Strung(32)

“No!” the crowd shouts.

“Why?” is tossed around the room.

Micah smiles and adjusts the microphone to answer the screaming fans. “Because I’ll be performing at Express. I’ll have my own place to run, so unfortunately, I won’t be around here much. You’re more than welcome to still follow my performances, but don’t forget to show my boy Alexander some love. Tweet about Vortex and continue to spread the word.”

He’s about to start playing when a random person yells from the back of the crowd. “Will you be playing shirtless?”

He laughs and shakes his head. “Sorry, ladies.”

A few random girls scream that it’s okay and I can hear others close by talking to their friends about how they can’t wait for Express to open.

I’m happy for him. I truly am, and seeing that so many others are supportive of his upcoming bar I can’t help but to smile as he begins playing for them.

It’s best to put all of my thoughts and questions aside for now and just enjoy the strumming of his guitar as he begins humming into the microphone.

I still have over two months to figure everything out, and surely I can do it by then, right?

It takes me a few seconds to figure out what he’s about to sing, but the moment he begins singing, I recognize it from listening to music videos on Youtube.

It’s called Oceans by Jacob Lee.

The lyrics are beautiful, and every time I hear the song I only seem to love it more. It’s one of those songs that are so pretty and peaceful that you can just close your eyes and play it on repeat.

Except I can’t close my eyes right now, because as usual I need to watch Micah as he performs.

I need to watch him as he pours his heart and soul into singing. And what I love the most is that I haven’t even heard him sing his own music and I can only imagine how much passion he’s going to put into those once he plays them for everyone.

I have a feeling it’ll be enough to have me drowning in a puddle of tears in front of him.

“I’ve never heard this song before,” Jamie says quietly. “It’s so beautiful.”

“Extremely beautiful,” I whisper back, keeping my eyes on Micah’s facial expressions as he stays zoned in.

I’m enjoying the night with Jamie and Sebastian, us mostly staying quiet so we can listen to Micah, but as he announces his last song my brother scoots out the chair beside me and takes a seat. “Might want to blink before you hurt your eyes, little sis.”

Sebastian laughs. “I thought I was the only one who noticed.”

“Hey, I’m watching just like everyone else here is,” I say defensively. I grab for my beer and take a quick drink, trying to act cool. “It’s his last performance here for a while, so it’s kind of important. That’s all.”

“Is it?” Alexander asks. “Is that why he’s barely looked at anyone in the crowd besides you? Or am I just imagining that too?”

“Well, she is his girlfriend, right?” Sebastian asks, causing me to stiffen.

“What the fuck, Tegan?” Alexander stands up, but I grab his arm to calm him down before his temper causes a scene.

“No,” I say quickly. “Sebastian only thinks that because Micah asked me to keep an eye on him.”

“That better be the only reason,” he grinds out.

Sebastian and Jamie both look at me with wide eyes, surprised at how upset my brother has gotten at the idea of us dating.

“My bad for making assumptions.” Sebastian takes a sip of his soda and runs a hand through his hair. “I’m not used to Micah asking a girl to look out for me. I didn’t mean to rile anyone up.”

Alexander relaxes his shoulders and takes a seat again. “Don’t work me up like that again, got it? I don’t want to hear shit about you and Micah ever again. I can’t handle the mess that would make and you know it.”

“And you won’t have to,” I lie, my heart racing. “Now can we just enjoy the rest of the show?”

My brother nods, and when I look back at the stage Micah looks tense, but is doing his best to get through his last song.

He doesn’t make eye contact with me again until right before he sets his guitar down and stands up.

Everyone is clapping and whistling for him. I hate he has to walk right past our table as if I don’t exist in order to make my brother believe that there’s nothing going on between us.

My heart sinks as random girls jump up to hug him and flirt with him on his way into the building. As much as I try to look like it’s not upsetting me, I’m pretty sure that anyone with eyes can see it just as much as I feel it.

“You okay, little sis?” Alexander grabs my shoulders and bows his head to look down at me. “I’m only keeping you away from him for your own good. I know you guys have spent a lot of time together since you’ve gotten here, but I can promise that he’d run at the first sign of commitment. I’ve seen him with more women than I can count over the years and none of them have meant more to him than a one-night stand he could get off with. He’s damaged when it comes to love, Tegan.” He pauses to make sure Jamie and Sebastian aren’t listening to us. Once he sees that they’re wrapped up in their own conversation, he continues. “If he ever hurt you I don’t think I could forgive him. And to be honest, I care about Micah too much to lose him as a friend. I hope you understand how much I love you.”

“I do.” I can barely hear myself over the sound of my heart pounding, but I do my best to get the words out anyway. “And I love you too. You’ve always looked out for me and it means the world to me. But . . .”

“But what, Tegan? What if he can change?” He grips my shoulders tighter and shakes his head. “He can’t, because deep down he’s scared of being abandoned by another woman. He has mommy issues. So please . . . please tell me that there’s nothing going on between you two. I don’t want the two most important relationships in my life ruined.”

I want to tell him the truth, regardless of the consequences. It hurts so bad lying to him, but I can’t yet. Especially after seeing the pain in his eyes at even the possibility of a Micah and me. Right now he has hope. I don’t want to take that away.

He’s truly worried that we’ll both get hurt. He may not come out and say it, but he’s scared for Micah too, and the possibility of it not working out. He’s scared for all of us.

Now I’m sort of scared too.

I’m scared that my brother is going to hate us both for lying to him and I’m scared that maybe . . . just maybe he could be right about Micah.

What if he can’t change?

What if the thought of me leaving him has him hurting me first?

I’m not sure I can handle my heart being broken by Micah, because I’m scared that it’d never fully heal.

Not after knowing what it feels like to be in his arms.

Not after getting a taste of what it’s like to be his.

I want Micah Beck, and not just for today or tomorrow or even for the whole summer.

I want him for as long as I can keep him . . .





WALKING PAST TEGAN AFTER MY performance and having to pretend I didn’t want to wrap her up in my arms and kiss her in front of everyone felt a whole lot shittier than I thought it would.

As soon as I made it upstairs to my office, I punched my desk a few times, needing to let some frustration out.

It’s been close to thirty minutes since Alexander and Tegan had a little conversation before she left, and I can’t stop thinking about what he said to her. Not knowing what is driving me crazy over the possibilities.

I’m pacing around my office, still worked up, waiting on a text or anything from Tegan when the door opens and someone steps inside.

“Everything good, Man?” I raise my head to see Alexander standing in the doorway, watching me with hard eyes. “You seem a little upset about something? Anything you want to talk to me about?”

I run a hand through my hair and steel my jaw, while shoving my phone into my back pocket. “Nothing you want to hear. It doesn’t concern you.”

He steps further inside and closes the door behind him. “I can see the way you look at my sister. What I can’t figure out is if that means you’ve already touched her or that you want to, but either way, I better not hear shit about you two hooking up. I’ve never given you shit about your personal life. This is the only fucking request I have for you. She’s my family. Blood is thicker than friendship. I hope like hell that you don’t break my trust and five years of friendship over pussy because you can’t keep your dick in check. That’s the only one that’s ever been off limits.”

“So you thought it’d be a good idea to bring Parker in the fucking picture?” I step closer to him and look him in the eyes when I speak. “Why . . . because he had a good life growing up? Parents who looked out for him and bought him things, fed him, and all that good shit that I didn’t have? Does that make him better than me? Or is it because he doesn’t feel the need to keep everyone at a distance in fear of getting hurt? What makes you think I’m not good enough for her? That I can’t love someone when I find the right one? Am I that big of a piece of shit to you? Because you keep calling me a friend but you’re not acting like one.”