be good.
Oh, God …
Across the room, I saw our booth, and Brax’s dark head turned toward the window as he faced away from me. I had to go to him. Act as if nothing was wrong. It’d been a mistake, coming here, with him. Never should I have let my guard down. Class, school, study, repeat. No socializing. Not even with a smooth-talking Southie—no matter that he put me at ease and made me laugh. It’d been a mistake. Had I not agreed, and come to this place, I wouldn’t have encountered Kelsy, and I’d have stayed safe. Now? Slowly, my feet moved, and by the time I got to the booth, I pasted a smile to my face and leaned across my seat, gathering my jacket and bag. “Thanks for dinner,” I said, and my eyes skittered across to Brax’s chest and tattooed forearms, which rested casually on the tabletop. Anywhere but his eyes. “I’d better get back, though.” I huffed a sigh. “First day of school tomorrow, plus work.” Standing, I shrugged into my jacket and fidgeted with my purse. I could feel his eyes on me, but I couldn’t bring myself to look at him.
“You okay, Gracie?”
The raspy voice, tinged with concern, stopped my fidgeting, just long enough for me to slip a quick look in his direction. His brows were jutted together, narrowing his eyes and making the skin crinkle at the corners. He didn’t believe me, I knew it. A slight noise bubbled out of my throat that resembled a strangled chuckle. “Oh, sure. I’m just tired, I guess. Kind of nervous about first day of class. You know?”
Back to the fidgeting, I adjusted the low waist of my jeans, smoothed my damp blouse, and glanced down at my toes, snuggled into my sandals. I looked out the window, then just … started walking toward the door, because Brax wasn’t budging from his seat. And I had to get out. Now.
By the time I reached the exit door, Brax’s tattooed arm reached in front of me and opened it. To his credit, he didn’t say anything, but I could feel it in the air around us. He knew I was unsettled, and I could do nothing but silently pray he’d just let it go.
Just as I was pulling on my helmet, and Brax was already straddling the bike, a voice reached through the heavy, humid air of the parking lot. It sent a streak of fear down my spine.
“Hey, Livvy, see you at school, huh?” Kelsy Evans said.
My eyes darted to that voice, and Kelsy was standing at the door of his truck. The big, black obnoxious Ford was the same one he’d driven in high school. Quickly, I turned my gaze from him, from that truck, and from the horrible memories both stirred inside of me. Fear. Revulsion. Shame. Those things had bound to my DNA, and I had to fight every day not to let it take over me. My body moved to climb onto Brax’s bike before my eyes registered the fact that Brax was no longer on it. He stood beside me, his presence looming and heavy and invasive and comforting, his large palm pressing against my lower back. I looked up at him then, and the muscles in his jaw flinched. Although he wore dark shades, I knew his gaze drifted toward Kelsy.
“You know that guy, Gracie?” His voice was scratchy and low, and a little edgy.
I didn’t want to, but I couldn’t seem to help it when my eyes moved to look at Kelsy Evans. And when I did, even from where I stood, I could see the whites of his teeth as his lips pulled away from them. He knew the reaction he caused in me. And he liked it.