“Wow. So you can cook, too?” she said, admiring the apartment’s modern kitchen.
“Decide after we eat,” he said, grinning. “It’s ready when you are.”
“Okay, let’s eat, then.”
As they sat across from each other at Chris’ small kitchen table, Abby admired him. She liked the way his thick gold waves always looked a little messy. He wore a blue button-down shirt that made her feel like she was on a real date, even though they were just sitting in his kitchen.
“Are you laughing at me?” he asked, looking amused at the thought.
“No,” she said, blushing.
He smiled and she could tell he wanted to say something.
“What’s on your mind?” she asked.
“The other night. I’ve been thinking about it a lot.” He sighed and shook his head. “Abby, please don’t take this the wrong way, but I really wish you’d quit that job.”
“Like I told you, I need the money.”
“I don’t think you do, though. Justin can take out loans for college and med school, a lot of people do. And you and Audrey and Sara could move into an apartment if you needed to.”
“I have my Mom, too,” Abby reminded him.
“Yeah, but why?”
“Why? Chris, she’s my Mom.”
“I don’t want to ruin this night with an argument,” he said. “Just know that I want you to be happy.”
“I’m very happy. I know it’s hard for you to understand, but I need the financial security the club gives me. After the way I grew up, I just need it.”
He looked like he wanted to comment, but he didn’t. When they had finished dinner, Abby helped him with the dishes, smiling as she watched him stack the plates in a neatly organized cabinet.
“You’re so domesticated,” she said.
“I am. Bachelors have to do all this stuff for ourselves.” He looked serious as he hung the dishtowel over the stove handle and leaned against the counter.
“We’ve known each other a couple months,” he said. A few seconds elapsed as he gathered his thoughts. “Remember when we first met, and you said I was on the rebound?”
She nodded, wondering where he was going with this. Her stomach rolled as realization dawned on her.
“Oh, my God. You’re getting back with your ex, aren’t you?” she said.
“Christ, no! Never. I’m just wondering if you still think I’m on the rebound.”
“Have you met someone new?” She felt a burn of jealousy but tried to remain nonchalant.
“Well, sort of.”
She looked away, crushed. She knew their friendship would end, and she understood why.
“Chris, that’s good. I’m happy for you,” she said, working to keep her voice level.
“It’s you.”
“Me?”
“Yes. The list of ground rules is getting really long, because pretty much everything you do makes me want to kiss you, touch you…or worse.”
The loud rhythm of her pounding heart was the only sound Abby could hear. Chris wanted her. Hearing him say it felt better than she’d thought possible.
“Worse?” she said, her voice shaky.
“Much worse,” he said, reaching for her waist and pulling her into him. “Abby, what I did to you the other night in the sleeping room … I can do so much more. All I want is to take you to bed and show you how good I can make you feel.”
“Do you mean now?” she asked, embarrassed by the eagerness in her voice. She willed him to say yes, because just his words were giving her a warm, wet sensation.
“I won’t have casual sex with you. Do you want us to become something more than we are?”
“I want it, yes, but is it possible? We’re both skittish about relationships.”
“I’m past that. I want to be with you, Abby. The past couple months have shown me that. The only thing holding me back now is the stripping.”
“The stripping?” She was taken aback. “You don’t want to be with me because I’m a stripper?”
It confirmed all the reservations and fears she’d had about getting closer to Chris. She would always feel like she was less than him, and not good enough.
“Not for the reason you think,” he said. “I just don’t want to share you. I’ll be the best boyfriend you can imagine. I’ll treasure you completely. But I won’t have other men using you to get off, or hurting you.”
“You won’t have it?” Abby cried, stepping back from him. “Chris, I’ve been dancing to support my family for four years. I can’t do it forever. I have to save as much money as I can while I’m still young enough to do it. You can’t just come in here and expect me to quit so you’ll be my boyfriend. It’s not a bad habit, it’s my job.”