The words sunk in as the crowd erupted into cheers. My head swam, and everything around me blurred. Poor little unsuspecting self-proclaimed virgin cowgirl. I was Brax’s dare. Bang ’em and leave ’em. From that very first day, Brax had lied. No wonder he’d taken off and left me. My gaze then lifted and Brax had left the fighting circle and was there, staring dead at me, not two feet away, his chest rising and falling harshly with heavy breaths. I felt frozen, unable to move and cold as ice inside. Unable to breathe. Those haunting blue eyes of his stared hard at me, unreadable, frightening. In the next second, Tessa shoved him and began guiding me toward the door. People knocked into me, my body jerked, but I didn’t really feel anything. Suddenly, I felt as though I was trapped, caged in an airless box, and I yanked my arm from Tessa and pushed through the crowd. Behind me, above the laughter and humiliating chanting of gutter fuck, I heard Brax’s frantic, guttural yell.
“Gracie! Stop!”
I didn’t stop, though, and when I hit the front door the chilly night air slapped my bare arms and legs as I rushed onto the porch, past other partiers and down the steps onto the lawn. I ran, best I could in Tessa’s heels, those gauzy little angel wings flapping at my shoulders, until a force stopped me in my tracks. Steel fingers wrapped around my wrist, my body spun around. Brax stood there, his strong hand holding onto me, his face contorted into fury and pain.
“Gracie, Jesus, I’m so fucking sorry. You don’t know the whole story.” He stepped toward me, not letting go of my hand, his voice edgy. “I tried to stop it, swear to God. Please. Just hear me out.”
Brax’s words hit me like a solid punch to the gut. Shock and anger that he’d been a part of such a low prank churned inside of me, turned to hurt, more humiliation. He’d known about it all along. I’d come to this stupid Halloween Blitz to approach Brax, to find out the truth, and the weight of his deception pressed heavy and suffocating against my chest.
I was sick of being a door mat. The butt of jokes. Of being disgraced. Of giving my trust and having it yanked away.
Every raw emotion within me collided, and without another thought, I closed my free fist tight, reared my arm back and swung as hard as I could. My knuckles connected with Brax’s steel-boned jaw, and his head snapped back in surprise. My hand exploded into white-hot pain, but I didn’t care. I didn’t give a damn, not anymore, and tears free-fell down my cheeks as I leveled my angered gaze to Brax’s.
“You can shove your lame apologies!” My voice held even, steady, belying just how rattled I truly was.
“Jesus, Gracie, your hand!” He reached for it, and I pulled back.
I turned, tried to run, and he caught me, pulled me hard against him. The heat from his body seeped through the gauzy material of the dress I wore and clung to my skin, and part of me still wanted to lean on him, melt into him. I wanted all of this to be wrong, a big mistake. I wanted it to have never happened at all. But it had. And I’d been had. Again.
He shook me. “It’s not what you think! Listen, dammit!” Brax pleaded. His fingers dug into my shoulders as he steadied me, anchored me to the spot of grass I stood in.
“No! You listen!” I said, shrugging out of his grip. From my peripheral I noticed people from the party passing slowly by, as they walked in and out of the Sigma house, watching our argument. Tessa stood there, too, waiting. Maybe I’d end up on YouTube again, and they’d all get some satisfaction from one more public humiliation out of me. It’d be the very last. I cradled the throbbing hand I’d punched him with. “I trusted you, Brax. I believed everything you’d said, despite my hesitation. Despite your thuggish looks, I never believed the rumors.” More tears burned my eyes, and I could do nothing more than shake my head and laugh. “God, was I so wrong about you. You’re no man. Just a stupid boy with no goddamn sense.” My voice caught then. Breathe.
“You weren’t wrong about me.” he growled, scrubbed his face with his hand. “This is fucked up, was taken way too far and you’ve gotta hear me out—”
“I don’t have to do anything.” Somewhere deep inside of me, I found a shred of courage. A little more self respect. I stepped closer to him, tilted my head, ignored the hurt I saw in his crystal eyes that matched the deep ache in my heart. “Just pretend you never met me, Brax.” I cocked my head, studied him. “Leave. Me. Alone.” I turned and began to walk away, but he once more followed me, grasped my uninjured wrist and swung me around to face him. The panicky pain I saw etched into his features made me flinch.